hiding from Heaven and Hell
by crazyrapunzel
Summary: Could you imagine what it's like when your mother sends a vampire after you? Aliza knows. She learns the hard truth, about demons, hunters and herself. Partly raised by Bobby, she turns out a hell of a hunter. Despite her skills, it's hard when Hell and Heaven want you dead, for a reason unknown. This will be a (smutty) romance, but you'll have to read some awesome backstory first.
1. Chapter 1

**Part one: Family**

 **Mommy's favorite**

'Damn this piece of junk!' Bobby grunted as the old radio refused to do his job and play music. When Bobby slapped the thing one more time on the top, even the wheezing noise died out. Bobby turned away from his source of frustration. It wasn't the only old dusty thing in his house, at the end of his auto salvage property. Last week there was a problem with the fridge, causing all his beer to go to waste. All the pipes in the house creaked when someone took a shower, and when the wind was howling hard, Bobby prayed his roof would hold.

But there is little Bobby couldn't fix. Not just the house that was held together by an awful lot of duct tape – that stuff was really a godly invention – not even the cars that were brought in, the ones that any mechanic would tell were only good for scrap metal. Bobby also fixed a family. One of his best friends and fellow hunter, John Winchester, and his two boys. The family has been going through a lot. First the loss of Mary, and now John's insane task in finding the thing that did it. He was blinded by revenge. The ones suffering from that, were his sons.

Dean and Sam Winchester. Dean would turn thirteen next month. Bobby bet his entire beer stock on it that John would forget, again. Dean was a smart kid. He trained well to become a very good hunter. He knew when he needed to be quiet, when to help his father carrying guns and when to take care of his little brother. He was a good little soldier.

Sam was quite a bit younger and more innocent. Until so far, John and Dean withheld the truth from him. He was simply too young to figure out his life has been a lie. Bobby didn't like keeping the boy in the dark. It was mostly Dean who pleaded for his brother to be a kid for a little longer. Bobby didn't have the heart to go against it.

Tired from a long day of working in the salvage garage, Bobby collapsed into the comfy chair behind his desk. With a satisfying 'plop' he removed the cap from the bottle of whiskey. It was a second later he realised the sound was way too loud to only come from his bottle. Bobby froze, trying to listen.

There is was again. A faint sound somewhere in the distance. He looked up to notice the window still slightly open. Earlier he had knocked over a can of sardines, and he still tried to clear out the stench now drained in his carpet. Another sound followed. It made the hairs on his neck stand on edge, his ears prickling to listen. It was a clear scream. A clear non-human scream.

He grabbed his shotgun and machete. He didn't know for sure what he was hunting, so he took enough precaution. Sliding soundlessly through the door and onto his front porch, he heard more sounds. It was clear something was walking around on his property. He rounded another corner and walked along a line of parked cars. Most of them were beyond saving, some already gathering dust for over ten years. He noticed that the noises were still far away. Then something shifted in the corner of his eye.

Bobby swung his body around to point his shotgun at the figure hunching in between two cars. Startled, the figure fell back on its hands and behind. Bobby's eyes grew big once his sight adjusted to the dark shadows surrounding the small form.

'A kid?' he spoke to no one in particular. The young girl stared down the barrel of the gun with big, fearful eyes. After a minute Bobby relaxed, and remembered kids weren't used to a gun being pointed at them. He lowered his aim slowly away.

'What are you doing here?' he asked bewildered.

The girl decided to move forward. She pushed herself up on her hands. In contrast with her appearance on the ground, she was actually quite tall. She had light blonde hair, tangled up and plastered to her face and neck. Her clothes and face matched in stains and dirt. Her clothing was torn up on her knees, displaying grazes on her knees. She must have fallen down somewhere. Her big eyes looked up at the old man. Bobby cocked his head to the side to look at her odd eyes. The girl had Heterochromia: her one eye was bright blue, almost looking like it gave light. The other was a green-greyish shade. Somehow it made her look weird and beautiful at the same time. Bobby estimated her age around ten years.

'I was hiding from the monster,' she spoke with a soft voice. Apart from her low volume, her voice didn't shake. It sounded steady and determined.

'Why-,' Bobby tried to start when he saw the fear grow in her eyes, almost reflecting the attacker behind him.

'Behind you!' she screamed, however her look of horror had been enough for Bobby to turn around. He was a second too late, as the lean guy was too close to shoot. Bobby held the shotgun in between the two of them, trying to push him off his body. The man towered over the smaller hunter. As if on command of Bobby's silent question what kind of monster he was facing, the man opened his mouth and extracted the row of fangs in front of his normal teeth.

Vamp.

Super freaking fantastic.

The vampire leaned down in an attempt to reach Bobby's neck, when Bobby pushed his strength into his arms, knocking the vamp a step back. He engaged immediately again, launching his entire form at Bobby. Bobby took the second he had to extract his machete he luckily brought with him. The vamp engaged on his wrist first, forcing the machete away from his body. He slowly pushed the blade around, angling towards Bobby's chest.

Before Bobby could come up with a counter attack, the girl had slammed an iron bar against the vamp his calves, buckling him forward, screaming out in pain and frustration. That sound was the last thing leaving him before Bobby quickly decapitated the monster. The lifeless body fell to the ground. Bobby gained his vision back on the girl, standing on the other side of the body. Blood was splattered across her face and clothes. Bobby and the girl stared at each other for a long moment, both catching their breaths.

The girl swallowed, and Bobby prepared for her panic and tears to come in. But they didn't. Instead, she calmly asked:

'Is he really dead now?'

Bobby needed a moment to process her calm words.

'Yeah. Why was it chasing you?'

She finally turned her head down, the first display of emotion on her face. She took a long moment before answering.

'My mommy send it after me.'

There was so much wrong with that answer. A chill ran down Bobby's back.

'Why would she do that?' he whispered, not really believing she had just said that.

The girl hugged herself. Bobby was suddenly aware it was almost dark, and a chilly wind was pulling on. He started to take off his flannel shirt, but the girl gave a short decline and 'thank you'. Then she answered his question.

'She was mad. Really mad. She said I…' It took the girl a moment, and she stared straight back at the astonished man. 'She said I needed to die. So she threw a kitchen knife at me, but I ran. Then I heard her scream to the man to chase me. Normally I would never come here, but it was close by, and I thought I could hide here.'

Bobby sighed deeply and cursed under his breath. _The hell did this girl get caught up in?_

'Okay. How about I take you back? I'm pretty sure there is a mistake here,' He spoke as he started to walk towards a functional car. The girl rushed after him, tugging on his arm.

'No! She'll kill me! Please help me, mister Singer!' she pleaded with her odd, big eyes.

Bobby looked down at her. Normally he hated kids. Above all, kids that were running around on his property. But this was different. Plus, she was still covered in vamp blood. He knelt to be at her eye level.

'Okay, how about you stay in the car, and I talk with your parents?'

The girl considered it for a moment, then she nodded without looking at him. Bobby found himself confused by this kid. She seemed to have the mental attitude of an grown person.

Not just a grown person…a very well-adjusted grown person. Like a hunter.

Bobby quickly shook that thought away. He walked to the car, snatching an old rag from the dashboard. He handed it to the girl as she sat down in the passenger seat. She thanked him quietly before wiping her face.

* * *

'Here it is,' said the little voice from beside Bobby. He pulled the car over across the street from the quite large house the girl pointed out to be her home. He looked around at the girl. She sat very quietly in her seat. She held the rag loosely between her hands in her lap, and stared out the front window. She was avoiding looking at the house. Bobby saw a line of tears streaming down her cheek. Still, she didn't sob. Didn't make a sound.

Bobby hesitantly laid a hand on her shoulder. She looked at the man who smiled awkwardly at her. It actually caused a little smile.

'My parents were wrong. They told me I should never talk to the grumpy drunk man in the car garage. But you're not so bad,' she said wisely.

Bobby uneasily grunted something about staying in the car as he opened his door. When he walked up to the house her words rang in his head. Had anyone ever said that about him? Like, any human being, telling him he 'wasn't so bad'?

He forced himself to clear his mind when he walked up the steps to the front door. The door was slightly open, the chains of the lock spread over the floor.

'Well that can't be good,' he murmured.

The door opened with difficulty. When the opening was big enough for Bobby to squeeze through, he found the coatrack, fallen over and broken, to be the obstacle behind the door. Bobby tiptoed though the hallway. He took the door to the living room. Of all the scenarios he had mentally prepared himself for, this was the worst.

A woman with dark hair and a curved body stood in the middle of the room. All furniture was pushed to the walls with great force, noticeable by the cracks in the walls and the stuffing of the couch and pillows spilling out. Not far away from where he stood, laid a man on the ground. He laid on his back, neck exposed as his head looked up at the destroyed room. His mouth was wide open, a line of blood drying on his cheek. His green-grey eyes were wide open, staring at the ceiling. He was stabbed multiple times in his…well, everywhere.

'It sure as hell took me some effort to get you here, old man,' the woman spoke with a sharp voice. Bobby forced his look away from the murdered husband, back to the wife. She slowly spun around, facing him. She had a twisted smirk on her face, totally out of place on this sweet woman's face. He focused on her green eyes, moments before she blinked and they turned to a deep black colour. Bobby took a step back in surprise and fear.

'Balls! You're a demon, ain't ye?' Bobby said breathless.

The woman, most likely once the girl her mother, gave a high pitched giggle.

'Haven't seen a lot of us, have you?' she said playfully. Bobby took it as an 'you're still a virgin at this' kind of commend.

Bobby tried to compose himself. 'Why did you kill him?' he asked while pointing at the body next to him.

The demon cocked her head to the side as her eyes turned back to normal.

'He had it coming. He complained a lot about my cooking,' she pouted, like she had only hit him with a newspaper.

'And the girl?' Bobby asked before thinking. _Stupid! Why did you bring her up?!_

Her head snatched up at an unhuman speed. 'Where is she?'

Bobby took a protective step towards the doorpost. 'Not anywhere you can find her. What makes you so interested in one child?'

She took a stroll around the room, seeming bored by the conversation. Bobby prayed she wouldn't attack out of the blue. He had indeed seen only one demon before in his life. Demon possessions weren't very common. Two, maybe three a year. This year that had already been crossed, and it was only August.

'I don't have any interest in her. My boss does,' she matter-of-factly stated.

Bobby scrunched his eyebrows together. 'And who might your daddy demon be?'

She snatched her head back at his words. 'Oh you will find out. He knows everything about you. About those Winchesters. He has great plans. But the boys are still too young. He needs to wait. He thought the girl could be useful, but she turned out to be quite the opposite.'

'What's that supposed to mean?' Bobby pressed, all too aware of the person of interest sitting across the street.

She crossed her arms over her chest. 'I don't know what is wrong with her, but that kid ain't human. She made me itch to kill her, more than anything.'

Bobby suppressed the shiver going down his back.

'And I can feel it now too. She is close,' she said with a threatening tone. Bobby gave the demon one more glare before turning and speeding across the lane to the car. To his distress, the car wasn't were he left it. He stood helplessly at the sidewalk, when he heard tires screeching. He snapped his head to the right, where he saw an odd scene.

Two men were flying through the air after being hit by his car. Behind the wheel he saw the small face of the girl. She brought the car in front of Bobby. He opened the door, as she shoved over to the passenger seat.

'They had black eyes!' the girl screamed out in panic. Bobby plunged his foot down on the gas pedal, speeding away from the dazed demons.

'I know kid, I know.'

* * *

Not really knowing what else to do, he drove back to his house. He locked the door and took out some books on demons. He drew a devil's trap on the doormat, and salted all the doors and windows. After the shock, he sat himself and the girl down. He told her that her father was dead, and her mother possessed by a demon. She was utterly quiet. She was weeping as she sat on the sofa, her hands on her knees. He could see her nails digging in her skin from time to time. He left the part out about her having a weird kind of attraction to demons. How did you tell a kid it wasn't human, after she had seen the worst of the supernatural world?

She had nodded a couple of times. Then they discussed what they needed to do. Bobby suddenly felt very protective over the kid. He should give her to the foster system, or letting her see family. She had told him she had a Steph-sister, who was staying over at a friend's house. She called her sister, telling her not to go home before the police were in on it. She assured the girl on the phone, Channah he recalled, that she was safe. When she hung up, no emotion was written on her face, apart from the pain that was made clear by her tears. Bobby couldn't wrap his head around this kid. It fascinated him even more.

He told her to go upstairs, where she could have her room. The next day they would think on it again, but now he was too tired. She stood up and walked to the stairs without a word, before Bobby stopped her.

'Hey, what's your name, kid?'

She looked around at him.

'I'm Aliza.'

* * *

 **Well hello there!**

 **Are you enjoying the story? I hope so. I am currently writing this story. I've got good feeling about this one, so I think this is gonna be a long one.**

 **Please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hope**

For the tenth time that day, Bobby heard a thud, muffled by two stories of his house. He grinned a little when the sound of a frustrated little girl followed. She screamed to her walls, angrily stomping though her room. Aliza had been studying all day. If Bobby learned one thing about the girl, it was that she didn't give up easily.

Bobby had taken the girl in. At least for as long as her demon mother was still kicking. Aliza proofed to be great hunter material: she wasn't afraid when Bobby told her about ghosts, werewolves and shapeshifters, she stayed in the house, knowing outside was too dangerous, and above all: she wanted to learn. She wanted to be ready for when the nightmares would come for her.

The first couple of weeks were quite awkward. Bobby had taken care of Dean and Sam, but he had known the boys from their birth on. This girl had a persona, a strong will…and well, she was still a girl. Bobby thanked whoever made her quite the boyish type, cursing himself if he had to paint her nails or braid her hair. But Aliza never did those things. What she did all day, was learning and training. Bobby showed her how to throw knives; thinking it might be the least harmful for the kid. He tried to teach her to fight too, but they were too uneven to make good sparring partners.

After a morning of boot camp she would lock herself up in her room – previously Dean's room – and start on a thick old book of lore or hunter diaries. That day was no different. Mostly she would test herself on her knowledge, and Bobby could clearly hear when it went wrong. Most of the times she ended up throwing the book through the room or down the stairs, yelling after it for being so damn hard to understand. He couldn't blame her; some of the text even he didn't follow. All and all, he was impressed by the girl, and started to warm up to her.

* * *

'Uncle Bobby?' Aliza's soft voice broke the silence. Bobby looked up from the book he was reading in full concentration. They were both sitting in the study room. He behind his desk, she in the old sofa. She had her short legs displayed over the length of the sofa, resting her back against the arm rest.

'What is it, kid?' he said, starting to realize how late it was. They had both been sitting and reading for hours, not noticing time slipping away.

Aliza looked out the window, at the night sky. It was a clear evening.

'Do you think angels are real?'

Bobby was taken aback by her serious question. He had anticipated she would ask whether she really needed to get up early the next morning, or maybe that she wanted him to get her something else to eat that the canned food. He scratched the back of his neck, searching for an answer.

'I don't believe in angels,' he stated.

Aliza scrunched her eyebrows together. 'Why not?'

Bobby sighed deeply and opened his drawer: he needed a drink with this conversation. Aliza didn't look up at his action, she had not said a word about his alcohol usage, and he was pretty sure it didn't bother her.

'Because the world has been dragged through the mud so many times. So many good people suffer. How can angels watch that and not act on it?' He told her, not really interested in the topic.

However, Aliza wasn't done. 'I think life, and with that the suffering, is all a test. To see how people act on things.'

Bobby snorted. 'That sound quite religious. How did you get that idea?'

Aliza looked down at the book she was holding, and absently stroked the back.

'My father used to say that.'

Bobby thickly swallowed the swig he had just taken. He looked away, afraid to meet her eyes. But he had to say something.

'Look…kid,' he started. However, Aliza closed the book and put in back on the shelf. She stood on the other side of his desk, looking slightly down at him.

'I'll go to bed. I'll be out, starting on the push-ups at eight A.M.,' she simply stated. Bobby looked at her and gave a small nod. She walked away with determined steps. Bobby took another swig.

* * *

Aliza ran up the stairs all the way to the room in the attic. She closed the door behind her, twisting the key once in the lock. She had wanted to make it hard for intruders to get in, but she still wanted a fast escape route if necessary. She kicked her shoes to the side and slid into the way too big shirt that functioned as her pyjamas. She jumped under the blanket and stared at the slanting ceiling.

She was quite happy with her new life here. Bobby turned out to be much better company than her parents had told her. She remembered when Channah and some friends had sneaked onto his car yard one day, and the man had chased them off, yelling angrily he hated teenagers. Her parents somehow found out, and they had told Channah over and over that Bobby was a bad man, one you didn't want to make angry.

And here she was, sleeping under his roof, while hiding from her murderous mother. How one's life could be turned a 180 degrees. She started to like Bobby, even his grumpy moments – which were a lot. She knew when she could ask him things, and when she better stayed at her room. She liked her room too. It was quite big, with a comfy bed in it. She had an own bathroom and little dresser table. She couldn't picture Bobby needing a mirror and dresser table, so she wondered why it was here. Maybe he once had a wife, or a daughter? A question she had to ask later.

A flash of lighting shocked her abruptly from her thoughts. She jumped a little in her bed. As the rain started pouring harder on the window, she pulled the blankets up to her nose. She hated thunder. It scared her more than the thought of those black-eyed men. She learned that demons could be killed, or at least sent back to hell. But thunder would always exist. You can't fight it, you can't kill it.

And as she listened to the storm out there, she wondered when she started thinking in a world of things that you can and can't kill.

* * *

'Stop whining and help me boy,' John said harshly.

Dean shut his mouth the instant his father started talking and grabbed his bag from the trunk of his father's car, the Impala. It was somewhere around 3 o'clock in the night, and the rain poured heavily down on them.

'Come on Sammy, carry your own bag,' Dean said when he noticed his brother wasn't following him. Sam stared out thought the open door, a disgusted look on his face.

'I don't want to get wet,' he protested against his older brother. Dean turned around to their father, afraid he had heard that. But John was already halfway to the door. Dean turned back to Sam.

'Do you want to sleep in the car then? Don't be a baby Sam,' Dean snapped.

Sam looked down. Dean regretted his words the moment he saw Sam's reaction. Sometimes when his dad had a foul mood, Dean would copy it. He hated himself for it, and even more for firing his frustration at his little brother. Nonetheless, it got Sam out in the rain – muttering under his breath – and both of them into the house. John had opened the door with his own key.

'Bobby, I'm back. Can you take the boys in for some weeks?' John shouted through the house. Dean and Sam followed him in the study room, finding Bobby asleep with his face on the hard desk. John shook him.

'Bobby! Damn it wake up!'

Bobby seemed way too fast asleep to wake any time soon. John sighed in frustration, before he turned back on his – soaked - sons.

'Well, I need to go, no time for sleeping beauty to wake up. You know the routine: listen to Bobby. I'll be back in three to four weeks. Behave,' he drilled.

Dean nodded. 'Yes Sir.'

Sam copied his brother, with an unsteady voice.

John walked past them, giving them both a pet on the head. Then he ran to the Impala and drove into the night.

Dean took his bag from the ground and slung it over his shoulder. 'Come on Sammy. We'll tell Bobby in the morning we're here. Let's get to bed.'

Sam followed Dean up the stairs. They had a habit when they stayed at Bobby's: the first night they would sleep in the same room, to comfort his brother a bit. The rest of the stay Sam would be retreating to his own room. They walked all the way up to the attic, where the biggest room was. Dean tried the door, but it seemed to be locked.

'That's weird,' Dean said while drawing his eyebrows together. He found an iron tool he could use to push the key around. He opened the door in seconds.

Dean went in the room first. He took about two steps when he saw something moving in the corner of his eye. He turned back, but was already too late. Someone hit him hard in the stomach. He doubled over, holding his stomach in pain. Sam seemed petrified. Dean had to face the threat himself. He kicked his foot out in a sudden motion, causing the person to fall back. Dean took a second to jump on top of the person, twisting it around so it faced the floor, with the arms behind its back.

'Ouch! Stop it!' the person screamed. Dean started to realise the person was shorter than him. Then he noticed the voice belonging to a girl. Sam found the light switch.

'What are you doing here?' Dean yelled at the person pinned beneath him.

'Me? Who are you to get into my room?' she squeaked back.

This confused Dean even more. 'What? This is my room!'

'No it's not!' she tried to wiggle herself out of his hold, but failed to do so.

After a long minute of shouting at each other, Bobby seemed to finally be awoken by the noise. He stumbled up the stairs, storming into the room.

'Bobby! There is a strange girl in the room!' Dean shouted.

'Bobby! This boy intruded the house!' Aliza shouted at the same time.

Bobby sighed heavily before pulling Dean off the girl.

'Let go Dean,' he ordered the boy. Dean looked surprised Bobby didn't take is side. Then the old hunted helped Aliza back on her feet. He placed his face in front of her, slightly bending over.

'Did you attack Dean when he entered the room?' he asked. The question sounded like a 'did you steal a cookie from the jar' kind of question. Aliza looked at him in disbelief.

'But he-,' she tried.

'Answer me, Aliza,' Bobby said sternly.

Aliza looked at Dean, who kind of watched with that surprised look frozen on his face.

'Yes,' she told him through her teeth. 'He was sneaking into my room.'

'Bobby, why does she keep saying this is her room?' Sam suddenly added. He had been quiet the whole time.

'Because it is. Aliza lives here now,' Bobby said as he turned around to the boys.

That shook Dean out of his trance. 'What?'

Bobby sighed and awkwardly tried to introduce the fighting children.

'Dean, Sam, this is Aliza. She is staying here due to…problems. Aliza, these boys are Dean and Sam Winchester. Their father is a friend of mine. They stay here from time to time.'

Dean gave Bobby an irritated look.

Aliza pushed some strings of hair out of her face. 'Okay then.'

Bobby sighed again. 'It's half past three or so. All go to bed, now. Dean, Sam, you take the room at the second floor. No complaining. I want to sleep, so you better not wake me again.'

With that he walked out of the door, and they heard him retreat to his bedroom. Aliza didn't know what to expect would happen next. They stood a little awkwardly looking at each other. Then Sam broke the tension by walking up to Aliza. She looked at him with big eyes as he held out his hand.

'Hi! Nice to meet you!' he says with joyful eyes.

Aliza doubts her action for a moment, before she takes his hand and shakes it.

'I guess it is,' she said, partly retreated into her mind. Their hands let go. Aliza looks up at the other boy in the room.

'Sorry I attacked you,' she tells him with a focused look.

Dean just stared at her, annoyance and a little anger still written on his young face. Then he turned and left the room without saying a word. Sam shrugged once before following. Aliza watched them go. Even after Sam shut the door with a loud bang, she remained staring.

 _What did just happen?_

She had company now. She wasn't alone with Bobby anymore. Was that a good thing? She didn't know a thing about these boys, and one clearly didn't like her.

Still she had the urge to show him she was fun. To make him like her. She turned and laid back down in her bed, her mind still wandering.

* * *

A drop of sweat trickled down Aliza's forehead, catching in the corner of her eye. She tried to blink it away. She couldn't use her hands, since she was standing in the planking position. She kept staring up at Dean, who stood a little further in the backyard. Another flash of silver flew through the air and hit the target board Dean was aiming for.

Aliza bit the pain in her abs away. She would hold longer. She wasn't going to give up. Dean wasn't even watching her, his focus was on the tiny knives he was throwing. Still, she wanted to prove herself. She was as strong as he was. Her arms started to shake heavily. With another deep sigh she fell to the grass.

'Argh!' she exclaimed in frustration. She wanted to go again, but her body refused. She sat up and spotted Dean finally looking her way, his hand with a knife in it still hanging mid-air.

Aliza rolled her eyes. Of course he was looking when she gave up. She pushed herself to her feet – with some effort – and decided to walk up to him. He turned around and threw the last knife. It missed the target big time. He walked up to the board to retrieve the knives.

'Is this your kind of training?' Aliza asked him, staying at some distance.

Dean snorted, his back turned to her. 'I don't do useless running, if that's what you mean. Not such a fan of sweating in general.'

Aliza ignored his bad humour. 'I mean, why do you get up early to throw knives?'

She could see his shoulders tense at her question.

'Not your concern,' he threw back.

Aliza rolled his answer back and forth in her head. Then she started to laugh softly. Dean turned and faced her, surprised by her choice of response. Aliza pushed her hip out, planting a hand on it.

'I get it. You think I don't know.'

Dean scrunched his eyebrows together. 'Don't know what?'

'About monsters. About hunters.'

Dean froze. His pupils shrunk to tiny spots. He tried to stammer an answer out.

Aliza held her hand up. 'Yeah, I already saw a vampire too. Really, what is the big deal? I'm staying with Bobby for a reason you know?'

Moving faster than she could see coming, Dean suddenly appeared right in front of her. His height towered slowly over her. His eyes were furious.

'Shut up! Don't talk so loud!' Dean hissed at her. 'You think you are though because you saw a monster? And what, Bobby saved you? You can't go around, yelling things like that! Some people can't know!'

Aliza looked back up at him. Her heartbeat had increased. Unless the tension, she still focussed on his words.

'And with 'people', you mean Sam,' she whispered.

Dean took a step back in surprise. Nevertheless, the anger didn't leave his expression.

'Yes. He is too young. I want him to be a kid for a little longer,' he suddenly said with a smaller voice.

'I understand,' Aliza whispered, deliberately staring at the ground. She started to realise he was right. She didn't even think about it. She could have walked up to Sam and asked him about monsters. Her cheeks started to burn. Dean seemed to notice. He cleared his throat before walking back inside. Aliza remained outside, but she didn't feel like going for a run.

Some hours later that day, all the inhabitants of the house gathered for lunch. They ate together at the kitchen table, in complete silence. Bobby seemed to think the silence awkward. He shifted on his chair, and deliberately made big noises while making his sandwich.

Aliza was happy it was silent. She still felt terrible. Since that morning, she hadn't even faced Dean. Sam had asked her some questions about herself, but she tried not to answer. For example, he asked where her parents were. That question in particular nearly caused her to cry.

They cleared the table after lunch. Dean and Aliza set on doing the dishes. Aliza stared at the plates while she dried them.

'Dean, shall we play hide and seek?' Sam said when he ran back in the kitchen. Dean turned around to face him.

'We can't. The game is no fun with two, I told you that before,' he stated.

Sam pointed his finger at Aliza. 'But we are with three now! So we can finally play it!'

Aliza stared blankly at Sam. She wanted to play. Hide and seek was always her favourite game to play with her family. Her dad used to choose the same spot every time when Aliza was very little, so Aliza would feel good at the game.

'Uhm…I don't want to play,' she lied.

Sam's lip pouted out, his eyes shining with beginning tears. 'Please?'

Aliza did something she hadn't done all day: she directly looked at Dean. Only now she noticed he had been looking at her for a while. Dean put the plate he was holding in the rack, and dried his hands on his trousers. He closed his eyes for a moment. When they opened, his look had changed. He was no longer emotionless. He looked happy. A genuine smile on his face. Then he placed his hand on Aliza's back. She stared back.

'Sure you do. Come on, let's play,' he said.

There was no false statement. No sarcasm. He was really just…nice.

'Really?' she asked, raising one eyebrow.

Dean's smile widened. 'Really.' He turned to Sam. 'Why don't you pick a spot where the seeker needs to start?'

Sam didn't need another word before he darted out of the front door. They followed him at a slower pace.

'Look, Dean…I'm sorry,' Aliza started, but Dean interrupted her.

'No, I'm sorry. You were recently thrown into this world of nightmares, and all you do is trying to deal with it. I am just so afraid for Sammy. I don't ever want to tell him, but that is impossible. It isn't your fault. So, sorry I was mean. Can we be friends?'

Aliza took his words in slowly before replying: 'I'd like that.'

Dean took her hand and tugged her onward, running after Sam.

* * *

 _Oh god! Not again!_ Aliza thought when once again hell broke loose outside. The thunder started rolling closer and closer. It wouldn't take long before it was around the house.

A knock on the door distracted her. She faced the door. Dean poked his head in.

'Hi. Can I come in?' he asked calmly.

Aliza nodded. Dean sat with her on the bed, both with their legs crossed.

'You have trouble sleeping too?' Dean asked, looking at the clock at the wall telling it was somewhat past two. Aliza nodded.

'I hate thunder. It scares me more than demons.'

Dean's mouth fell open. 'You saw a demon?' he whispered.

Aliza raised an eyebrow. 'You haven't?'

Dean looked her straight in the eye. 'Demon possessions don't happen a lot. Maybe three or four each year. Even Bobby has only seen one once,' he told her.

Aliza was quiet. Then Dean asked: 'What happened?'

Aliza sighed deeply. She closed her eyes and considered telling him.

'A couple of weeks ago, I came home from school. My step-sister was over at a friend's house. My parents were supposed to be home. And they were, in some way. My mom started yelling at me, how I needed to die. I fled, but she send a vampire after me. I hid here, between the cars. Bobby found me and killed the vampire. Then he went back to my parents' house. That's when he found…'

Aliza swallowed. She had decided she wasn't going to cry over it anymore. What did tears help? But she couldn't help feeling like her heart got ripped out at the memory.

'My father was dead, my mother was a demon.'

She hugged her knees. A spot on the wall became her focus point, as she tried so hard not to cry. Dean sat completely still.

'I'm sorry,' he whispered. His tone was steady, mature even. Aliza looked at him, and found pity in his eyes. But also…understanding?

Dean felt her question coming, so he answered.

'My mother was killed by some monster too. I don't know who or what. My dad is trying to find it, and get revenge.' Dean looked sad. Even weary. How did a child like her look so much older in his eyes, like he's been to hell and back?

She took his hand between hers. 'I'm sorry too.'

The lightning flashed, and Aliza jumped. Dean watched her, his pity for the girl growing. He placed his other hand on top of hers.

'Why don't you come with me downstairs? The sound isn't so loud, and you wouldn't have to be alone,' he offered with a smile.

Aliza nodded and followed him downstairs. The room was dark, the curtains were thick enough to block the lightning. Sam was sleeping on one edge of the bed. It was supposed to be for two people, but they were small enough to fit with three.

She slept very good that night, despite the storm. To her it felt like she got a little bit of happiness back. A bit of hope. A bit of family. Of course, with her luck, that wouldn't last long.


	3. Chapter 3

**Daddy issues**

That night John came back. Once again he came in at an unfortunate time. The sun had just begun to rise when John found his key to the front door. He didn't find Bobby in the study, so this time he would have made it to his bed, John assumed.

Trying to be quiet, he walked up the stairs. He was aiming for Bobby, but something caught his eye. The door to the other bedroom was just opened at a creak. John pushed the door further open.

And he needed a moment to realize what he saw.

'What is this?' he grunted loudly.

All three people in the bed woke instantly. Dean sat straight up, while Sam and Aliza took a moment to rub their eyes.

'Dad? You're already back?' Dean asked, fear dripping from his words.

John took some steps closer to the bed. His eyes were fixed on the girl in the middle. Aliza started to realize she was in trouble.

'What,' he repeated, this time more threatening, 'is this?'

Dean sat up on his knees on the bed. 'Dad, it's okay. She-,'

'Don't you dare telling me it's okay, boy! Out of the bed, now!'

All three stood up and left the warm blanket. They heard muffled sounds from the other room. Bobby must be awake. Aliza couldn't wait for him to get here.

'You,' John pointed his finger in between her eyes, 'Who the hell are you?'

Aliza settled with calm answers. 'I'm Aliza.'

'And what the hell are you doing in here, with my sons?'

She was ready to start explaining, but then had a second thought about Sam. She couldn't tell the truth. John figured she took too long to answer. He grabbed her small arm in his hand and dragged her out of the room, down the stairs. Aliza protested in pain.

Once downstairs they heard people hurrying off the stairs.

'John, let her go!' Bobby shouted.

Nevertheless, he didn't let go. He brought her to the front door. But before he could put her in the cold morning air, Bobby got a hold on the other man and yanked him back. John spun around until he faced Bobby.

'Stop that! She is staying with me! She needs protection!' Bobby yelled in his face.

Bobby pushed Aliza back. She was caught by Dean and Sam.

'No random child is in contact, and _definitely_ not in bed with my boys! She goes out!' John spat back.

Bobby grabbed him and yanked him in the kitchen. Over his shoulder he threw at the children: 'Go upstairs.'

They obeyed.

John took a beer from the fridge. Slowly on he started to calm down, but Bobby knew what a hothead the guy could be.

'John, the girls' parents were killed by demons,' Bobby said in a low gruff voice.

This caused John to spin around. 'Demons? How many? Where?' he asked, not even thinking about giving the girl pity.

Bobby sighed. 'I hardly think it has something to do with-,'

'It has everything to do with that! Bobby, I really think it was a demon. I have new leads. But the suckers are hard to find,' John told the older hunter. The anger had changed to excitement. Bobby was no fan of his revenge task, but he couldn't blame the man for wanting to hunt whatever killed his wife.

'Something strange is going on with that case,' Bobby confessed. He had been thinking about it from the moment he met the mother-demon.

John took his shoulders. 'You see? Tell me, what is different?'

Bobby shook his hands off, going to the fridge for an own beer. 'There were more demon possessions in this month than what is normally a year.'

John leaned at the edge of the kitchen table. 'I noticed that too.'

'The demon commanded a vamp to do its business. That is pretty hard-core strange to me,' Bobby continued.

John held his finger up. 'That actually has something to do with the case I work on now. Tell you about it in a sec. Go on.'

Bobby sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. The words of the demon rang in his head. _That kid isn't human._ No way he was telling this all-too-willing-to-kill-her hunter.

'They were after the girl for some reason. Never knew why. Said she had a boss ordering her.'

John's jaw clenched. 'Demons want to kill it, and you put it in a room with my boys?'

Bobby decided he had already said to much. Distraction was all he could bet on. John was still more interested in the thing that killed Mary than Aliza.

'Look, why don't you and I take care of two things here. We go and set out to kill the bitch. Or exorcise her. That way we can interrogate her about her Daddy-demon, and we make things safe for Aliza. Then she could go to a normal family member or foster home.'

Bobby swallowed at the thought. The girl was though, perfect to be a hunter. She could never fit in with normal kids after the horrors she had seen. But he couldn't take care of her either. Maybe he could find another hunter that wants to train her.

'Fine,' John stated. He set the empty bottle on the table and walked out the door. Bobby took another swig before following him, with a book for demon rituals and exorcism.

* * *

Aliza tried her best to calm down. Dean had been rubbing her back, holding her hands, bringing her tea and speaking soothing words all morning, but nothing really seemed to work.

Their father was so mad.

Makes sense, since she brought danger to the party. Aliza started seeing John's point of view. She didn't like it, but he was right. Dean and Sam didn't deserve to suffer because of her. They were all very new to demons, Aliza figured out. Maybe, not even Bobby could save them. Maybe they didn't even know what to do.

Later that day, Dean had found a note downstairs, saying both adults had left the house for some time. Dean worried sick. He had no idea what they were doing, or how his father would react on Bobby. Sometimes he could get very worked up…

The next morning they were woken by the engine of the Impala outside. All three jumped out of bed (partly afraid John would find them in the same bed again) and rushed downstairs. They waited in the study, standing by the window.

'I told you! You stubborn old man! That's it! I'm done!' they heard John yell when he entered the room.

John stormed into the room, spotting the three children. He walked right up to Aliza, lowering his face at her eye-level.

'What are you?' he spat at her. This tone was worse than the yelling. She could see, hear and sense the anger radiating from him. She started to shake.

'S-sorry?' She squeaked out.

That was it. The snapping point.

John took a good swing and slapped the little girl across the face.

She was so taken aback that she fell over to the ground. With one hand on her cheek, she tried to hold back the tears.

'John!' Bobby screamed, more surprised than angry.

Dean crouched over her, protecting her with his body. 'Dad! Stop it!'

John tried to yank Dean back up.

'Don't ever get near her again! She isn't human! The demons are after her, and probably for a good reason,' John snapped. It would be a matter of moments before Sam would start crying. Aliza was thinking his words over and over.

 _Demons are after her._ Never a good sign. Not even hunters know why.

 _Not safe_. The proof was her family, fallen apart.

 _Not human._

 _She's not human._

In one quick movement she got up on her feet and sprinted upstairs, past the angry Winchester.

* * *

'Aliza? Can I come in?' Dean asked at the door to the room at the attic.

No response.

'Aliza, It's okay. I will help you. Dad has cooled down. Well, for now anyway,' he half joked.

Still no response.

Dean leaned his head against the door. 'Look, I do not care. I do not even believe you're not…human. But even if you are, just know that we are still at your side. Sam, Bobby and me will never abandon you. Please just…,' He paused for a moment, letting a tear roll down his cheek. 'Let me in.'

Still nothing.

At last Dean pushed the door open. He walked inside the room. After two steps in he fell down to his knees, uttering apologizes.

He was too late.

* * *

Nancy Barton walked back to her colourful desk. Once again a child from her class had provided her with a drawing. She smiled at the fairy princess. If she would stare long enough, maybe she could forget…

But the _missing_ poster on the wall caught her eye again. She couldn't stop staring into the eyes of the innocent little girl that had disappeared some time ago, and was still not found. That maybe didn't even know her parents were…

'Miss Barton?' a small voice said.

At first she thought it was in her head. It sounded so much like…

She turned to the door. And there she was. Aliza. She stood there, in manly oversized clothes, with an old duffle bag over her shoulder and muffled hair. But that didn't hold her gaze. Her expression did.

She wasn't crying. She didn't even look sad. It even became worse when she opened her mouth and said:

'My parents are dead,' with the most emotionless voice she ever heard. It made a chill go down her back.

Nancy stood up and walked over to her nonetheless.

'Oh sweetheart! I know, I'm so sorry,' she sobbed as she hugged the girl.

Aliza hugged back. 'Me too,' she said.

They both let go. Then Aliza watched her straight in the eyes.

'I need help.'

* * *

 **That's the end of part one!**

 **This story is fixed on my OC. We will get to know her, and of course her Supernatural encounters.**

 **Currently working on part two. As you might have noticed, the name of the part (as the first one was 'family') is the main theme of the part. Each chapter will focus on another aspect though.**

 **I noticed some followers and favs, so thank you!**

 **If you like it - or not - review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Part two: lust**

 **Blue eyes**

'Alright! Good night Diana! I'll text you the details!' Sarah called after her friend.

Sarah turned around in her room. She wanted to lay down on the bed and text with Johnny for the rest of the night. That guy was so hot!

Sarah knew she was behaving like a teenage girl, rather than a twenty-two year old student. But this guy just gave her the butterflies in her stomach.

A totally different feeling settled in her stomach when she heard scratching noises coming from the only window in the room. She sat straight up in bed, holding her phone to her chest. After another long second the window creaked open and a girl climbed in with practiced skill. Sarah sighed.

'Jeez, Aliza! I'm so tired of you scaring the shit outta me! Use the damn door for once!'

Aliza landed on her insteps. Her All-star sneakers allowed her to move without a sound. Sometimes she would wear heels to class, but only for short days. She closed the window and stroked her bangs out of her face. She smiled at her friend.

'Don't be such a pussy. No killer would come through that window anyway. It's already way too easy to enter the building by the front door, so why take the trouble?' Aliza answered while walking to the little bathroom to brush her teeth.

'Thanks for making me feel safe,' Sarah said while rolling her eyes.

'And besides,' Aliza said with the brush sticking out of her mouth, 'No fool would pick on me!'

Sarah grunted in irritation. 'Aliza, please tell me you weren't there again?'

The girl spit the toothpaste out in the sink. She watched herself in the mirror. Her hair was too long for her liking, but she kept forgetting to go to a hairdresser. Her blonde hair started to have a habit of curling itself. Her eyes were as weird as usual: one bright blue, the other green-greyish. She hated that about herself. It made her realise every time that something was different about her.

But that past she tried to bury. Or part of it, anyway.

'It's my happy place,' Aliza replied while brushing her hair.

'A happy place is supposed to be a place in the woods, or even an imaginary land with castles and unicorns. Yours is dirty,' Sarah complained. Meanwhile she started texting to Johnny.

Aliza poked her head around the doorframe and gave her friend an suggestive wink.

'I like dirty.'

Sarah tried to sigh, but couldn't help the smirk forming on her face.

Aliza walked back in the main room of their student apartment. They shared a room at the campus. Most of this part was filled with girls. Aliza went out a lot with Sarah and Diana. She was quite social. But she also had her special moments.

'I am serious though. That place is no good for you,' Sarah said, putting her phone down and looking at her friend, now laying down on her bed.

Aliza turned her head. 'Sarah, I don't expect you to understand, but that place is special to me. It helps me face my problems. So please, let me.'

Sarah sighed and gave her an 'whatever' before turning away and continuing typing on her phone.

* * *

The clock on the wall ticked nervously. Aliza squinted her eyes at the noisy thing. It was already time for class to begin, but the teacher hadn't shown up yet.

The sound of books falling on the desk next to her startled her from her intense staring contest with the time. Sarah slit in the seat next to her.

'You heard? We get a new guy for this class. Seems like Mister Walby needed a 'time-out',' Sarah informed her. As sociable as Aliza was, her news and gossip source was always Sarah. She just didn't have the ear to listen to those things.

'Well, that's interesting. Maybe the new guy could manage a class full of hipsters wanting to yell their opinion on society,' Aliza said mockingly. Sarah snorted.

Then a guy walked in.

'Sorry I'm late. I needed to copy some work for this class.'

The man, still turning his back on the class, put the papers down on his desk and turned around.

Aliza was mesmerized. The new teacher was quite tall with dark hair and a neat suit with a blue tie. But most intriguing, were his eyes. They were a perfect, almost shining shade of light blue.

'Welcome everyone, to creative writing. I am Jimmy Novak, and I will be your teacher for this semester.'

His voice didn't quite match his appearance. He didn't look like a rough man, but his voice was low and dark. Aliza could only imagine him going down another octave. And a little closer to her ear…

'Today we will start with examining some short stories. Each lesson we will focus on another topic. Each week you make your own short story on the topic,' he started his lecture. He walked to his laptop and started a presentation on the beamer.

'We will start with horror,' Mr. Novak concluded.

Some people exclaimed things like 'yes' and 'dead things!', while others started whining.

On the beamer appeared the beginning of a short story. Aliza recognized it.

'Howard Philips Lovecraft. One of the best writers of horror stories. Now, read this fragment. We will discuss it in a minute or two,' Mr. Novak said.

Aliza couldn't take her eyes away from the man, not even for something good as Lovecraft.

Mr. Novak looked around at the squinting faces, trying to read the text. In the corner of his eye he spotted someone not looking in the same direction. He focused on the girl on the front row. She wasn't paying any attention to the text. Only to…him?

'What is your name?' Mr. Novak asked.

Aliza sat up straight in her chair, leaning forward to show a little cleavage. 'Aliza, Sir.'

'Aliza, why are you not reading the story? Does it bore you so quickly?'

Aliza never took her eyes of the man. God, he was gorgeous. She was never easily swept off her feet by a guy, but she just found the exception. She hungered for more attention.

'I already red it,' she said seductively.

Mr. Novak swallowed and straightened his tie without noticing he did so. She made him nervous. A little smile of victory displayed on her face.

'That's good. Then can you tell me, what the most intriguing part about this story is?' He asked her while pacing around.

Some guy in the back answered before she could. Damn hipsters with their damn strong opinions.

'The monster he described. It was the God of the fish or something? So, he worshipped some kind of old religion.'

Mr. Novak shook his head. 'Lovecraft never worshipped anything, but his own mind. And I believe I was asking the girl in the front.' He turned his attention back to her. 'You have another answer?'

'Well, what surely sticks around, is the fact that the writer kills himself at the end. To me it is always hard to tell, whether he creates a writer for each story, or whether he places himself in it.'

Mr. Novak gave her a smile. 'Very good, Aliza.' He focussed back on the class. 'And that is exactly the thing you are going to explore.'

The lesson went on and on. Aliza already had an idea or two about horror stories. Like the shapeshifter she fought last week. Some things she had left in the past, some things she still did. When she didn't have too much homework, of course.

The class ended. Aliza, for once, hated the sound of the bell, announcing the end of class. She wasn't ready to stop staring at the man in front of it. Sarah waited for her. She waved her off, saying: 'don't wait up. I'll see you at the room.' Sarah shrugged and walked away.

'Mr. Novak?' she began. He was crouched over his desk, sweeping all the papers back together. She startled him slightly, she noticed by the way he froze for a moment. Then he turned his intense gaze at her.

'Your eyes are mesmerizing,' he said without thinking. Then he tried to back out.

'I didn't mean that as a flirtation. What I mean to say is, it is unique,' he bettered himself.

Aliza gave him an honest smile.

'I wouldn't mind if it was a flirtation.'

Mr. Novak cleared his throat. 'What is it you wanted to ask?'

Aliza waited until he met her gaze again. 'Just a little question about the short story. Do I need to write in Lovecraft style, like, not really describing the monster because it would be 'too horrible to explain', or can I throw in all the sickening details?'

Mr. Novak had clearly not expected that question. He blinked a couple of times, wondering whether this sweet-looking girl really just asked him to write about nasty things.

'You…can give your own interpretation, if you like,' he answered with a little voice. Aliza thought it made him look cute, when he was confused. Damn, there was no stopping this anymore.

'I will then. I look forward to next week, Mr. Novak. See you then,' she said with a wink.

His face started to blush. She smiled even brighter at that, leaving the room.

This was fun. It was a bit like hunting.

Find a prey and take it.

And she made sure her prey would be a challenge.

* * *

 **PLOT TWIST!**

 **You didn't see that coming, did ye?** **If you did, I'll give you a cookie.**

 **So, here is part two. As the theme implies: in the coming part there will be sexual content. My personal favorite kind of stories are the ones with lots of romance and lots of smut, so that's what I'll give. But a good storyline is just as important.**

 **And I personally really care about good English...I can't say I'm good or not...because I'm Dutch. So if I continue to make a mistake you noticed, please inform me!**


	5. Chapter 5

**The two-faced woman**

Jimmy tried to stay concentrated on his work. He had a whole lot of preparing to do for the coming semester, so there was no time for distractions.

Distractions like those mesmerizing eyes. The one, pale blue, telling a fairy-tale story. The other green-greyish one, a reminder of a normal life. And not just the eyes mesmerizes him. He loved every little detail about the hot girl in his class. Her bouncy hair, her curved body, the way she smiled…

A student poked his head through the door. Jimmy had missed the knock while thinking about Aliza. His face turned red as he tried to reply to the boy his question. The student left, and Jimmy let his face fall in his hands. He tried to think of cold showers and old ladies to get rid of his erection. This was the fifth time that day already, that he caught himself sexually (and mentally) wanting the girl.

This was a problem.

* * *

'I'm not much of the going out type,' Jimmy tried telling the cheery co-worker. The teacher, Walter, had asked him to have a drink at a local place. Well, asking wound involve giving Jimmy an option. Basically he forced him to go. They walked on the pavement, going to a whole new part of town Jimmy hadn't explored yet. It was past eleven, and the air felt chilly on his skin. He pushed his hands deep in the pockets of his trench coat. He made a mental note that he really needed to get rid of the coat. There was a stench about the old thing that didn't seem to go away, no matter how often Jimmy washed the thing. But it had been a present from Amelia, so it wasn't easy to throw the thing away.

'You'll love the place,' Walter said cheerfully. He turned his face to Jimmy. 'You like women?'

Jimmy flushed a little. 'How do you mean that question?'

Walter laughed. 'I mean do you like to watch women do sexy things?'

Jimmy stopped dead on the sidewalk. 'Look, I appreciate you showing me around, but I do not go to…such a den of iniquity. God forbids it.'

Walter gave him an empty look for a moment. Then realisation hit him.

'Oh, no! Jimmy, I didn't mean a strip club! It's different, and actually a lot less sexy than that. Come on, I promise you it's nothing God forbids.'

Jimmy moved along, not quite happy about this. He already felt bad enough for the thoughts he had lately. Now he would have to add this - whatever this was going to be - up to it.

They entered a dark-looking place in a side street. Luckily the heat was on inside, so Jimmy hung his coat on the coat rack. That left him in his plain grey shirt and flannel. He dressed up in suit for school, but he didn't feel like wearing those things in his spare time.

The place was very crowded. And loud. Jimmy guessed ninety percent were middle-aged man. The other ten percent were women who looked like they wanted to be men too. The interior was looking like an old saloon: all things wood and lanterns. Only the bar looked a little newer, with coloured light behind the lines of bottles on the far wall. All the bartenders were male too. Jimmy started to wonder whether Walter had walked in the wrong place.

Then someone talked over the microphone.

'All right! Are ye all ready to welcome our new competitors? It's ladies night, so ladies, come out, come out wherever you are!' the man shouted with a thick, rusty voice. The men started to cheer and laugh and whistle. That was when Jimmy noticed the cage in the back of the place. It was a huge cage, with steel lines. It looked like a boxing place, but rougher and more dangerous.

'Tonight, our first lady is Meredith! Let's hear it up for her boys!'

A woman, twice the size of Jimmy, walked in the cage. She wore a black tank top, in which she exposed her huge rack. Her hair was short trimmed, and her eyes had dark lines around them. She shouted, and it sounded like a roar. Jimmy shivered.

Walter suddenly appeared at his side. 'Cool huh? Tonight is ladies night! I love to see 'em wrestle.'

Jimmy looked at him in disbelief. 'I'm not even sure that is a woman, let alone a lady.'

He laughed and led Jimmy to the bar. 'True that. Wait a little longer. Some of them are some nicer than big Meredith. She likes to beat the crap out of girls. Sometimes even guys.'

Jimmy looked once more at the cage, where a more womanly girl walked in the cage. Still, this woman also looked like she could eat Jimmy for breakfast. He turned away from the cage, focussing on the bartender.

Walter and Jimmy chatted for some time. Walter told him about the students he had to look out for, about the teachers he had to look out for and actually all the other people that had bad days. Jimmy was glad about the advice though, otherwise he could have made some serious mistakes. They had two beers each, to let the evening flow over.

'Auch! That is another victory for Meredith! Who would like to try it next? What lady has got the guts?' the referee yelled.

Jimmy found himself at a loss of things to ask or tell, so he tried to watch the match. Walter stood up to take a closer look, and Jimmy followed.

'Who will get in the cage with this monstrous woman?'

'I will,' a voice spoke up above the shouting. A group of men grew quiet. Then the girl walked to the opening of the cage.

'Sweetheart, we have an eighteen-plus policy here,' the referee joked. The men roared with laughter.

The girl ignored the joke and took the microphone from him.

'I know that. But did you tell Meredith? I think she heard you say 'eighty-plus,' she said with a serious voice.

The laughter broke even harder this time, some men yelling 'BURN!'.

Jimmy just stared, not believing his eyes.

'What's your name sweetheart?'

'Aliza Collins,' Aliza replied with a wink.

Jimmy was not able to move or speak. He was nailed to the ground. Aliza, the good student Aliza, got in a cage fight? What the…

'Alright ladies! Let's see some action! Three, two, one…fight!'

Meredith readied her body. She held her hands out like claws. Her jaw was clenched.

Aliza threw her vest in the corner. Now she was wearing a light blue shirt, that hugged her curves. Her hair hung around her face as she leaned forward, ready to engage or defend.

Meredith engaged first. She launched her huge form for the smaller girl. She wasn't just broader, she was also a lot taller. Just when Jimmy wanted to shout something like 'look out!' Aliza jumped out of the way, letting the other woman bang on the steel with her face. Some men laughed, others shouted for action.

Meredith turned around, were Aliza stood, ready to punch her in the face. Then again in the stomach. Then a blow to the kneecaps with her foot. All three happened within a second, before Aliza jumped back out of her reach. Meredith doubled over, but not for long. She pushed Aliza in a corner, trapping her. Aliza received a hard hit to the face. She was too late to defend.

Like it didn't affect her at all, she fell to her knees, crawling under the woman. Once at her back, she kicked Meredith in the lower back, causing her to fall face-forward to the bars once more. This angered Meredith even further. She swung herself around, trying to connect her colossal fists with Aliza's side. However, she was on time to block the punch. Then she punched right back, hitting her in the face. Meredith tried again, and Aliza repeated her earlier motion, causing her to be fine while punching the other woman over and over.

After five times Meredith tried something else. She yanked Aliza back by her long hair, forcing her to her knees. A huge arm surrounded her neck. Gasping for breath, Aliza sat there, unable to remove the arm. The referee started to count down, but Aliza wasn't ready. Tightening all her muscles, she threw the woman over her head with one movement. Meredith ended up on her face. Aliza jumped on her back, pushing the other woman's face in the ground. Meredith tried helplessly to get free, but she couldn't.

'Three, two, one…you're out! Collins wins!'

Aliza raised from the body on the floor. The referee held her hand up in the air. Aliza smiled and cheered with the men. They all shouted: 'Collins! Collins!'

'Are you ready to take on the next participant?' he asked her through the mic.

Aliza panted heavily. 'Hell yeah.'

Another woman emerged from the crowd. Jimmy looked at Walter, standing next to him, cheering for Aliza.

'That is one of my students,' Jimmy told him. Walter looked at him like he stated the obvious.

'Yeah, I know. I have her in my class for two years now. And hell, she is good. She comes here quite often. But most men here are passing through, so every time they think she is weak, because of her small form. But if I was in an ally with her, I'd rather have her on my side.'

For a moment Jimmy's mind thought about the possibilities he could do with her in an ally. He shook it away, embarrassed by his own thoughts. He just stared at the cage.

The new game began. This participant was a lot smaller than Meredith had been. But still, she looked like quite the match. Aliza didn't seem to have any problem with it. She darted away in time, and placed her punches and kicks very affectively. Clearly she had a lot of experience. It didn't settle the uneasy feeling Jimmy had.

After that match – which Aliza had obviously won – they searched for a new participant. Someone from the crowd shouted: 'How about a man?'

Aliza laughed mockingly. 'I thought my last participant was a man, considering the lack of boobs.'

They laughed at her joke.

'I say, let's find a man who thinks he can face me!' Aliza shouted.

Jimmy started to panic. He turned to Walter. 'Does she do that more often? Fighting a guy?'

Walter thought on it. 'I don't think so. Must be new for her.'

Jimmy worried even more. The man that wanted to fight her was quite the large guy. He had a lot of muscles on his arms and thighs. Aliza didn't seem too bothered. She pushed her hair back in a ponytail before facing the man. She taunted him a little before starting the fight. Other than the last two fights, this time Aliza engaged first. She hauled her arm back for a punch. But it was so obvious, that the man could block her easily. Aliza anticipated on that. She pushed her knee into his shinbone.

The man roared in pain and stumbled back. Aliza gave a naughty smirk. Jimmy couldn't help another erection, looking at this coated in sweat, teasing version of his fantasies. But that feeling was still mixed with a feeling of concern.

At one point the man punched her hard in the face. A stream of blood trickled down from her nose. She wiped it away with her hand, taking a moment. Her face became serious. She was done with the guy. She engaged the guy, side-stepping to confuse him. Then, with a steady stroke, she hit him across the chest. It made him disorientated, so that she could do a death strike with her knee in the balls.

The man yelled higher than a teenage girl. He fell down to the ground, unable to get back up. He begged for surrender. The referee held her hand up once more. This time, the guys were a little less excited, since they all felt his pain. But it only made them respect her more. After a moment they started to cheer again.

The fights were over. Aliza walked from the cage. The crowd started pouring back to the bar or outside. Some stayed to give her compliments or pats on the shoulder. None of them dared to hit her on the bottom, however.

After receiving some encouraging words, the crowd started to thin out. Someone came in her vision. Someone that caught her interest. Mr. Novak stood there, a little awkward. They had eye contact, and she spotted how pitiful he looked at her.

'Hey Mr. Novak,' she said confident.

He didn't look happy to see her. Shit.

Mr. Clayton rescued her, appearing at her side.

'Hey Aliza! Nice match!' he gave her a quick hug. 'Remind me I don't make you angry.'

Aliza rolled her eyes at him. 'Yeah, you kinda say that every time.'

Walter took a look at Jimmy, who hadn't said or moved. 'You okay?'

Jimmy didn't stop looking at Aliza. 'Can I talk to you?'

Aliza's heartrate increased. 'Sure.'

They walked outside. Aliza tugged her vest and jacket back on. It was quite cold by now. Once outside, Jimmy started talking.

'What the hell was that?' he said breathlessly. The anger was just one layer away from his voice.

Aliza shrugged and crossed her arms. 'What was what?'

'The fighting! You are such a calm, well-educated girl. What are you doing between these filthy men and women that don't even look like women?' He exclaimed while throwing his arms out.

Aliza stood there for a second. Then she calmly replied.

'One: I choose what I do. No one is the boss over me.'

'Two: being well-educated doesn't mean I can't be a fighter as well.'

'Three: Who the hell do you think you are to judge me? You act as if you know me! Newsflash: I met you a week ago!'

Aliza threw it all in his face. She saw him back up, and realising his mistakes.

'You're right. I don't know why, but I just worry about you. When I see you up there…I mean, I can see you are a good fighter. But you can still get hurt,' he said while wiping the nosebleed away with his thumb. Aliza closer her eyes for a second at the feeling of his hand on her cheek. Then she backed up.

'I'm fine,' she whispered back.

The wind gave them both the chills. Aliza hugged herself.

'Shall I bring you home?' Jimmy offered.

Aliza gave him a smirk. 'Your home or my home?'

Jimmy looked lost. He blinked a couple of times. 'uhm…I didn't mean to imply-,'

Aliza laughed and waved it off. 'Just kidding.'

She stared into the night sky. The stars were blazing bright tonight.

' _Gisa Na Mals-na Veh Ce.'_

'Sorry, what?' Jimmy asked shocked.

Aliza turned her gaze back to him. He seemed so startled. Whatever for?

'Nothing you didn't say earlier,' she shrugged.

Jimmy laughed nervously. 'I'm not even sure I can repeat you, let alone I said it earlier.'

Aliza looked at him with confusion. 'All I said was that I feel like a two-faced woman. You know, the good student and the fearless hun-….fighter,' she corrected herself. He already knew too much, and she didn't feel like needing to explain what she hunted.

'That is not what you said earlier. It didn't even sound like English…or any language I know,' Jimmy stuttered.

Aliza looked at him in disbelief. Then realization hit her like a brick wall. She took a gulp of air, now understanding his fear.

'Damn it,' she whispered under her breath. 'Not again.'

Jimmy took a step towards her. He had backed up slowly ever since she said those strange words.

'What again? What was that?' he asked softly.

Aliza didn't want to explain, but she didn't see a way out.

'Sometimes, I start talking in this weird language without knowing I'm doing it. No one could really repeat what I said, so I seriously have no idea what tongue it is, or why it happens. It's just…odd.'

She looked up at him through her eyelashes. Finding out she fought in cages was one thing, but this was a whole new level of weird. The kind of level of weird her childhood had been…

'Fascinating,' Jimmy whispered.

Aliza's eyes grew. 'Sorry, what?'

'You're fascinating,' he repeated, no shame in his words.

Aliza chuckled. 'That is the second time you give me a flirtation without intending. You better get me home before you make more mistakes.'

Jimmy gave her a crooked smile. 'No, this time it was intended.'

Then he walked down the street, to where he parked his car. Normally he wouldn't drive after two beers, but the effect seemed totally gone after all the weird things he had seen and heard tonight.

Aliza tried to stop the smile creeping on her face, but failed miserably.

What was wrong with her? All she wanted, was to flirt with him. To push him to his limits. Now she felt…a sort of connection with the guy. She didn't want to have feelings for him. She needed to stop herself.

Jimmy brought her to the campus. For a moment she wanted to kiss him goodbye, but thought better of it.

'Thank you for tonight, Jimmy,' she said with a smile.

Jimmy smiled back. 'Sleep tight, Aliza.'

* * *

 **Okay, so I just noticed that the lines I set in word disappear in this story...**

 **sorry for the confusing jumps in time! there used to be lines!**

 **When I have a little extra time, I'll update them.**

 **For the thing she says in the weird language (some of you might know which one it is), it's not a real translation. I tried to find some sort of alphabet, but it's nearly impossible. So I searched for the signs that looked most like the words I wanted to express.**


	6. Chapter 6

**The hunt**

* * *

 **Warning: this part contains sexual content**

* * *

The next class Jimmy had with Aliza, was a bit tense. He tried not to give her too much attention. These students were too focused on finding gossip, he figured afterworking here a week. He continued his lecture on Lovecraft. This time they explored the aspects of the monsters he described. Or actually, didn't describe.

Aliza was too familiar with Lovecraft, in contrast with the rest of the class. Most of the time he ended up needing to ask her for the answer. She didn't seem to mind, but she was less focused this time. She wasn't staring and flirting. Maybe he had been too bold with his statement that one night. They hadn't spoken since that moment. Only talking about Lovecraft in class, with twenty other people in the room.

When they worked in silence he allowed himself to steal glances at her. Somehow, he needed her. Alone in a room. No one else. No rules. No world around them…aaaand he did it again. Now he couldn't stand up anymore. He focused hard on the horror he was supposed to read. It helped after some time.

Then he handed all the short stories back. Some had written very good stories, some had a great way of writing. But nothing gave him the shivers quite like Aliza's story. Most had taken the style from Lovecraft: not describing the monster because it was too horrible to write about. But Aliza had given him all the nasty, creepy details on what a demon looked like, felt like and smelled like. Jimmy nearly got the feeling she had met one.

He ended up next to her, giving her the paper back. She took a look at the 'A' above the paper, before she looked up at him. This angle made her look so pretty, her eyes grotesque in her little face. Damn, he loved those eyes.

'Thank you sir,' she said.

Jimmy smiled. 'Thank you, Aliza. It was incredibly good. You gave me the chills. You have quite the new vision on demons.'

Aliza shrugged. 'I got inspiration.'

She wasn't going to elaborate, so Jimmy went back to his desk.

* * *

It was past one O'clock. Jimmy crashed down on his sofa. He rubbed his forehead, trying to erase the worry lines. He had been working all day. His brains were deep-fried. He took a chocolate bar from the table; only half was eaten last night. He ate the chocolate while thinking back at the mystery that was called Aliza.

Talking in a language no one knows, fighting like a pro and writing like she had been in the deepest circle of hell. Oh how badly he wanted to explore her. All of her. His focus fell back on a photo he had brought. A photo of his wife, Amelia, and little Claire. An enormous feeling of guilt settled over him. How could he think of another woman? Was this a test of God? If it was, he failed miserably. His feelings for Aliza crossed all the lines God had made. He was even afraid to pray tonight.

He fumbled the wrapper up and stood up to throw it away. The bag of trash by the door told him he needed to take it out. He groaned in displeasure. But if he didn't do it, he needed to hold the bag inside for a week.

While cursing the trash, he shoved back in his shoes and took the bag outside. In the alley behind his apartment he searched for the container. Suddenly he spotted it. Behind his apartment was the edge of the forest. He needed to take a path into the woods to throw the bag away.

He took a deep breath before going in the dark forest. Who thought this was a good place? Maybe the truck couldn't fit in the alley. He hated it anyway.

Then he heard a low growl. Jimmy spun around to the source of the sound. He couldn't see anything in the dark, but he was sure he had heard it. His heart beaded thrice the normal pace. He breathed heavily, so he could see the clouds in the chilly air.

Then it growled again. He let the bag fall to the ground and he started to run back. Soon the thing was on his heels. With one big leap the thing caught up. It attacked him in the back. Jimmy twisted under the snarling creature.

He expected a dog. Maybe even a wolf.

But he didn't expect what he saw. It was so horrible, his mind couldn't even comprehend what he saw. The thing attacking him, was sort of human. It had a human body, apart from the claws it had for hands, and the ugly mouth full of sharp teeth. To make things worse, it's yellow evil eyes looked straight into his fearful ones.

The thing lunged its face forward. Jimmy didn't even have time to pray. He closed his eyes, waiting for the teeth to tear away his face. Instead, he heard the swooshing of an arrow and a squeaking sound from a dying animal. Jimmy opened his eyes, to see the man-wolf laying on its side, a shiny arrow poking out of its ribs. The monster then became still.

Jimmy crawled back on his hands, needing more space between him and the monster. Then he heard footsteps behind him. He turned quickly, afraid of another attack. Instead he found a hand reaching down to him.

'Need a hand?' a familiar voice asked.

Jimmy squeezed his eyes, trying to see her face in the dark. 'Aliza?'

Aliza smiled down at him. 'Come on, before you freeze.'

He took her hand and hoisted himself up. She gave him a look-over, looking for injury. Apart from some torn clothes and some scratches he was fine. Then she turned to the monster.

'That was a close-call,' she called back at him. She set her hand around the arrow and the other against the skin. Then she yanked it out. Blood pouring down the arrow, she started to clean it with an old rag. Jimmy noticed her more than casual clothing: torn oversized jeans, a simple shirt and a thick flannel waistcoat. Her hair fell around her face from under the beanie she wore. Strapped over her back, was a tube filled with arrows. When she bend over the dead thing on the ground, he could see a silver gun on her hip.

'W-what was that?' he finally managed to say.

Aliza turned around to him. She had finished cleaning the arrow. She put the thing back in the tube with the others. Then she picked up a shovel (Jimmy had no idea where it came from, but he wasn't too sharp at the moment) and started digging in a patch of loose earth.

'A wolf,' she simply said. She dug quickly. Jimmy watched the hole becoming big enough for a person to fit in. Then she dragged the man-wolf to the hole and threw him in. Jimmy flinched when he heard the thud of the body connecting with the earth.

'That was not a wolf. It was a…person,' he said. When he talked, he felt like a mad-man.

Aliza sighed while she threw the dirt back on top of the monster.

'I have no time to explain.'

'Well, I'm not going anywhere. You have the time.'

'Fine. I do have the time, but I do not want to tell you,' she threw back without looking at him.

She finished the grave. She straightened her back, exposing her curves in the oversized clothing. Then she took a flask from her pocket and screwed it open.

'Drink,' she ordered while holding out the flask.

'What is it?'

'Water,' she said while rolling her eyes.

Jimmy trusted her and took the flask. He took a big swig, feeling like he needed it. It was water, but after he swallowed, he tasted a weird extra flavor.

Aliza came in front of him. She took his shoulders in her hands.

'Jimmy, listen to me. You were attacked by a wolf. A big, scary but normal wolf. I saved you, because I happened to have a crossbow with me. I hunt animals and stuff. It was a wolf,' she said over and over while staring in his eyes.

Jimmy listened to her. He felt very lightheaded.

'It was a wolf,' he repeated sheepishly.

Aliza cracked a smile. 'Good.'

Then she let him go. He swung a little before coming back to.

'Thank you for saving me from the wolf,' Jimmy said. The wolf was so scary. He had never seen one so up close.

Aliza patted him on the back. 'No problem. Love to be the knight on the white horse to your damsel in distress,' she joked.

It made his tension go away. Then he noticed how cold he was.

'Shall we go inside? It's freezing out here.'

Aliza pointed in another direction. 'I should go back home…,'

Jimmy grabbed her arm before she could turn away. 'Please. I'm…scared. Could you…sooth me?'

His stare was so intense, she couldn't say no.

Once back in his apartment, they sat down on the couch. Jimmy took a blanket and threw it over their legs.

'So why were you hunting at night, anyway?' Jimmy asked her.

At first Aliza thought about avoiding the question, but she could see in his gaze he only asked to distract himself.

'At day I'm afraid I run into people. When I hunt, I like to be alone. Completely alone,' she said honestly. Even though she didn't hunt deer, it was still the truth.

Jimmy nodded, but he didn't listen. Aliza rubbed his thigh on top of the blanket.

'You're tense,' she stated.

Jimmy's eyes grew. He stared from her hand to her face. Aliza continued rubbing without noticing she was going higher. Jimmy swallowed.

'You are a mystery,' he whispered.

Aliza stopped thinking from that moment on. She threw the blanket on the ground so she could straddle him on his lab. 'I might be,' she whispered husky in his ear.

'And I want to explore you,' Jimmy grunted in her shoulder.

The sound of his voice on that low tone was too much. Aliza lowered her lips to his. He engaged first in the kiss, claiming her mouth. Aliza wasn't one for going slow. So she opened her mouth and let her tongue slide over his lips. He opened his too, so their tongues could intertwine.

Jimmy rubbed her thighs. It made her crave for his hands in other places. She pulled away from his face to lift her waistcoat and shirt over her head. She was really glad she wore her red lace underwear today. Normally not her attire for hunting.

Jimmy did explore her body with his hands. He moved his mouth to her neck, sucking and kissing. She moaned loudly. A wetness started to spread in her pants. Jimmy's hands cupped her quite large breasts. His mouth licked from the front of her neck over her chest to the space between her breasts. His hands found the clasp on the back, tugging the bra away.

For a moment he looked at her exposed body. Then he rubbed at the hardening nipples.

'Don't ever stop,' she moaned on a dirty tone.

Jimmy took this as encouragement to go harder. He grabbed her breasts and circled the nipples quickly with his thumbs. His tongue ran down her belly, to the rim of her jeans. In a moment of frustration she grabbed the buttons on his shirt and undid them quickly. She pushed the shirt over his shoulders, forcing him to let go of her for a second.

It was too long for him. He attacked back at her body, pressing his closer to her. She wrapped her arms around his neck for another heated kiss. Her hands moved to his hair, stroking and pulling. He ran his fingers down her spine, making her shiver in pleasure. She broke the kiss to speak.

'Bedroom,' she ordered.

'Bedroom,' he repeated.

He picked her up on her thighs. She clung herself to his body, staring into his eyes when he walked to the bedroom. He didn't bother to close the door or windows: they were facing the forest anyway.

He threw her down on the bed and swiftly crawled over her on his hands and feet. Aliza placed her toes at the edge of his jeans, so that when he moved up to her his pants and underwear would stay behind. He disposed of them before delving in the sensitive skin of her neck. She moaned in pleasure, while her eyes rolled back in their sockets.

'Hmm, Mister Novak. Who knew you could be so naughty,' she teased.

She knew she succeeded when she felt him growing harder against her leg.

'Shut up, and do what I say,' he teased back.

Then he pushed her jeans down. He smiled at the matching lacy knickers before disposing of them too. Before he could do anything, Aliza pushed him back in the bed, now hanging over him. Both were completely naked at this point. They both panted heavily, and Jimmy adored the way her chest was moving.

'Don't you think you dominate me, Mr. Novak,' she told him, partly horny, partly serious. Like she said before: no one told her what to do.

She moved her mouth down to his nipple, sucking hard. He let out a surprised moan. She let her mouth travel over his stomach, going down. She licked shortly at his erection, teasing him with small strokes of her tongue. He moaned in protest. Then she succumbed and took all of him in her mouth. He was quite big, so she couldn't reach all around. She used her hand to do the rest. Jimmy started to moan and say random words like 'yes', 'good' and other phrases.

She let go of his cock to move back up. He looked her right in the eyes, taking her face in his hands.

'You are so beautiful,' he told her honestly. She smiled a little shyly.

Then he made her sit up on her knees. He moved himself as close as he could, breathing in her neck.

'Now, let's make sure you are wet enough,' he whispered.

Without another warning he pushed three fingers into her pussy. She gave a loud shriek, not expecting the motion. He pumped in and out, hitting that sensitive spot. After some time she started to feel her climax coming.

'Damn, Jimmy. Get inside me before I come.'

He laughed at his victory. He moved to his night drawer, taking out a condom. He put it on swiftly and laid back down in the cushions.

Aliza moved herself above him, ready for him to enter. He took hold on her hips and thrust himself in at once. Aliza groaned loudly. Damn the neighbors. After the pain settled down, the pleasure started to rise. He moved, first little, but making his motion bigger each time. Before she knew it she was riding him hard. They were both panting hard and loud, exclaiming words of ecstasy.

'Come closer,' Aliza told him.

Jimmy sat up, letting her wrap her legs around his back. There, in his lab, he started pumping again. With a view of her breasts jumping up and down and the sound of her heavy breathing, Jimmy came. Knowing Aliza would need a little more encouragement, he placed his finger on her clit, continuing to please her. With one more thrust she came too.

They fell down on the bed. Aliza laid on her stomach, Jimmy on his back. They continued panting for some time. Then the cold settled back over them, and he reached for the blankets. He covered her and himself, turned to her. Aliza had her eyes closed. He played with her hair between his fingers.

'You should get an additional 'A' for that,' he joked.

Aliza laughed in the cushions. 'Shut up.'

They fell asleep together.


	7. Chapter 7

**Careless**

The Monday after the weekend was a good day for Aliza. She strolled through the halls of the school with confidence. She wouldn't tell anyone she slept with a teacher, but she wanted them to notice some form of victory over her.

Yes, she felt good. Felt good because she had succeeded her hunt. Killing werewolves apparently wasn't the only hunt she was good at.

But as the day rolled by, that feeling started to disappear. The hunt had been fun, but now she had what she wanted. She just didn't know what to do with it now.

Thinking she would figure that out along the way, she set her mind to something else. She dialed the number on her phone, smiling at the memory of his work.

' _How could I be at your service today, my sweet lady?'_

'Stop flirting. This hunter/witch thing is not gonna happen,' she told him with a fond smile.

' _I prefer warlock. And let a man dream,'_ he replied with his husky voice.

Aliza rolled her eyes. 'Whatever. Magnus I just called to tell you the potion worked. I bet against it, but it worked. Now I owe you one.'

He made some approving noises. ' _And in what unfortunate event did you need to alter someone's memories?'_

Aliza swallowed. She didn't know why, but it was really hard to lie to the guy. They had some complicated history, involving a battle that nearly ended in both their deaths, when they called it a truce and lived with each other.

'A guy I know saw a werewolf.'

' _A guy you know, or a guy whose body you know, inch by inch?'_ Magnus teased.

Aliza rubbed her brows. 'Go to hell, idjit.'

Magnus chuckled. ' _Been there, done that. You know I know you too well. I can hear you're trying to hold something back.'_

'You watch your tone with me, witch. That I like you doesn't mean I can't put you down if you annoy me,' she threatened. She knew it was in vain, since she wasn't going back to New York to kick his ass. Plus, they were still pretty even matches, so they might end up at the same point as before.

' _So you did sleep with the guy?'_ Magnus teased, ignoring her threat.

Aliza leaned back against the pillar. She was on the square on the college ground. A soft rain started to fall down. With a deep sigh, and through gritted teeth she replied: 'Yes.'

Magnus laughed out loud at the other side of the line.

'I hate you,' Aliza told him.

´ _No you love me. Nice job sweetie. We aren't so different, you know.'_

'Say that again when I start carrying hex bags around.'

' _Whatever you like to hear. I need to go. But I will definitely take you up on that one time. Let me know when you are around again. Don't do anything I wouldn't do!'_

Then the call ended. Aliza smiled in herself for a moment. The thing she had with Magnus, was a true love/hate relationship. They never actually got in a relationship. They didn't even kiss. But there sure as hell was sexual tension between the two. Both liked to explore their limits with one-night-stands. It almost became a competition.

That stopped her in her track.

Was Jimmy a one-night-stand? A competition?

She bit her lip, already knowing the answer.

* * *

'Aliza, wait up!' Sarah yelled after her.

Aliza turned around. Sarah was half running, as well as she could on her heels. Some people in the hallway looked at her with judging eyes. What was it with this place and judging people?

'You need to read this. I wrote it last night. I suddenly had inspiration,' she proudly told her friend.

Aliza took the papers from her and started to read the first part. Her eyes scanned the words quickly but carefully.

'Damn Sarah, this is freakin' good!' she fondly told her friend.

Sarah waved the compliment away. 'Look, you need to do something for me. Johnny asked me to go out with him this afternoon.'

Aliza smiled. 'That's great!'

'Yeah it is,' she said a little dreamy. 'But look, I need to hand this in. My last version was crap.'

Aliza held her breath. She knew what she was going to ask.

'Would you bring this to Mr. Novak? He likes you so much, I bet he is willing to grade this one instead of the last version. Would you do that? I really need to go, Johnny is waiting.'

She clasped her hands together. Aliza stared at her for a moment. Then she shook herself from her thoughts. 'Sure,' she replied with a fake smile.

Sarah hugged her quickly. 'I love you. See you tonight!'

Aliza chuckled. 'Yeah, or not. Have fun.'

Sarah ran away. Aliza took another look at the paper. This deserved to be graded. She would put her shame aside to help her friend.

She could always keep it casual.

* * *

Aliza failed at keeping it casual.

She stood at the door to the classroom, shaking like a leaf. This was nothing for her. She was a fierce fighter. A hunter. And here she stood, nervous as hell.

What was she nervous about? About talking about their night? She had left the apartment before Jimmy woke up that morning. She hated sticking around, doing the romantic stuff.

She was mostly ashamed, she determined. Ashamed because she used him. She didn't love the guy, or wanted a relationship. It was just the thrill. And his good looks, because damn, he had good looks.

The class ended. The door opened to let the stream of students out. A couple of them said hi, asking her who she was waiting for. She shook the paper, telling them it was for Sarah. The woman of topic became their focus point, letting Aliza alone.

Then she had to walk in. Jimmy was sitting at his desk, looking at some papers.

'Mister Novak?' she said softly, while knocking on the door.

His head snapped up. His eyes displayed a moment of fear, before becoming soft. He gave her a warm smile.

'Aliza, come in. Please close the door,' he told her. He was calmer than her.

Aliza did as he told her and moved to his desk. He sat at the edge of the desk.

'What can I help you with?' he asked on a lower tone.

Aliza swallowed and held the paper up, surprising Jimmy. He took the paper from her.

'Sarah had an inspirational moment last night. She wanted to hand this version in instead of the other.'

He flipped through the pages, mildly interested in its content.

'And the reason you bring me this instead of her is…?'

Aliza looked away. 'She is busy.'

Jimmy looked up at her through his eyelashes. She tried very hard to keep her distance, but standing here with him in one room, made her want to do their activities all over again.

'I will take a look at it. You can tell her I appreciate her taking a second look, but next time she better comes herself,' Jimmy said, totally sounding like the teacher.

Then he dropped that act and became more familiar. He brushed his fingertips over her arm. A line of goose bumps followed his track.

'How are you?' he simply asked, his gaze on his hand.

She swallowed before answering. 'I'm fine.'

He looked up at her. His eyebrows scrunched together, and it looked adorable.

'Why did you leave? I could have made you breakfast,' he said with a little voice. He sounded hurt.

'I didn't want to give you the wrong impression,' she told him.

He raised an eyebrow, so she sighed and explained.

'Look, Mr. Novak-,' Jimmy interrupted her. 'Please drop that when we are alone. Just Jimmy.'

'Jimmy, I don't want you to think I want a…relationship. I like you, but I only feel sexually attracted to you.'

Jimmy chuckled. 'So, you're saying you wanted to find out whether you could screw the teacher?'

Aliza gaped like a fish. 'No, no! You're not just a teacher. You are…sweet. I really appreciated the concern you had for me at the bar.' She sighed and closed her eyes. 'It's really not you. I am just not that kind of girl.'

Jimmy pushed himself back to his feet. He stood inches away from her. His face hung in front of hers.

'You are more the kind of girl that likes to be naughty,' he whispered in her ear.

A moan escaped her mouth. She gasped at her own sound. She felt Jimmy's face crinkle with lines of laughter. He ran the hand that didn't rest on her arm go around her to run across her spine. She arched her body into his at the touch.

'Jimmy,' she breathed.

She wanted to tell him to stop. Well, didn't want, but needed to. She didn't want to hurt him.

Then his hand arrived at her bottom, cupping her. She bit her lip before she could moan again.

She needed to stop.

Jimmy moved his face back in front of hers, and started kissing her neck, her ear, her cheek.

To hell with caring. She would stop caring.

She grabbed his face in her hands. 'Come here you,' she grunted in irritation. Then she crashed her lips against his. Jimmy stopped going slow from that moment on. He moved his hands through her hair, across her back. Aliza tugged with one hand on his short hair, ruffling it the best she could. Jimmy would let out some moans during their heated kiss.

Then she felt his hand slip in her pants. The pants gave him enough space to cup her from the front. He pushed two fingers in her already wet pussy. She moaned in his mouth at the feeling.

'Gosh Jimmy. We're still in a classroom,' she managed to remember.

Jimmy smiled down at her. He retrieved his hand, which made her feel untouched.

'Yes we are. I'm the teacher, and you just did a really bad thing. You should be punished.'

Aliza's eyes grew. Instead of worrying, it only turned him on. But that was a quick thought, because it did the same to her.

Jimmy pushed her to his desk, bending her over. Aliza's palms hit the hard desk. She shoved some papers out of the way before she would slip on them. Before she could say a thing, her pants and knickers were at her ankles. She gasped at the cold air brushing her private parts. Jimmy zipped his pants open and let those drop to the ground too.

Aliza had done some dirty things in her life. Once she had sex in a car. Another time she had asked the roommate of the guy she was banging to join them. She liked to flirt and dress scarcely from time to time. But being fucked from behind, by a teacher, in a classroom…that was a new level.

Jimmy pushed her legs further apart and arched her back. She felt vulnerable this way. But it was also very hot. Then she felt him entering her from that weird angle. She wanted to cry out, but muffled her sounds by biting her lip. Jimmy entered her fully, reminding her how long his cock was. A single tear of pain left her eye, but that was it. Then it was pleasure and the enormous thrill she felt.

'Quicker,' she groaned.

Jimmy took her hips in a strong grip. Then he did as she said, moving quicker, totally in and out. Aliza let some soft moans escape her mouth, careful not to be too loud. Jimmy started to breath harder behind her. He found himself in a rhythm, so he could bend further over her. He moved his mouth to her neck.

'You were right. You are not the nice girl, wanting a relationship. You are the naughty one, wanting to be punished for her behavior. Right?' He said on a low tone.

Aliza found herself terribly turned on by his voice and words. 'Yes,' she replied.

Then he smacked her bottom. Aliza couldn't help the moan escaping her. Then he hit again. He spanked her hard. Aliza's eyes rolled back in their sockets. She didn't even know it was such a turn on for her. When her bottom started to get red, Jimmy moved his hands under her shirt, tugging her bra loose. He cupped her breasts, massaging them on the rhythm of his thrusts in her.

One of the students realized he had left his notebook in the classroom. He opened the door, and when he could see through it, he shut it just as quickly. His eyes were still wide open. Had he really just seen that? The sweet Aliza being taken from the back by Mister Novak? The loud moan from the classroom indicated it was real. He swallowed. He needed to report this. How could he not? Maybe Aliza didn't even want it. Maybe he raped her.

He needed to report this.

Aliza couldn't help the loud moan when she reached her climax. Jimmy enjoyed her sound so much she felt him come too. They took a moment to catch their breaths before he moved out of her, retrieving his pants. She hoisted her pants up too.

'Damn that was hot,' she said with a chuckle. Jimmy laughed too. Then he cupped her face with his hands.

'You're hot,' he replied with that low tone. Then he kissed her quickly on her lips.

Aliza straightened her clothes and hair before walking to the door.

'Don't you forget to grade Sarah's work,' she lectured.

She heard a soft chuckle when she closed the door behind her.

* * *

Aliza didn't know whether to be mad or proud at herself. She contemplated what was important, what she would do from now on and how to behave, as she sat on her bed, legs crossed. She held a notebook, trying to write down some ideas. But the thing lied forgotten in her lap for over an hour now.

On the one hand, she was mad at herself. She walked through that classroom door with no intention to go further with Jimmy. He was a good man, even a Christian, she had figured out. She was only a slutty student that gave him some entertainment. Or, was he her slutty teacher? They used each other equally selfishly, she decided in the end.

On the other hand: why was it so bad? Sure, he had sinned in the face of God. But she didn't care about someone else's judgement. She never had, and never did. It might be a sin, but it's not illegal or dangerous or anything. Only dangerous if a monster she would hunt would find out she had a weak spot. But that wouldn't be a problem, if they kept their 'interaction' a secret from the world, anyway.

The next day she still hadn't really decided how she felt about the whole thing. Mindless she walked to her first class. She walked through the door, and her senses were back in the here and now.

Something odd was going on. Most stopped talking as she walked in. Others continued on low tones. One girl in the back even laughed out loud.

So this is what it must feel like to be bullied. However, Aliza wasn't one to let people walk over her.

'What, do I have a "kick me" note on by back or something?' she snapped at the judging people.

They gave little attention to her words, but at least the staring stopped partly. She sat down next to Sarah. Sarah looked uneasy. She shifted in her seat and tapped her pen against the desk.

'What the hell is going on?' Aliza asked Sarah, quite irritated by now. She pushed her hair back behind her ear.

Sarah looked at her from the corner of her eyes, almost afraid to see her. Or…been seen _with_ her?

She was about to answer, when a stern voice caught Aliza's attention.

'Aliza Collins,' the head-mistress of the college called out, 'please come with me.'

Aliza looked at the woman. Normally she would have a kind settlement over herself. Now she looked like the teacher from the movie Matilda.

Aliza grabbed her bag and followed the woman. She didn't speak on their way to her office. Once there, they both sat down. For once, Aliza did feel nervous about others their opinion.

'Aliza,' she started, clearly not happy she had to do this, 'you are a good student. I hear only positive things about you from the teachers. You have had some warnings last year though. I don't think I need to point those out again.'

Aliza thought back. She had a warning for going in an over-the-top discussion with a teacher. She had become so angry that she had thrown a chair at the man. She was right though. She simply couldn't stand injustice.

The other warnings had mostly been for teachers who visited the fighting bar one day. They would all be startled to see her, get mad, and tell the head-mistress. She did by far know about the fighting, but couldn't do something about it, since it was outside of school time. Aliza never understood why those teachers were so set on punishing her for her hobby. Or lifestyle really.

She simply nodded for her to go on.

'But this is a whole new level for you. Now, I need to ask you this first, before I judge you,' she said uneasily. Aliza swallowed thickly. She bend over her desk to stare Aliza straight in the eyes.

'Did Mr. Novak force you to do sexual actions with him?'

Aliza was taken aback. She just stared at her with big, round eyes.

 _How?_

 _How did they find out?_

 _God, the classroom thing was a bad idea!_

But she had to be honest. Maybe she could safe him from being fired.

'No.'

The woman raised one eyebrow. 'No?'

Aliza answered without blinking. 'No, he did not force me. It was a mutual action.'

She stared a little longer at Aliza, weighting her words for the truth. Then she sighed and leaned back in her chair. She took off her glasses and stared out the window.

'Aliza, this is official your last warning. You should be aware that this goes way beyond our rules. It is that you-,'

'Is it?' Aliza asked.

She turned her attention back to Aliza. 'Sorry?'

'Is it beyond the rules? Are these written down? And what if I told you it was love? Would you forbid love? My love and sex life is none of your concern-,'

'Enough!' she yelled to interrupt the twenty-two year old girl.

'I've had enough of you! You should be happy you aren't kicked from this school! This is your final warning! One more mistake, no matter how small, and you're out. Do you understand?'

Aliza was tired of the conversation anyway. It was the same as the teacher she threw a chair at: when someone with authority over her was wrong, they got angry with her. Like they had any right to. She had hoped that would be over after high school, but it still seemed to follow her. Maybe she better got kicked out. She could always do the hunter life, although she made a promise she would get a real job, and hunt.

'Yes,' she replied without emotion.

'Then get out,' the woman told her.

Aliza was already at the door, but she had to ask one last thing. 'What happens to Jimmy?'

She sighed at her familiarity with the teacher. 'Mr. Novak will be fired on the spot.'

Aliza left the room.

* * *

Aliza had been careless. And that had cost her everything.

Her reputation was ruined. Most seemed disgusted by her as she walked by. No one greeted her, or invited her to a party anymore.

Her friendships were dead too. It wasn't like Sarah was a friend for life, but Aliza had liked her simple comments and complaints. She made her feel like she was a normal girl, from time to time. But as Sarah spotted her walking down the hall, she turned and fled.

The teachers that had respect for her once, could only shake their heads at her.

She had ruined her own life. No blame on Jimmy. If it wasn't for her flirting, Jimmy would never have indulged in sex with her.

This life wasn't a life anymore. She had to finish the year: she was so close to getting a degree. Five more months and she could leave and never see any of these people again. And that was the goal she set in her head. The thing she reminded to herself, every time someone would look disgusted at her. She reminded herself of it when Sarah asked to get another room, leaving Aliza alone. She reminded herself when her social life was so broken, there was literally no one left to talk to her. She had no family left she talked with. There was literally no one.

The only good things coming from that, were the beautiful stories she could write, and the privacy for her hunting trips.

She hadn't spoken with Jimmy. He had left town two days after they were discovered. She didn't want to talk to him. She felt sorry, but it was as much his mistake as hers. He seemed to see it the same way, since he never showed up to talk to her.

And that was the last time she would so carelessly give in to lust.

* * *

 **End of part two!**

 **Well, is it interesting already? ;)**

 **The warlock she talks with, Magnus, is based of the character from the Mortal Instruments, might any of you read those books and be like: waaaait...**

 **So, this story basically turns 360 degrees in each part. But do not worry, the Winchesters will be back soon!**

 **Thanks for my reviewers! You guys rock!**

 **p.s. I updated the first chapters with the lines in between. So I hope they are easier to follow now. If you read it with the lines: you didn't see anything.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Part three: anger**

 **Survival**

' _The new book, from the series "hunters" is out. Once again Collins delves in the thoughts of the boring main character Gina, who adds nothing new to the world of Supernatural books. It's amazing how many of these books still sell. "Hunters" could only be good for mindless entertainment,'_ Aliza mockingly quoted the review in the newspaper.

Harry rubbed his temples. 'Not again. Can't the guy leave you alone?'

Aliza waved the newspaper dramatically in the air, as she paced round the booth in the café.

'I know right! You tell him you don't want an one-night-stand, and suddenly all he does is personally attacking me! He is such an asshole!'

Aliza fell down on the opposite side of the booth from Harry. She thought back on the past events.

As one of the few exceptions in the world, she did become a writer after finishing her degree of creative writing. Those last years were though for Aliza. She had little to none social contact. However, those lonely Friday nights did give her the opportunity to write more. Maybe she should thank the people that let her down, since it brought her where she ended up.

Seven years later, after she started writing her hunter stories down and brought them out in novels, her life had taken a new turn. Many people had asked for her attention, but few of them wanted to really know her. Her only real friend was Harry. Harry had started talking to her on her first fancy party with writers and publishers. She felt terribly awkward back then, knowing no one. Harry had picked up a conversation with her. She liked the guy, since he was a bit of an outsider like herself. They had been good friends since.

The way to where she stood now, wasn't easy though. Back in the beginning nobody knew who she was. She didn't mind the life where her books were famous, but she was out of the picture. Unfortunately, lately she started to get recognized on the streets. And not just by fans, also by producers and other writers. Those were the kind of people that tried to lift on her success.

A good example for that, was Paul.

A first-class dick who only stuck around for her success and her looks. In the beginning he seemed nice and interested, but that was all an illusion.

'Don't take it personally, he can't handle your brilliance. Or your damn hot looks,' Harry told her with that attitude of his. She snorted at his compliments, but deep down she really liked them. He was the only one who told her she was pretty, or smart. Too bad he was gay.

Aliza leaned heavily on her hand. She blew some strings of hair from her face. Her long wavy blonde hair had become one of her style-icons and one of the things she loved most about herself. She still hadn't settled with her eyes, though. They would simply never get along, like her eyes didn't get along with each other.

'I'm not taking anything personally from him. But a bad review is a bad review. What if people take the douchebag seriously?' she complained.

'Then they're idiots who better not read your work. They wouldn't fit in with the fan-base anyway,' Harry said matter-of-factly, waving his hand around in the air.

Aliza pushed herself back in the backseat of the booth. 'They don't know he is a douche.'

Harry pushed the newspaper across the table. 'Sweetie! Just look at the others! Twenty-three positive reviews, against one false one. Believe me, if those people reading this have eyes, they will know your books are awesome.'

Aliza glanced down at the reviews she had already read before Harry arrived in their favorite café. This was the place they would meet every week to tell each other about the new things in their lives. Harry worked at the biggest producing company in the state. He loved to share the new-arrivals with Aliza, who would, on her turn, check out the good stuff. She loved to read from other writers, mostly the new rising talents. She was one of them, and she loved all the feedback she could get. So she decided to do the same for others too.

She sighed. 'You're right.'

Harry pretended to flip his hair. 'And you know it.'

Aliza chuckled at his dramatic behavior. He knew she hated diva behavior, but he liked to test his limits from time to time. Once, she did get really pissed, when he pretended to be drunk to impress some guy at the bar. He wasn't a normal human being anymore, and Aliza had knocked hard on his head, waking him up.

From that moment on, he never pretended to be drunk again.

Harry took a sip from his coffee. Then he said:

'How is the new story coming?'

'I have just finished the last one,' Aliza complained.

'You know how this business works, don't you?' he warned.

Aliza blew out some air. 'Yeah, of course. I wouldn't be standing anymore if I didn't know. I'll continue writing when I get home.'

Harry shoved his empty cup across the table. 'Well, let's get you started then.'

* * *

' _You better get the hell off that person, or I'll kill you myself!'_

' _And what is it you are going to do about it, little girl?'_

 _Gina turned back to George, looking for some help. She looked him deep in the eyes an-_

'Oh my god I'm writing freaking Twilight!' Aliza screamed out in frustration. She tangled her fingers in her hair, pulling on the ends. Nothing she was writing turned out right. She was still so angry with Paul. She needed some distraction if she wanted to continue.

She took a stroll around her living room. Once again she admired how wonderful her house was. It was placed just outside of town, in a nature-rich area. The house was painted from the in- and outside in light brown, natural colors. One side of the house, facing the forest, was completely made out of glass. Her living room had a high ceiling, which gave an enormous look about the room, with lots of light.

Basically, she found her dream house.

She stood in the kitchen with a glass of water, enjoying the view. Her best way of getting distraction, and inspiration, had always been hunting. She hungered for letting some vamp heads roll. She hungered to release her aggression. But that was the worst moment you could pick to start hunting. She would be so anger-driven that she would lose her head. Literally.

Suddenly, she felt a strange feeling. I was like a chill going down her spine, at the same time you get that nervous feeling you get before you need to speak up for a crowd. And then a wave of nausea.

Aliza smiled. She never stopped looking out the window. There was no need.

'What the-,' a very dark voice spoke from the living room.

'You're trapped darling,' Aliza called out. Then she finally turned her head to look at the intruder. This was a new one. She had seen hundreds, maybe even thousands in her live. But this one had a different feeling about himself. Aliza was cautious. But still, this was exactly the kind of distraction she needed.

'No need for you to check the floor or ceiling for devil traps. I made a new one. No use to fight it,' Aliza told him as she walked up to him. He was, as a matter of fact, checking the ceiling at that moment. He stopped and looked Aliza straight in the eye. Then he gave her a devilish smile.

'Oh well, I guess I should have expected it, darling,' he told her in that same dark voice.

Aliza leaned against the kitchen counter as she studied the demon.

'Never seen you before,' she stated, not looking him in the eye.

He gave a dark chuckle. 'My sources tell me no one comes back from you alive. So you don't really see us twice, do you now?'

Aliza snorted. 'Fair point. Sources? You're some kind of leader?'

The man, who was a little shorter than Aliza, bowed in a fashionable manner.

'Pleasure to meet you. Crowley, king of the crossroads.'

Aliza scrunched her face up. 'Hmm. That supposed to mean something? It doesn't ring any bells.'

In her head, she did actually hear a little alarm bell, telling her this guy was probably stronger than the others. She would test that later, with her demon-torture instruments.

Crowley looked annoyed at her reply. 'I'm here to help you.'

At that, Aliza threw her head back and laughed out loud. 'Yeah right! Just like all your minions did! Trust me, demon, I'm not making any deals with your kind. Not even with the king.'

Crowley didn't seem defeated. Not at all. He had a shimmer in his eye, telling her he had some information she didn't know. Aliza itched to ask him.

'Not even if I can tell you what you really are?' he told her with a suggestive smirk.

At that, Aliza was taken aback. She took a moment to let his words sink in.

'You're bluffing.'

'Are you sure? Any other horse you could bet on?'

Aliza swallowed thickly. She turned around to put the glass back on the counter. She took a moment to compose herself. What if he did know? What if he could tell her? But then, what would change? So she would have a name. Did that matter?

She turned back around, facing the king of the crossroads.

'Not worth my soul, sweetie,' she replied while crossing her arms over her chest.

Crowley circled the space he had. He figured out the space was limited to one step in all directions. He clenched his jaw as he did so, annoyed by the turn of events.

'It wouldn't cost you your soul. What if, we agree on you letting me out of this trap, and leaving me alone. I don't like you 'hunters' and I don't want you on my ass,' he said.

That rang her bells. That easy a deal? There was a catch here. A demon, most of all the king, would never agree on a little privacy.

'What's your deal, Crowley?'

Crowley turned back to her, surprised by her response. 'What?'

Aliza clicked some things together in her head. 'You want to know, don't you.'

Crowley didn't respond, so Aliza continued. 'You want to know what I am. You make it look like it is my end of the deal, but it's yours. You want to know what I am,' she told him.

Crowley stared at her. Then he closed his eyes and sighed. 'For hell's sake. Alright, fine. You're right. I am so curious about what kind of abomination you are. Something so hideous that even demons want to kill you.'

Aliza shuddered at him calling her an abomination. She hadn't even considered something like that. What if she was even worse than a demon? But why didn't she have a desire to kill half of town, if she was some kind of monster?

'We still make a deal,' Aliza replied. 'You get to do whatever you need to do to find out what I am. In exchange, I want _you_ of _my_ ass. No demons, nothing hell related. You know what? Nothing hell related can chase of hurt me. You wanna know why?'

She took some steps closer, until she was inches away from the demon. She stroked one finger over his chest.

'I'm dying to know,' Crowley responded sarcastically.

Aliza smirked. 'You will protect me. My personal guard dog,' she said with a smile.

Crowley looked away. 'You're a hunter. You seek things that try to kill you.'

Aliza took a step back and started circling him. 'I didn't say all monsters. Vamps, ghosts and others I can handle myself. But no demons, no hell hounds. And no you. What do you think? How badly do you want to know what I am?'

Crowley cursed under his breath, hating his position.

'Going once,' Aliza pressed.

Crowley looked at her, searching for some pity.

'Going twice…,'

'Going…,'

'Alright! Fine,' Crowley yelled in frustration.

Aliza gave him an evil smirk. This was even better than cutting him to pieces. She gladly came up to him.

'To seal the deal-,' Crowley started.

'I know,' she said quickly before gripping his lapels and pressing her lips to his. The kiss held nothing romantically, just the eagerness of both to get their share.

They released and Aliza took a step back. Crowley held his hands up, hopelessly.

'Are you letting me out of whatever trap you made?'

'We never discussed that,' she stated.

Before Crowley could come up with a response she continued with: 'But I'll free you, as a sign of good faith. You wouldn't make a good coat rack, anyway. Too short.'

Aliza whispered a spell under her breath, holding her hand for her mouth so Crowley couldn't read her lips. Crowley felt the power reduce, and he took a step to prove his freedom.

'You a witch now?' he asked uninterested as he flexed his muscles.

'Nope. Just picked some things up from one,' she told him honestly. No need to tell him Magnus was actually one of her only friends.

'Well, let's get started then, shall we?' Crowley said, some of his charisma returning.

Aliza held her hands up. 'What is it you need to do? Or I need to do?'

Crowley walked to one of the comfy chairs in the living room, looking out over the forest.

'You just sit there and look pretty. I'll do the dirty work.'

Aliza raised an eyebrow at his strange terms. Nonetheless, she walked over to the chair and sat down. Crowley moved down to meet her at eye-level.

'Now, this might hurt a bit,' he told her with a smile that told her it was going to be more than 'a bit'.

Then, in one swift motion, he pushed his arm into her chest. Her eyes and mouth popped open. For a moment she thought he had reached through her flesh and squeezed her heart. Instead, a strange light erupted from her own chest. She could feel her veins burning all over her body. She screamed out, but even if she would die, no one could hear her. The disadvantage of living remote.

It did hurt like hell. She wanted it to stop. She looked at Crowley, who seemed to concentrate on whatever he was doing. She needed it to stop.

Now!

And then a blinding light erupted from her chest and Crowley was smashed in the far wall. She panted heavily and doubled over out of the chair. She was displayed over the wooden floor. She looked up at the disorientated demon across the room. She looked at him, hoping he would pervade her with the information. For a moment she realized she never included him telling her the outcome in the deal. Stupid her.

'Well, that explains a lot,' Crowley panted. Then he pushed himself to his feet and smoothed his clothing. He walked over to the weak girl on the floor.

Not bothering herself with the pure exhaustion she felt, she pushed herself in a sitting position. She leaned against the chair.

'W-what?' she asked.

Crowley seemed to notice her fear of not being told. For some reason, he decided to tell her anyway.

'Demons aren't your biggest problem,' he started. Then he moved down to face her.

'Angels are the ones you should look out for,' he told her. She could swear she heard some fear in his voice.

It chilled her to the bone. She had discovered more and more about angels in the last year, since they appeared more often. There were some rumors about Lucifer breaking out of hell, and the angels trying to stop him. She hadn't believed it so far – or hadn't wanted to believe it – but now she did.

And now she knew that those beings of pure goodness wanted her dead.

'What…am I?' she asked, afraid of the answer.

Crowley looked at her for a long moment.

'They are called Nephilim. The offspring of an angel and a human.'

Aliza's eyes grew wide as she took the words in, needing to repeat themselves to believe them.

'But my parents…,'

'Seems like daddy wasn't quite himself at the time you were produced. You have one bad mommy,' he said mockingly.

Aliza listened with half an ear. She zoned out, staring in the distance.

A Nephilim.

Her father wasn't her father. An angel had used him as a vessel. Her father possessed by an angel, her mother by a demon.

She really wasn't human.

Angels wanted her dead. She knew why. She was a disgrace.

An abomination.

She wanted to ask more, but as she looked back up, Crowley had disappeared.

Hell was off her ass for now.

Heaven was on it, the moment she would appear on their radar.


	9. Chapter 9

**Living up to expectations**

 _A Nephilim is a creature with the physical abilities of a human being, in which some abilities are strengthened by the grace of an angel. A Nephilim is born from the combined DNA of a human and an angel. Part of the inheritance of their Angel parent, the Nephilim will be born with the knowledge of the Book of Enoch. This means they can talk in the old Enochian language. Without the proper education however, the Nephilim will not master the language, but rather happen to know it's contend._

 _Angels are not supposed or allowed to intercede with a human being. Therefore, a Nephilim is a disgrace to heaven. Angels of the lord will need to destroy the Nephilim if they encounter one. The Nephilim is also a disgrace to earth. It is not human, therefore it wasn't supposed to have a place on the Earth God created. Humans cannot understand and comprehend with the abilities of a Nephilim. Therefore, humans must serve God and attempt to destroy the creature._

 _Even the abominations from Hell, demons and sorts, will attempt to murder the Nephilim. They will not do this out of loyalty for God, but rather for the sense they feel with the Nephilim. They can sense that the Nephilim is even more despised that its own being, therefore they have the need to destroy it._

 _Nephilim are extremely dangerous. Not only do they have the warrior mentality of an Angel, which will make them fierce soldiers without a leader or course, but they have no control over the emotion anger. In the childhood of the Nephilim this will not show clearly, but as the creature reaches adulthood, it will continue to grow angrier. Nephilim are not able to control themselves when they reach the state of intense fury. This is recognizable by the eyes turning a complete and devilish white. In this state, the Nephilim will destroy everything. Every Nephilim will kill humans, at one point in their existence._

* * *

Aliza tried to remember all the things she knew about Nephilim. It was hard to concentrate with all her emotions floating around. Some things she couldn't remember clearly. But the part about the anger building up, that she knew for sure. So she was doomed to become a hothead, with a possibility of killing someone. That didn't help her emotions to settle down.

Her house was too small for her in this state. She had called Harry and hung up before he could answer. She wanted to talk to someone, but reminded herself that she couldn't. What would she say? 'Hey Harry, just figured out my daddy was an angel, and now I am a creature worse than demon scum!'

She ended up driving up to the city. She took a long stroll down the streets, but found it all too crowded. All these people, not knowing what she is or will be. But what _if_ they knew? They would despise her. Like the angry mob chased down Frankenstein…

Without even realizing, her feet carried her to her favorite café. It was very quiet inside, so she decided to take the little comfort she could find. She walked in without greeting Richard, the bartender. He followed her with his eyes, reading her frustration. Aliza settled down in one of the booths at the window. She placed her elbows on the table and let her face disappear in her hands. She didn't want to face the world anymore.

Aliza sat there quietly for a good 30 minutes. Richard left her alone, knowing she wasn't here for the food. She was quiet on the outside, but in her head everything screamed at her. Voices telling her to embrace what she was, voices telling her to try and find a cure, voices telling her to find her true angel dad, voices telling her to kill herself while there was still no harm done…

'Knew I would find you here,' someone said beside her. Aliza still had her head in her hands – she hadn't moved at all – so she couldn't see her visitor. But she didn't have to.

'Please go away Harry,' she breathed. She tried not to sound too harsh, even though she felt like shouting at him.

Harry never listened. He sat down opposite her.

'Look, everyone has trouble with writing every now and then. Don't think this will last…'

'Oh for God's sake! This isn't about writing you moron!' Aliza spoke up when she finally lifted her head. Tears had dried on her cheeks, making her hair stick. She was flushed with the crying and the anger. She breathed heavily through her nose.

Harry looked at her in complete astonishment. He blinked a couple of times before answering.

'Then what? Paul? I thought you were over that guy,' Harry went on like those little things mattered. Aliza didn't cry. What did you solve with crying? She would never cry over something irrelevant like a guy. But Harry didn't know that. Harry was blind, like all the other humans.

She had felt like he understood her. But he could never understand her. He would only be a victim of her rage and frustrations.

She stood abruptly. It gained her the undivided attention from everyone in the small café.

'Harry, you will never understand what is wrong with me! You try to be different, but you are just like all those other wannabe's! I gotta deal with my own shit, and you ain't no part of my life! So get your ass out of it!'

She hated herself for screaming at him – in the old slang Bobby used to talk in – but she didn't really have a choice. And even if she did, her head could not comprehend that at the moment. All she felt, was anger. She knew it was the Nephilim side playing up.

Aliza turned and walked out of the café. She roamed the streets once more, until she got an idea.

'What's your name, sweetheart?'

'It's Collins for you, dear.'

'We've got a funny one ladies and gentlemen! Let's see whether this comedian can fight too!'

Aliza unzipped her jacket and threw it out of the cage. Her old habit – one she hadn't picked up since her college days – came back to her. She had found a good spot, where no one would know her. She needed some unfamiliar faces she could scream or punch at.

And the 'lady' she was going to fight was going to receive it. A bell rang and the fight started. The other woman engaged, but then didn't swing. She was provoking Aliza. And it worked. Aliza took a step forward and aimed for the face. However, the woman was fast enough to grab her hand and twist her wrist.

Aliza twitched to the ground, cradling her wrists. In all her enthusiasm, she had forgotten she was out of practice. The hunts she lately had, had been too easy. No real fights anymore.

With the technique partly gone, she focused on her energy. Energy flowing from her anger. She raised back to her feet in a second and kicked the woman fully in the stomach. She took a step back as she took the blow. Aliza gave a quick hit to the kneecaps. The woman fell to her knees. Aliza gave herself a moment to readjust her stance.

Then the woman was back on her feet and grabbed Aliza around her waist. She raised her with ease in the air and threw her in the iron fence. Aliza's head hit the metal hard. At that point, the last string snapped.

Aliza lunged forward. She grabbed the woman around her neck and squeezed. The woman choked and tried to claw at Aliza. Just when she started to turn purple, Aliza released her neck to slam her across the face. And again. And again. Blood started pouring from her nose and mouth. And again. This felt really good. And again. Even harder.

'Mercy!' she screamed. 'Stop!'

And again.

'Okay, stop it! You have won!' the contest leader yelled when he came into the cage. He put his hand on Aliza's arm to stop her from hitting again. Aliza faced him for a second before she punched him too. The guy fell backwards on his ass. He looked back up in shock. The most unsettling thing about her, were her eyes. Not because of their different colors. They had turned an illuminous white.

Aliza focused back on the woman. She wasn't conscious anymore. She didn't even listen to the people yelling at her to stop. That she would kill the woman.

She would kill the woman.

She raised her arm again. The whole audience screamed: NO!

She looked down at the first human she would kill. _Every Nephilim will kill someone._

Was she going to prove she was a monster? Was she going to let God and his angels win?

Aliza lowered her hand and walked out of the deadly silent bar.

* * *

 **I know, this was a very short one.**

 **BUT, we are down to the most interesting part! Now that the backstory is fullfilled, we can focus on the present!**

 **Or at least, some form of present along the seasons. If you are still reading, thank you for your dedication. I hope you like it so far.**

 **Comments, questions, suggestions? Feel free to post them**


	10. Chapter 10

**Part four: trust**

 **Old story told anew**

'You shouldn't interfere with that family. They are crazy like hell,' the Sheriff told Aliza.

Aliza gave the older man a genuine smile. She adored the way this nearly retired man tried to save her. Little did he know she searched for the monsters.

'Thank you for the advice Sheriff, but I know what I'm doing. Would you mind giving me the address?'

He gave her a long look. She felt like her father looked at her because she asked to play outside, and he was at the brim of agreeing. Only she didn't have a lot of those memories.

'Alright. Who am I to question a fed anyway. Here you go miss Collins,' he replied as he handed her the file she needed.

She smiled down at the document. 'I really appreciate the fuss, but I am dealing with this lot at a daily base. Don't you worry.'

The man didn't seem satisfied, but he continued his work anyway. Aliza walked out of the police station, back to her car. Her 1971 dodge challenger stood along the road. Once again she made a mental note that Dean and Bobby made her obsess over old classic cars. Or maybe they reminded her of the old place in front of Bobby's house. The good old days. Over too soon.

She sighed her frustration away when she sat behind the wheel. She removed the clasp that held her hair up, letting her light locks fall in all directions. The rearview mirror reminded her she had overdone her make-up today. She always ended up putting too much of the stuff on her face. Partly to cover her weird eyes, partly because it felt like a mask she wore.

As she sat there, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. The last two years had been rough. Dealing with what she was hadn't been easy. After the accident at the cage fight, she fled town. She took little belongings and needed to start anew. She hadn't told anyone where she was going. The only person crazy enough to keep contact with her had been Harry, but since that day she hadn't talked to him either. She didn't blame him, after all the things she said.

When she was all alone in the world, her search began. Her search for peace. Accidentally, she had found an American-Indian monastery, where they were cut off from the world. She learned to control her anger and to accept what she was. It had taken her a long time to accomplish those things, but in the end she walked out as a new person.

That was when reality hit her again. She was dropped back in the world of judging people and hungry monsters. Luckily demons left her alone, thanks to her deal. She had run into one or two demons, but when they saw her they tucked tail and ran back to daddy. Angels luckily didn't know she was alive. Yet. She knew nothing could be long hidden from them. But that was, when she would show up on their radar. As long as she lived like a human, maybe she could go unnoticed.

But none of that implied that things were easy on her. Last year there was a serious problem with a bunch of Leviathans, trying to eat humanity. She knew too little about them to kill them, but she did hear a trick with Borax from some other hunters. And then one day, they all just disappeared.

The year after that was quieter. No big invasions, or at least nothing she knew off. The apocalypse had passed her without even knowing. Sure, there were strange things going on, but somehow she didn't seem involved. Luckily someone else took care of that. And that someone, were Sam and Dean Winchester. Not a single hunter in America – or pretty much the world – hadn't heard the story of how the Winchesters stopped the end of times. Aliza had felt a sparkle of proudness when she heard it first, together with a painful shot of hurt. Sam had jumped in the pit to stop Lucifer. Dean was still alive though, but it still hurt like a bitch. She only knew Sam as an innocent child, and the next thing she knew, he jumped into hell itself.

She cleared her mind from the memories haunting her brain. She needed to focus on the case at hand. It was pretty clear that she was after a vampire nest. Only going out at night, people going missing, weird family bonds…not hard to guess. She drove away, finding a quiet spot to change clothes and gear up.

* * *

'Shit!' Aliza cursed silently.

The sounds coming from the old barn grew louder as she approached. It sounded like a big fight in there. Someone beat her to it.

Aliza walked around the barn to the entrance. The huge doors stood open, revealing an odd scene. Three vampires were on their legs, trying to embed their fangs in the throats of the two hunters fighting them. Four more vamps laid dead on the floor, heads in other places. Aliza clutched onto her machete. Soundlessly, she moved around, staying close to the walls.

The hunters managed to slay the two vamps they were battling. They tried to catch theirs breaths for a moment when the last vamp launched himself at one's back.

'Dean!' the other screamed, but was too late to act.

Aliza on the other hand, had watched the vamp and was in time to swing her knife, to separate the head from the shoulders. Dean ducked to avoid the head landing in his face. A soft thud was heard as the body collapsed with the ground. The two parties finally noticed each other.

Aliza tried to slow her breath. 'Saved your life there, didn't I?' she said as she pushed her hair out of her face.

Dean looked her over. Then twice. Then a grin appeared on his face.

'Yes, yes you did. But tell me, what is a pretty lady like yourself doing out here?' he said with a suggestive wink.

Aliza rolled her eyes. 'Don't even start. Heard that one enough. Women can be hunter too.'

Dean wiped some blood from his face. 'They sure can. I'm a big supporter. Definitely the hot ones. Hi, I'm Dean,' he said while holding out his hand.

Aliza blinked a couple of times. She looked Dean deep in his eyes and saw the truth. 'Dean?' she whispered. Instead of shaking his hand, she moved her hand to his cheek, feeling whether he was real.

'O-kay…you okay miss?' Dean asked awkwardly.

'Dean,' the other started. He took a protective step forward, as if announcing she better watched her actions.

Then she turned to him. The other was a lot taller than Dean. His slick dark hair hung to his shoulders. But those eyes, they were the same. Tears started to shimmer in her eyes.

'Sam?' she choked out.

Sam pushed his eyebrows together in confusion. 'You know us?'

Aliza took her hand away from Dean's cheek when she realized it was still there. 'Knew. Once.'

Dean gave her another intense look. Slowly on he started to recognize the two-colored eyes.

'Aliza?' he said, partly shocked, partly disgusted. Once she was like a sister, and now he had flirted with her.

The recognition didn't seem to reach Sam. He just stood there, hopelessly watching. 'Who?'

Dean turned around to his brother. 'Aliza stayed over at Bobby's when you were eight. It wasn't for long, because she…ran,' Dean suddenly realized. He turned back to Aliza. 'You ran.'

Aliza still wasn't over the shock herself. She stared at Sam, who finally seemed to remember her.

'And you were in hell with Satan, or so I heard.'

Sam diverted his gaze. He looked ashamed. Dean seemed just as awkward on the topic.

'So did I. But apparently he is fine. He decided to tell me after a year,' Dean told her while avoiding Sam's look. 'And after that, when I was sent to purgatory, my lovely little brother didn't even bother looking for me.'

Aliza switched her attention between the boys she once knew. After the shock had settled, Aliza realized they had grown up exactly like you would expect: two hunting brothers taking over the family business. Only from time to time the fate of the world would land in their hands.

Sam had started a little argument, silently defending himself from Dean's accusations. Without thinking, Aliza grabbed both of them in her arms, hugging the Winchesters. They were both silenced.

'Aliza?' Dean asked, a little uncomfortable.

'Shush,' she replied, 'it's just good to see you guys again.'

Both of them relaxed a bit and started to hug back. 'Good to see you too, little one,' Dean replied teasingly.

She let go of them to face them again. They both smiled at her, and it made her feel warm. A warmth she hadn't known in a long time.

'So what happened to you? Since you ran?' Sam asked.

The smile on her face faded. She didn't like talking about her past. As she looked around, she became aware of their surroundings.

'Why don't we drink on our victory and chat a little, ey?' she suggested, faking a smile.

They nodded and all three left the barn.

* * *

After a clean-up from the vampire blood, they walked into a nearby bar. Dean ordered beers all around. Once the waitress brought their order, Sam started back up where they left off.

'So, you were going to tell about your life so far,' he pressed.

The lines in the beaten-up wooden table suddenly became very interesting. Aliza stared down to avoid eye-contact. 'It ain't no happily-ever-after story.'

Dean placed the drink on the table, so he had all attention turned to her. 'Didn't ask for one.'

Aliza leaned back in her seat with a big sigh. She looked out the window when she started telling.

'Got in the foster system. Raised pretty okay, for an orphan with my kind of past. But a kid my age back then couldn't let go of the things I knew and saw. So I started to pick up on some good lore books and read the newspaper articles under the 'mysterious deaths' section. Didn't make me too popular amongst the girls who played with Barbie's. Honestly, all kind of dolls scare the shit out of me. Anyway, after that it was pretty much the same. High school, college…,' Aliza gave a little smirk as she stared in the distance. Dean and Sam shared a look, wondering what she was thinking about.

'What happened in collage?' Dean asked, too curious to contain himself.

Aliza didn't stop smirking. 'Had a good fling.'

Dean snorted. 'One? Why would you even remember…'

'With my teacher.'

Dean stopped talking and grew awkwardly quiet. He managed a small 'oh' together with a 'not bad' look. Aliza continued her story, growing a little serious.

'And then the real life. Once I was old enough I started to hunt occasionally. Kept on doing it. Tried to write, didn't work out. Now I'm back to full-time hunting. Last year was pretty busy with all these Leviathans walking around. But hey, at least there was plenty to do.'

The brothers exchanged another look. This time Aliza noticed.

'Would be stupid to ask whether you were involved with the Levi's, right?'

They both kind of nodded. 'Ever hunted with others?' Sam asked.

She took another sip from her beer. 'Nope.'

'Always alone?'

'Like I said,' she held her hands out dramatically, 'wasn't the popular chick.'

Dean gave an approving look. 'Respect for that. Not easy without someone having your back.'

Another absent smile played on her lips. This time though, she wasn't going to explain.

'Well,' Dean started after a long silence, then he finished his drink and put some bills on the table 'It's getting late and I still have a long drive to go.'

The statement made her body go freezing cold again. That moment of comfort was gone. However, Dean asked: 'got anywhere to be tonight?'

Confused, she looked up. She scrunched her eyebrows together. 'No. Why'd you ask?'

He gestured towards the exit. 'Wanna join us for a bit?'

She looked from Dean to Sam. He had an approving smile on his face.

'For real?'

'Yup.'

'You trust me, after not seeing me for years? I'm not the innocent child anymore.'

'Never thought you were. Come on. Love to hit my bed before sunrise.'

Aliza finally allowed herself to feel happy again. A smile grew on her face. 'I'm coming.'

* * *

 **Who's ready?**

 **You ready? Next part...he will come**


	11. Chapter 11

**Isn't it ironic**

Driving after the taillights of the beautiful black Chevvy Impala didn't bore Aliza for hours straight. Dean had complemented her on her '71 dodge challenger, saying she was a 'chick with good taste for wheels'. Aliza had smiled, and was still smiling. She didn't even mind the cheap flirting Dean didn't seem able to stop. She could see him mentally kicking himself whenever he made a cheesy comment, reminding himself who she was. As sweet as the gesture was, Aliza couldn't help herself from checking out Dean too. The guy was a good piece of meat, no lying there.

She was on the road once more, still alone in her car. But there were people not far away. And most importantly: she had a real destiny. And it was a home for Dean and Sam. They weren't specific about the place, just that she needed to watch out for anyone following them.

* * *

Once they stopped the car, Aliza was partly excited and partly concerned. They seemed to be on some dirt road with no building within sight. She stepped out of her car, stretching her limps from the long sit.

'Home sweet home,' Dean called out.

She pushed one hip out, placing both hands on her hips. 'Seriously? We're in the middle of nowhere.'

Dean smirked mischievously. Like he was about to show his own-build treehouse that was way too awesome. 'That's what it's supposed to look like. Come on in.'

Aliza wasn't ready for something like the bunker she walked into. The place was huge! And all of it underground. She stood at the top of a staircase, curling down to a round room. Panels lined the walls, and in the middle was a massive table showing a map of the world. Behind the round room she saw a study/library room. Millions of books were on display. More doorways indicated the place to be even bigger.

'You've got to be kidding me,' she breathed.

'It's all real, honey,' Dean said. He clapped her playfully on her shoulder and started down the stairs. She followed him down. Aliza spun herself around in the round room.

'How did you find this place?' she asked while looking at the high ceiling.

'Men of letters left it behind,' Sam told her when he threw his duffle bag on the huge wooden table in the study.

'The what?' she asked with a raised eyebrow.

Sam chuckled at her reaction. 'Tell you all about it some time. So, think you could spend some time in here?'

She faced Sam and looked at him with sparkling eyes of joy. 'Hell yeah.'

* * *

Aliza spend two days roaming around all the halls and rooms in the bunker. So far she had discovered a kitchen, a bunch of bedrooms, each with an own bathroom, a parking garage – where she was allowed to park her car next to three old-timers – a training room, a swimming pool and a lot of other places. Even in a war bunker, under the ground, she had never quite felt like home before this. Of course she knew it wasn't her place, and she shouldn't count on a long stay, but for the moment it felt nice.

A home.

Two friends.

It was more than she had in a long time. Her house in the forest had been awesome, but it never felt like home. It was just a house.

As she tried to find her way back to the main room she suddenly got a nasty feeling. Something in her gut warned her. Something bad would happen? She was going to be sick from the chicken she ate yesterday? She couldn't tell, but it didn't feel good.

'I think we should check it out. Seems like a case to me,' Dean's voice spoke. Aliza was just one corner away from the entrance room.

'Shall we take Aliza with us?' Sam asked.

She rounded the corner and walked in with a witty smile. 'You sure as hell are.'

They noticed her and turned around. That was the moment Aliza realized there were three men in the room. Another man stood next to Dean. He wore a light-colored trenchcoat over a suit with a blue tie. He had dark hair but the lightest of blue eyes. He crooked his head to the side.

Aliza froze. She didn't take another step, she didn't even breathe. Only her eyes moved, as they grew big and blinked a lot of times.

'Oh right. You two haven't met yet,' Dean started.

She had already said it a hundred times in her head before she could actually speak the words out loud.

'What are you doing here?'

This surprised all three men. There, on the other side of the table, stood her teacher from college. The one she had sex with. The one she was sure she would never see again. Jimmy.

'You know him?' Dean asked.

'He knew you,' Jimmy finally said. His voice wasn't the same. It was a lot deeper. The same voice he used when things got really intimate. A shiver went down her entire body. She was pretty sure she was over the guy, that she never had any real feelings for him.

But damn he was still hot.

'He?' Dean and Sam asked simultaneously.

Jimmy walked around the table to close the distance between himself and Aliza. He came way too close in her personal space. She took a couple of steps back. He started to scare her. To add up, she still had the weird feeling in her gut.

'Jimmy. He has memories of you,' he told her.

None of this settled the panic she felt rising to the surface.

'W-why do you talk like it isn't you? You are Jimmy. You were…you know,' she stuttered.

'You knew Jimmy Novak?' Sam asked, finally catching up.

Aliza shook her head a little. 'Remember the teacher I told you about?'

'Yeah,' Dean said fondly when at the same time Sam said: 'yes.'

'Yeah…Jimmy was my teacher.'

The smile disappeared from Dean's face. 'You slept with her?' he asked the man with a little anger and a little jealousy.

'I didn't. Jimmy did,' Jimmy replied.

'Quit it Jimmy. This ain't funny,' Aliza breathed uneasily.

He lowered his face a little and looked at her through his eyelashes. 'I am sorry to tell you this, but I am not Jimmy,' he told her apologetic.

Her heart was beating twice the normal pace now. She started to realize someone possessed Jimmy. It could be a demon, but the Winchesters seemed to be familiar with him. Plus he just apologized.

It could be a shapeshifter, but that left her with the same statement. Any kind of monster didn't make sense. A part of her already knew what was going to happen next, but the biggest part of her mind tried to ignore the possibility.

'My name is Castiel. I am an angel of the lord.'

It were exactly the words she was afraid of. At long last, they had found her. She had come on their radar. She didn't want to blame Dean and Sam, but they were the reason this happened.

'No,' she whispered. Slowly she stepped further back.

'It's okay. Cas is a friend. I don't know whether you met any angels, but most are dicks. Cas is different,' Dean tried to reassure her.

'No,' she whispered again. The angel kept staring at her with that apologetic look on his face. He felt sorry for taking Jimmy's body as his vessel, but he wasn't sorry about the things he would do to her if he knew…

'I am sorry about my appearance. You should know that Jimmy embraced my spirit willingly. Twice, actually,' Castiel tried to sooth.

Aliza stared harsh at the ground, trying to stop the tears. Her death was near, and she could feel it.

'Dean, Sam. Thank you for the offer. But I can't stay. I will grab my stuff and leave,' she said to the ground.

'What? Why? I thought you said it was a fling. Or…did you…love him or something?' Dean asked awkwardly.

Her head snapped back up, staring at Dean. 'I didn't love him. I didn't have any feelings for him except lust. I wanted to try it.'

'Then why do you act so shocked?' Sam asked calmly.

Their concerned looks pushed her to tell the truth. The first tears fell.

'I can't stay, because I don't trust angels.'

'I told you, Cas is different,' Dean argued.

She shook her head and held her hand to her forehead, covering her tear stained face.

'I don't care. Angel is angel. I don't trust them.'

'Why?' Dean asked.

Aliza looked back up at him and Sam. 'I can't tell you.'

'Why not?' Dean pressed.

Aliza took a deep, shuddering breath. 'Because I don't trust you enough either.'

The brothers exchanged a look. 'I kind of figured. And it's fair,' Sam answered.

An awkward silence filled the room. The only sound was Aliza's soft sniffing.

'Anyway, I will be gone within-,'

'You stay. I go,' Castiel suddenly said.

For the first time since she knew it wasn't Jimmy, she dared to look him directly in the eyes.

'You need this place as a home. I can leave, and not come back,' Castiel elaborated.

If this was any human being that wouldn't torture her if he knew what she was, she would argue that he was their true friend and she was the intruder that needed to leave. But this was not that simple. She hated looking at a familiar, friendly face, and seeing her enemy reflected in his eyes.

'You would do that?' she asked with a little voice.

He nodded once.

Then it became too much again, and she diverted her gaze. 'Thank you.'

She felt something strange, like feeling soundwaves without the sound. The feeling was shortly followed by the sound of wings flapping. When she looked back up, the angel was gone.

Her with tears filled eyes looked up at the brothers.

'I'm sorry,' she softly replied.

'It's okay,' Sam replied.

Dean didn't seem to agree though. He stared sternly at her.

'So you demand that our friend leaves, but you don't trust us to tell why? In our home?'

His words cut her like knives, because she knew they were true.

'Yes. And that isn't fair,' she replied.

Dean rolled his eyes. 'Well, good we know you know.'

'I want to tell you,' she replied before he could walk off. He spun back around.

'But you wouldn't,' Dean stated.

Aliza hugged herself. 'I'm too scared.'

Dean gave her one more second to elaborate, but when she didn't he turned and left the room. Sam walked over to her and sat her down on a couch in the study. He sat next to her.

'Don't mind Dean,' he said.

Aliza shook her head. 'He is right. I know he is. I don't know Castiel. Maybe you guys can trust him. Maybe he is different about the apocalypse and all. But there is no exception in this case.'

Sam sighed. They sat silently for a moment.

'I could be a lot more helpful if I knew what was bothering you,' Sam silently said.

Aliza sighed. 'I know.'


	12. Chapter 12

**The first piece to the puzzle**

Dean dragged himself through the hallways. His destiny was the kitchen for breakfast. However, he didn't feel like eating. A lot of things were bothering him. Cas just came back from Purgatory, and he still didn't know how it was possible. The angel told them he didn't know as well, but Dean found that hard to believe. If he was honest with himself, he wasn't over Purgatory yet. The nightmares still haunted him. It had become hard to focus on the job from time to time. On the sunny side: their team was bigger than ever. Not just Sam had his back, he also had an angel that tried to become a hunter and a girl he once treated as a little sister.

A pit formed in his stomach. Aliza had turned out to be what he feared: a messed up runaway hunter. Just like himself, actually. He had always hoped she could continue with a normal life. Then he reminded himself of her eagerness to learn and train, and told himself he should have seen it coming. It didn't make it all easier, though. Aliza carried some big secret, and she didn't trust him enough to share. That had not just hurt him, it also concerned him. It was clear on her face how happy she was to see him and Sam again. She had been lonely for too long. He had kind of expected her to jump right in the family. To be the new addition. He didn't know why he had these strange expectations.

As expected, Sam was already up and in the kitchen. He sat at the table, laptop in front of his nose. He had grown stuck to the thing, Dean concluded.

'Morning bitch,' he started.

Sam looked up for a second, annoyed by his presence already. 'Morning jerk.'

Then Dean noticed the smell overtaking the kitchen. He saw the eggs on Sam's plate, together with bacon and toast.

'Since when are you the master chef?' Dean asked.

'Not my work,' Sam replied with a small smile.

Then Aliza walked in his line of sight with another steaming plate. 'I got bored. Here you go. Sorry, I ain't a master chef either, but it's better than the slightly moldy cereal I found in here,' she told him with a small smile. Dean could easily see she wasn't back to her wits yet, since she didn't dare to look him in the eyes.

However, he took the plate. 'Thanks. Smells great.'

It also tasted great, he figured out. He watched Aliza as she prepared her own plate and sat down next to Sam.

'Anything?' she asked while shoving her fork full off eggs in her mouth.

Sam sighed. 'Something, but it's hazy. At first I thought demon attack, but I'm not so sure anymore.'

Dean looked from the one to the other. 'Mind informing me?'

Sam looked up from the screen. 'The case Cas was talking about. He told us about those disappearances. But it's strange. Cas said they were only local, but they seem to be happening in a lot of places in that area. People go missing for a night, then come back without their memories. They do however all have signs of captivity and some torture. Someone is questioning people, I guess.'

'Why did you think demons?' Dean asked while picking at a piece of bacon.

'Some people reported they smelled sulfur in their house, after their loved ones disappeared. But why would demons question people, and most importantly, let them go?' Sam asked while scrunching up his nose.

'To cover their actions, maybe,' Aliza brought up.

'Maybe. Not likely,' Sam answered, stuck in the puzzle.

Dean leaned back in his chair, pushing his empty plate away. Aliza and Sam both looked up at how fast he had eaten. 'Well, let's check it out. Seems interesting enough to me.'

They all agreed.

* * *

Since they were on this case together, Aliza rode in the back of the Impala. Some hours had already passed by. The music was on, playing a Metallica album. Aliza had heard the songs so often she could sing along to most of the lyrics. From time to time she caught Dean glancing at her through the rearview mirror. Then he would quickly look away again.

She hated this feeling. She wanted so badly to trust the boys. How would they even react on something like a Nephilim? The chance they knew what it is, was small. The chance they encountered one before nearly impossible. Aliza had read that the sin was so big, nearly no angel dared to do it. In the history of the world there were less than ten records of Nephilim. Maybe the angels held back information, but it couldn't be a much bigger number.

There was a chance they would reject her. Seeing her for the monster she was. She hadn't killed anyone, while the prophecy stated she would at least once kill a human. If the Winchesters knew that, they might put her down.

There was also a chance they accepted it. That they could see how hard she trained to contain herself. That she only flipped once, and she held herself back in time. A close call, but still.

The dilemma was killing her from the inside. Her time with Dean and Sam had been so long ago. Sam hardly had any memory of her. Dean had known her for some weeks. What did they know about her? Alright, the past she hid from anybody. The hunter life she hid from anybody. That was something, but not enough.

Her eyes flew open when she reached a decision.

* * *

The sound of fluttering wings filled the motel room.

'I heard your call,' Castiel told Dean.

Dean turned around to the place Castiel had showed up. The angel looked exactly the same as ever, in all his trench-coat glory.

'Yeah, good you're here. Got some time to spare?' Dean started with a smile.

Castiel looked around the room. Sam gave him an a little wave while he was studying a piece of paper.

'Where is Aliza?' Castiel asked, not spotting the girl.

Dean held his arms wide. 'No idea. She left us with something though. And you are included in her words, so thought I better get you over here.'

Castiel scrunched his eyebrows together. 'She called for me?'

Sam took some steps closer. 'Partly. It's for all three of us. Here.'

Sam handed the piece of paper he was holding. Castiel took it from his outstretched hand. It read:

 _Dean, Sam, Castiel,_

 _I might carry things I'm not ready to tell._

 _But it's fair to tell you a little bit about myself. Maybe it will make you understand._

 _All of you must make the decision for yourself to come or not._

It was followed by an address in town. Castiel looked up. 'You checked the address yet?'

'We didn't want to take action without you,' Dean said.

He looked once more at the quick handwriting on the paper. He could read the stress and effort she put in those little words. Most of all: his name. After _Dean_ and _Sam_ there was a word crossed out fiercely. Behind that was his name. Some dots and lines circled the single word, wondering whether to cross it out again or not. He almost felt bad for coming, but if she decided in the end to include him, he should go.

'Then let's go,' Castiel said determined.

Dean picked his keys from the dinner table and walked out the door. Sam and Castiel followed.

The place was something different. It was a small bar, with hardly any place to sit. It was crowded with middle-aged men and woman, most of them looking like truckers and rednecks.

Castiel looked around with concern. 'This is the place?'

'Seems like it,' Sam said, just as uneasy.

Dean walked up to the bar. He asked the attention from the bartender, a huge bald guy covered in tattoos.

'Excuse me! You happen to know someone called Aliza Collins?'

The crowd around them grew quiet. They were eying out the three strangers.

'Dean…,'Sam whispered uneasy, wondering whether to leave or be ready to fight.

'Collins? You're here for her ey?' the guy replied.

Dean gave a crappy fake smile. 'Think so?'

Then the crowd laughed all at once. Most turned back to their conversations and drinks. Castiel looked around at the odd scene, wondering whether he imagined it.

'She'll be in the back. Have a good time boys,' he told them before going back to his job. Sam pointed out a doorway covered by a beaded curtain. They squeezed through the crowd. Behind the doorway was a small hallway. On the far end the intro from _eye of the tiger_ met them.

'What did he mean by 'have fun'?' Sam asked.

'Haven't got the foggiest,' Dean answered, trying to hide his own concern.

They weren't prepared for the view that awaited them. The place was a lot bigger than the front led on. There was a huge square room, big enough for an arena. In the middle of the room was a huge boxing ring, sealed by a steel cage. One huge woman came in the ring on the beat of the music. She roared at the crowd, and the crowd roared back.

'This can't possibly…,'Sam started.

'She is only 26, weighs less than a six-pack beer, but got the curves in the right places and a mean right hook. Let's hear it up for Cracker Collins!' a voice shouted through the microphone.

On the intro of _seven nation army,_ Aliza walked in the ring. She wore her long blonde hair back in a high ponytail, and wore trainer shorts and a tank top. Next to the other woman she looked even smaller. Castiel couldn't help but notice how her body looked even more beautiful in this tight-fitted clothing. He casted his eyes away when he started to see flashes of memories from Jimmy. He had seen her without any clothing on. Castiel liked the images, but it felt like he intruded her privacy. He wanted to find a way to remove the memories.

She shouted at the crowd. They didn't seem so cheerful to her as the other woman. They didn't think the little girl could win this fight. But Castiel knew different. Even this, Jimmy had seen before. The memories he saw were very random. Most of them were activated by seeing Aliza in real. For example, he hadn't seen any memory of Aliza in his classroom.

'Let's get ready to ramble! One, two, three…fight!'

Dean and Sam took a sharp breath.

Aliza wore a smirk on her face as she took some steps closer to her opponent.

'What you laughing about, bitch?' she sneered.

It only widened her smile. 'Just seeing you face first on the floor. Trust me, it's hilarious!'

It angered the woman like a bull seeing a red flag. She plunged on Aliza. Aliza easily sidestepped the woman. Once she was past her, she gave a punch to her kidney. The woman roared, but managed to punch Aliza in the face. The move was quicker than Aliza anticipated the woman could move. Mental note.

She turned her face away from the woman. Her nose was bleeding, but for the rest she would be fine. When her opponent thought she needed to recover, she made her move. She turned back quickly, knowing where the woman was by her heavy breathing. She punched the woman hard in the face, between her eyes. She stumbled back, and Aliza gave another blow to her throat, knocking the breath out of the woman.

She could finish it now. She could hit the woman over and over in the throat and she would be done for easily.

But Aliza walked away. She took a moment to stroll back to the other corner of the cage. She looked over the crowd, scanning the faces. There, close to the entrance, her eyes found those blue eyes. She looked directly at the angel. She started to see the difference between Jimmy and Castiel. For one, Castiel didn't look concerned. He didn't have that furious expression. He seemed calm. Waiting for the outcome.

She took a shuddering breath. Her hand was shaking from the adrenaline. A part of her mind told her to finish the woman. To throw in all rage and strength and take her down. Kill her.

She wasn't going to listen.

The woman had regained her breath and came for Aliza. She smiled moments before she ducked out of the blow the woman delivered. She turned around in her crouched position. Her upper body fell back, being caught by her hands. Her body weight was lifted from her legs, so she could push one foot out. She knocked the other woman off her feet. Before she could fall forward on Aliza, she rolled to the side. The woman laid on the ground, face first. Aliza sat quickly on her back, holding her arms tight.

'One, two, three…you're out! Collins wins!'

Aliza leaned closer to the woman her ear. 'Told you it was funny.'

She stood up and let her arm be hoisted in the air. The crowd cheered for her. It wasn't the first fight were they hated her in the beginning and adored her in the end. However, there were at least two people in the room by whom that was turned around.

* * *

After the fights Aliza came down from the cage. She had three fights that night. The second was as easy as the first. The third left her with a dislocated shoulder. She held her arm painfully when the crowd clapped her on the shoulder for support. Normally she loved the gesture, now she didn't mind if they stopped.

She walked directly to the three men in the back. Sam and Dean's reactions were pretty much what she had expected. Shocked. They gaped at her like fish. She came in front of them, bloodied and bruised. But she felt great.

'Hey guys,' she greeted.

'Hello,' Castiel greeted back, the only one talking.

It did surprise her, however. She stared at him for a moment. The angel tried to give her a kind smile, but it turned out quite creepy.

'What the hell?' Dean finally managed to bring out.

Aliza rolled her eyes. 'Mind discussing this somewhere more quiet? I can hardly hear you over the sound of people screaming my name.'

They followed Aliza back to the front. Once in the bar the men started cheering loudly.

'Aliza! Darling! How were the ladies tonight?'

'Soft and bouncy,' she joked. The men laughed with her. 'You still have my coat?'

The bartender threw a leather jacket at her. 'Thanks Phil!'

'Anytime!'

Outside it was quite chilly. Aliza tried to put the jacket on, but it turned out to be extremely painful.

'Would you allow me to heal you?' Castiel said behind her.

She spun around to him. She still wasn't used to seeing this look-a-like Jimmy who was her worst nightmare inside. No matter how she _should_ feel about the guy, she kind of liked him.

'Alright,' she agreed.

Castiel moved slowly, afraid to scare her. Aliza was afraid, afraid he could feel anything on her. So far they hadn't touched. Castiel lifted two fingers to her temple and softly touched her skin. It send goosebumps down her body. She felt weird for a second, but then the pain was gone. Castiel moved his hand away. She checked her nose for blood, but found nothing.

'Thanks.'

'You are very welcome.'

Aliza started to feel awkward with the way too kind angel. She pushed her hair behind her ear. Then the brothers exploded.

'What were you doing in there? You could be badly hurt! Hell, you were!' Dean yelled.

'Those woman are more like beasts! This is too dangerous!' Sam yelled at the same time.

There came no end to the flood of words and accusations. Aliza crossed her arms and rolled her eyes, letting it all wash over her. After some minutes they seemed to stop.

'You are a bunch of idjits, you know that?' Aliza replied.

A flash of pain shot through both the boys. Aliza didn't know why, but she was afraid to ask.

'Why did you take us here?' Sam asked.

Aliza started to pace. 'Ever since I was old enough, I have been doing cage fights. In college people didn't agree with my actions. Most of the people that found me there,' she looked up at Castiel, 'yelled at me like you do now. But those people didn't know about the hunting. Seriously: you think it's fine I follow werewolves in the forest at night or walk into a haunted mansion, but a cage fight is too dangerous?'

They didn't seem to have an answer.

'I know what I am doing in there. I never lose. I am a skilled fighter, and sometimes I like to express that in these fights. For once it makes me feel good. People who cheer for me, who encourage me.'

That left the four in silence for some time. They were afraid to reply for some time.

'I guess it makes sense,' Sam finally said.

Dean sighed. 'Maybe it does.'

Luckily, that didn't take long. She hated to have that old discussion again.

'Well,' Dean started, as he rubbed his hands together, 'I want to get out of the cold. I really need a drink right now. Hit a bar? Another one.'

Sam nodded. 'Yeah, sounds good.'

Aliza rubbed her upper arms for warmth. 'I think I'm gonna hit my bed. The fight knocked out my energy for one.'

Dean turned to the angel. 'Cas? You coming?'

The angel took a long moment to think. He stared at Aliza, but she didn't want to face him back.

'I need to attend to some things of import.'

Then he was gone.

Dean rolled his eyes and walked to the Impala. Aliza started to walk back to the motel.

* * *

A hot shower washed away her sweat and worries for tonight. Apart from the boys going crazy, she saw it as a good night. She was able to control herself. She was more nervous about that tonight than their reaction. But all went well.

And then Castiel. He reacted better than anyone had ever done. But she reminded herself that he had Jimmy's memories, so he knew about this. Her eyes flew open.

He had Jimmy's memories.

Normal people would worry about her sex memories, but that wasn't the worst part.

She had spoken in Enochian to him. Castiel could recognize the language. She had told him she didn't know why, but sometimes she spoke the tongue. Castiel could know.

She cursed herself for not thinking of this earlier. But on the other hand, if Castiel had seen those memories, why didn't he take action? Maybe she could ask him once. The thought of seeing the angel again didn't scare her. She actually looked forward to it.

What was her problem?

She walked out of the bathroom into the main room. She had a room next to Sam and Dean. She gave a little scream of surprise when she noticed a person sitting on her bed.

Castiel sat there, staring at the far wall. He looked up at her weird sound. He looked her up and down without shame. Although she wore a shirt and sweatpants, she felt naked under his watchful eyes. Then his gaze landed on her eyes.

'You have beautiful eyes. They are….extraordinary,' he said thoughtful.

She blushed at the compliment. 'What are you doing here?'

He didn't move to stand up, so she sat down at the edge of the other bed, facing him.

'I meant to speak to you alone,' he said seriously.

Aliza's heartbeat sped up. 'I thought I made it clear I can't be around you,' she whispered half-hearted.

'I remember. I thought your terms were different because you invited me tonight,' Castiel tried.

She looked back up at him. 'Fine. What is it?'

He gave her the most intense look she ever had on her. It made her uncomfortable. But not just in a bad way.

'You held yourself back tonight.'

She raised one eyebrow, not expecting that. 'Wait, what?'

He kept staring. 'At the fight. You were stronger. You could have finished those women in a second. But you didn't. I saw you fighting yourself. Why?'

She opened her mouth a couple of times before actual words came out. 'All for the show.'

She diverted her eyes. She could still feel the pressure of his gaze on her.

'I know you are lying. I am a celestial being.'

That was the reminder she needed, but didn't want.

'I know. That's why I don't trust you.'

At last, he looked away. He looked…hurt? Did angels get hurt? Did they have feelings? She started to see what Dean meant by him being different from other angels. She imagined them really different.

Without thinking, she told him anyway.

'I was afraid I would kill those women.'

Castiel snapped his eyes back up. 'Kill?'

Aliza mentally kicked herself. She couldn't lie. She could tell a part of the truth though.

'I struggled with my temper. When I get really angry, I get dangerous. Think it is because I'm a hunter.'

Castiel kept staring. He waited for the rest. She didn't intend to tell more, but those eyes commanded her to go on. They weren't Jimmy's eyes. They were Castiel's eyes.

'Once in a fight, I nearly killed someone.'

'Nearly? What stopped you?' Castiel asked calmly. He didn't seem shocked by her confession.

She thought back on that night. What did stop her? The people screaming? It was her own reflection in the eyes of her victim, that scared her.

'I don't really know,' she said with a deep sigh. She held her head up by her hands.

Castiel seemed to take in her words. He nodded a little in himself.

'Thank you for telling me.'

She laughed nervously. 'I have no idea why I did that, though.'

She turned her face away, afraid to face the angel. She was afraid he could make her tell everything. She felt rough hands on her own, taking hers in his. It made her face him again in surprise.

'You can trust me. I can feel that there is something different about you, I just do not know what. And I don't have to know. All I want, is to gain your trust.'

It made her burn bright red. This feeling was new to her. Was this what it was like to have a friend? Someone you could really trust?

 _Castiel is an angel._

 _Castiel is an angel._

She let go of his hands and stood up from the bed. 'You should go back to that important thing,' she told him while leaning against the wall, back to the angel.

The fluttering of wings announced his departure. Once again she cried, and once again she wondered what tears solved.

* * *

 **Oh what a tragedy...**


	13. Chapter 13

**Deal with the devil**

The next day the Winchesters and Aliza discussed the case they were on over breakfast. Dean had ordered a plate full of all kinds of meat, while Sam had some toast. Aliza had some eggs and bacon, but so far she had left it untouched. Her stomach was too much in a knot to eat.

'So we might want to check out that place. Do you agree?' Sam asked Aliza.

She was mindlessly staring at a point in the distance. Sam waved his hand through her line of sight.

'Aliza?'

She shook her head awake. 'Sorry what?'

'What got your head in the clouds?' Dean asked with a mouthful.

Aliza blushed a little. 'Things.'

'Things?' Dean asked.

'Yeah…,' she responded, her mind wandering again.

Sam gave a deep sigh. 'Sorry to say so, but you might want your head in this case before you walk in a supernatural fight. If you don't feel like it you can also…,'

She straightened her back. 'No, no I'm in. I want to find this son of a bitch. I can push this aside for the time being. Just tell me what you were asking me a moment ago.'

Sam gave her a long thoughtful look before answering:

'Yesterday someone else was seen wandering into the woods. I thought we could check out that area.'

Aliza nodded. 'Good. Let's gear up and go. We scout the area at daylight. At night there might be another victim, so we should stay and wait it out.'

Sam nodded. 'Seems like a plan.'

* * *

Dressed in hiker clothing, with medium backpacks strapped to their backs, the three hunters walked through the forest. This town was surrounded by big woods. There was a lot of ground to cover. Plus, they didn't really know what they were looking for. Aliza kind of hoped they would find an old farm or country house.

Dean seemed to be quickening the pace, as Sam fell behind next to her.

'I meant to give you my excuses,' he started.

Aliza looked up at the way taller guy. She never saw herself as too short, but walking next to Sam gave her some other ideas.

'What for?'

He gave a little smile. 'My reaction yesterday. I've been thinking about it, and my reaction was irrational. You're a hunter, not a little defenseless girl.'

Aliza smiled back. 'There isn't really a going back after being chased by a vampire when you're ten years old.'

Sam directly looked at her. 'I'm sorry, but I can't remember a lot of our time back then. What happened?'

'Even if you did remember, you wouldn't know this story. You were too young to know about monsters.'

'You were only one or two years older,' Sam joked back.

'I know. I was too young. Dean pitied me. Anyway, the story ain't pretty. Like…my entire life since that moment. My mother was possessed by a demon and she killed my father. She tried to kill me too, by sending a vampire after me. I ran into Bobby's car yard where he killed the vampire. He went back to my mother, and figured out what she was. Then he took me in. A couple of days later you two showed up in the middle of the night. Dean thought I was an intruder, and I saw him as one. We fought until Bobby put us apart,' she smiled at the memory.

'I do hazily remember that,' Sam said. 'Sounds like a lot of crap you had to get through.'

'Don't I know it,' she said softly.

They were quiet for a while. The only sounds around them where the dead leaves on the ground they walked through and some birds in the distance. The air was quite chilly, but nothing they didn't prepare for.

'Sam?' Aliza managed to squeeze out. She tried to keep her eyes focused on the forest ground.

'Yes?' he answered.

She started two times without making a sound. She took a deep breath before finally asking:

'Is Bobby dead?'

Not just Sam, but also Dean stopped in his tracks. They turned to face her. Hurt was readable on their faces.

'How did you know?' Dean asked.

Aliza looked away, suppressing the tears. 'I took some habits over from him, and I noticed you flinch or look really hurt whenever I do that. Plus, the guy was a hunter.'

She took a moment before continuing. 'How did he die?'

Sam took a deep shuddering breath. 'He was shot by Dick Roman, leader of the Leviathans.'

Aliza nodded, her eyes on the ground. 'Thank you for telling me.'

They continued their hike in silence.

* * *

The sun had set, and they had yet not found anything. The forest seemed quiet, like nothing happened or would happen. They started to lose hope, at the moment Aliza spotted movement.

'There,' she pointed excitedly.

'What?' Dean asked, scanning the dark surroundings.

'I saw someone. Come on.'

They moved quietly through the trees. When they came closer they saw it more clearly: a man was walking through the forest. He seemed determined on his destiny. Sam stepped on a branch that snapped. The head of the man snapped up in their direction. All three froze in their place. It was hard to see his face in the darkness, but Aliza was a hundred percent sure she saw his eyes turn black. Then he walked on.

'Demon,' Aliza whispered.

'Seems like you were right,' Dean told Sam.

'That doesn't make me feel better,' Sam whispered back.

It didn't make Aliza feel any better either. Demons couldn't hurt her, what was a good thing. But Dean and Sam would find out about her deal with Crowley. However, there was no going back now.

They continued to follow the man, until he came into a clearing. There were more people there. They were illuminated by some torches that stood around the clearing. There were three men standing there, all in black suits. Their eyes matched their clothing.

'All demons,' Dean whispered. They all settled behind individual trees at the edge of the clearing.

The man walked up to a chair. He sat down, and the other demons strapped his hands and feet down. Once he was secured, the man opened his mouth and dark demon smoke erupted from him. It circled into the sky and flew away. Then the real man woke up. He shrieked when he noticed his surroundings.

'Welcome Peter,' one of the demons said with an evil smirk. 'We're going to have a nice chat.'

Peter struggled, trying to break free. 'Help me!' he screamed.

The demon punched him hard across the face. 'No need for that. There is no one that can hear you. Now, we can do this the easy way,' the demon took a knife from his pocket, 'or the hard way. I look forward to the hard way, to be honest.'

'I'm not telling you anything, devil!' Peter said heroically. It was however the stupidest thing he could do.

'You don't have to tell me anything. But you will tell my boss,' the demon told him. The evil smirk never left his face, but it grew bigger now.

'We need to engage,' Aliza whispered.

The boys seemed to agree. At the same moment two things happened. The three hunters shot out from their hiding place, leaving the backpacks behind, but all three armed. Then a new person appeared in front of Peter.

The hunters didn't notice the new arrival for a moment. Dean shot the Cult into one of the demons. He glowed up and plummeted down to the earth. Aliza and Sam rushed forward. But then they noticed the new arrival, and both stopped.

'Well, well. This is interesting.'

Sam grit his teeth. 'Crowley.'

Dean caught up on them, flanking Sam. 'What are you doing here, you son of a bitch?' Dean shouted at Crowley.

Crowley gave a little smile. 'Could ask you the same thing, squirrel.' Then he turned his attention to Aliza.

'And what a pleasure it is to see you again. Honestly, I thought you were long gone. Killed yourself or let someone else do it.'

Both brothers turned their faces to Aliza.

'You know him?' they both asked.

Aliza didn't take her aim away from Crowley. 'We met once.'

The other two demons started to engage the intruders. Crowley held up his hand and they stopped.

'Sorry boys, can't let you do that.'

'Since when does the king of the crossroads have so much influence?' she tried to divert the attention.

Crowley faked a hurt look. 'I'm king of Hell now, sweetheart.'

Aliza swallowed. 'Oh.'

'Why don't you attack us?' Sam demanded.

Crowley looked from Sam to Aliza. 'Oh, I bet this little sweetheart didn't mention our earlier encounter. You see, we made a deal.'

Dean looked up in surprise. 'You sold your soul?'

Aliza sighed and lowered her aim at Crowley. Something told her the rock salt wasn't going to work anyway.

'No, I didn't. I made one of the best deals ever. I tricked this guy,' she said while pointing at Crowley. 'And that's why they do not attack. My end of the deal was, that no demon can hurt me. Not even the king here.'

They both looked at her with a look of surprise and horror.

'And what did he want?' Sam asked.

Aliza walked to stand in front of the Winchesters. She stroked her hand past Dean's.

'None of that is relevant now. Deal or not, this guy deserves to die.'

She maneuvered the Cult from Dean's hand and shot Crowley in the heart. Or the place there would be a heart, if he had one. Crowley fell back. He was still for a moment. Then he grunted in pain as he pulled the bullet from his flesh.

'Auch!' He announced, like she had hit him with a frying pan.

Aliza stared in horror at Crowley, who came back to his feet. He dusted his suit and looked flushed with anger.

'You have any idea how much this suit costs?!' he yelled.

Aliza couldn't imagine him honestly paying for anything.

Crowley twisted his hand in a quick move. Aliza suddenly felt all the air leave her lungs. She grabbed for her neck as she fell to her knees.

'You can't hurt me…Crowley!' she squeaked.

'You didn't read the contract, sweetie,' he said, back in his calm aura.

Aliza raised an eyebrow. 'There was no contract!'

'There is always a contract,' Crowley said as there appeared a long list in his hand. It rolled all the way up to her over the ground.

'And it clearly states here, that in the case you try to kill me, the deal is off. No more protecting you, lassie. And I am really glad. Now I can finally do what you should have years ago!'

Aliza prepared for the end. With a flick of his hand he could snap her neck. She was sure she saw Crowley move, when she vaguely heard a sound and looked up at someone's legs. In one moment she saw Crowley move and then he was gone. She wasn't in the forest anymore. The grip on her neck had disappeared and she toppled over to the ground. She landed on a soft carpet.

'Aliza!' she heard Sam yell.

Then she coughed to regain her breath. She squeaked but managed to regain her breath. Someone pulled her back on her knees. She focused her eyes and saw Castiel crouching in front of her. Once again, he placed his fingers on her temple to heal her.

'Are you okay?' he asked concerned.

Aliza nodded. 'I'm fine. Thanks.'

Held tight by her arms, Castiel lifted her back to her feet. She wasn't even completely standing before Dean started yelling at her.

'You made a deal with Crowley? And you never mentioned it?! Is that your big secret?' Dean yelled, his face burning red.

Aliza stumbled a little, but Castiel caught her. She leaned against his chest and stared up at the angel. It was hard to concentrate, but she did manage to answer.

'Back then he was a simple crossroad demon, not the king of Hell. And like I said: I had the best deal ever. I had to convince _him_ to go along with it.'

Sam stepped up next to his brother. 'Then what was his end of the deal, if not your soul?'

Aliza pushed Castiel lightly away, indicating she could stand on her own. Only now she noticed they were back in the motel. She closed her eyes, but knew she needed to answer.

'Crowley wanted to see my soul.'

All three looked confused. 'Why would he want to see it?' Sam asked.

Aliza balled her fists. She started to get angry. Why did she have to tell anything, while the Winchesters had a million secrets she didn't know of?

'You should know Dean,' Aliza started. She gestured wildly with her arms. 'Your dad said it. Back then he knew. Bobby knew. I knew! But I didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to be _that._ '

Dean looked down, searching his memories. Then he seemed to remember. He looked back up at her with concern.

'You're not human,' he stated.

Sam and Castiel looked at him. 'What? That can't be,' Sam exclaimed. Then they looked back at Aliza, who had tears of anger and hurt in her eyes.

'I'm not human. Crowley knew it, and he wanted to know what I was. Since that day, I lived with a knowledge I never wanted.'

She took slow, threatening steps closer to Dean. She stopped in front of him, her eyes fixed on his.

'I'm a monster,' she said through gritted teeth.

No one seemed to have a reaction to that. For a long moment all was quiet. Aliza and Dean kept staring at each other.

'Did you ever kill anybody?' Sam asked with a little voice, clearly afraid of the answer.

Aliza finally looked away from the elder brother.

'No. No human, just monsters.'

'Than it's not that bad, right?' Sam tried.

Aliza looked at him in disbelief. 'I'm telling you I'm the thing you hunt, and you think it's 'not that bad'?'

He shrugged. 'Maybe we can help you.'

At that, Aliza smiled. It was a wicked smile of a woman who lost hope. 'You can't. I am what I am. Can't change it.'

'But you can fight it,' Sam went on.

Aliza turned her face partly, so she could see him in the corner of her eye. She nodded.

'Then there is hope.'

Another long silence hit them. Aliza had her back turned on the others. She didn't allow herself to cry anymore, so she just stared at the wall.

'We can fix this,' Dean suddenly said. Aliza turned around.

'We fixed so much that can't be fixed. We both died, multiple times, and here we are. We fixed the apocalypse, an invasion of Leviathans…damn us if we can't fix you.'

She looked away. 'Did you cure a vampire? Did you make a demon human again?' she tried.

Dean gave a weird sort of laugh. 'As a matter of fact…'

'Dean! I was born this way! There is no fixing that!' Aliza shouted angrily.

'Well, then we can live with it, the way you live with it,' he told her.

She didn't make any move, but Dean could see she started to take his words to her heart. He walked over to her and pulled her in a hug. He stroked his hand over her hair.

'You're with us now. Maybe it was a stupid choice, since we seem to attract world's biggest problems. But we are also very good at caring. Taking care of those around us. And sometimes we fail…' he wandered off, probably thinking about all he had lost, 'but sometimes we succeed too. And for one, I'm not giving up on you.'

If Aliza was a more emotional person, she might have cried. Even when she didn't, his words meant a lot to her. Then she felt a strong hand on her shoulder. Sam appeared next to them.

'Me neither.'

She smiled at him from Dean's embrace. Then they let go.

'Me neither,' Castiel said, who hadn't moved from his spot. However, he gave her a warm smile.

Aliza started to feel awkward under all the attention.

'Alright, enough of the chick-flick moments for one day,' she told them jokingly.

'I agree. Don't know about you guys, but I'm starving! How about we order some pizza and watch some movies?' Dean proposed.

They all agreed.

The evening turned out lovely. They all sat on the two beds in Dean's and Sam's room. The brothers occupied the one bed, Castiel and Aliza the other. All three (Castiel didn't need food) had a pizza box in front of them. They watched _the Terminator_ on the little motel television. Castiel made some comments on the movie, who turned out to be hilarious. They all had a good laugh. Aliza couldn't remember when exactly she fell asleep, but she did remember it was on Castiel's lap.

* * *

 **Hey guys!...or I could say girls, because, honestly...most of you are girls. Heads up if you are a guy!**

 **I noticed a lot of new story follow/favs and some reviews and I am really happy with those!**

 **I finally figured out how I want to end this story. It's all there...I just need to write it down. It might take some time, but I WILL FINISH THIS STORY!**

 **Keep telling me what you think!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Falling from the top to the bottom**

It was a disappointment for Aliza to wake up without an angel next to her. She sulked trough the morning. Only when she looked in the mirror, reality started to hit her again.

'What the hell is wrong with you?' she yelled at herself. 'You are supposed to run away from angels, not sleep in their arms!'

They prepared to leave and drive back to the bunker. The trees outside rushed by, as Aliza mindlessly stared out the window. For some reason the boys seemed to leave her alone. They shared some looks, but never one with her.

Would they still be upset over the monster thing? They couldn't put a sticker on her yet with 'hi, I'm a Nephilim', and that was the reason they stayed calm. Aliza had figured out they wanted to find out what she was, before releasing hell upon her. It was painful to know, how they didn't trust her. However, it was only fair: since she didn't trust them either.

Not as long as they didn't know what she was.

But she wasn't ever going to tell them. It would be her death.

* * *

It was three O'clock in the morning. A bright lamp and hot damping tea were all that kept Aliza awake. Ever since she entered this place, she had wanted to dive in the books of the library and seek all about Nephilim. See whether there was something in here she could learn about herself, that her own lore books didn't mention.

At day she could - for obvious reasons - not do this. That's why this seemed like the right time. Her eyes started drooping at the boring old language she tried to process. After she had read the same sentence ten times over, she decided this wasn't working. An old radio in the room caught her attention. She turned on the old buttons and managed to get music on. It was a mix between classic violin music and new up-tempo. Aliza swung her head on the epic beat. She walked around the room. Slowly, her feet started catching the beat too, as they moved in sync.

She dropped the reading as she walked in the round room and did something she hadn't done in a long time: she danced.

It wasn't elegant, it wasn't choreographed. She just did whatever she felt like doing. It ended up with a lot of swinging her arms, while she took big, fluttery steps. For a long moment she simply enjoyed the music. She could let all her worries go…

'What are you doing?'

And all the worries were back. Aliza turned quickly to find the source. Castiel stood there, next to the table with all her open books. He didn't look at the books, he looked at her. His face was slightly turned to the side, like he always did when he was confused. She held her stomach as she felt the butterflies tickle her again. The feeling was mixed with concern and shame. She was still standing there in just a thin top and pajama pants.

'I…didn't see you there,' she said uneasily.

Her awkwardness caused Castiel to walk in the room with her, leaving her studies behind. She gave a little sigh of relief.

'I noticed. But what are you doing here in the middle of the night? Humans are supposed to sleep, right?' he said.

A painful pang shot through her chest. She looked down. 'I'm not human.'

She stood there with her chin on her chest, looking at her bare feet on the cold ground. She only heard Castiel move forward, until she saw him get so close she could see his shoes. A finger was placed under her chin and kindly moved her face back up. She stared into those intense eyes. Never could she resist those blue eyes. They were beauty itself. She wondered what he thought of her misshaped eyes. He had told her they were beautiful, but how could anyone think that? Apart from Jimmy, who said the same thing…

He didn't say a word. Suddenly she could feel his other hand on her waist. She gave a little gasp. The hand under her chin moved down her arm to her other hand.

'Now, I have never done this myself, but I did watch others do this before,' he said while studying his hand in hers.

Another song played on the radio. It was the same kind of music. On the first tone Castiel took a step forward. Just in time Aliza remembered to follow his lead. Then they took another step. The moves became faster and less awkward. They let the rhythm guide them, as they strode around the table in the middle.

They danced. An angel and a Nephilim danced in the middle of the night in a bunker underground.

Once they became confident and weren't counting their steps anymore, Aliza couldn't look away from Castiel's eyes. Castiel seemed just as intrigued. The world and all its problems seemed to fade away around them. All that mattered were the music and them two.

At last the music stopped. Their steps transformed in little swaying from one side to the other. Aliza felt the need to say something, but nothing seemed like the right thing. Then Castiel pressed her to his chest, his hands circling protective around her.

'You might not be completely human,' he started. Aliza stiffened, but he continued. 'but you dance like one. You talk like one. You get sleepy like one. And you are warm and full of emotions like one. That is more than an angel is. Sometimes, I feel like a monster. I wonder what the difference is between these things that Dean and Sam hunt, and me.'

Aliza pushed a little away from his chest so she could look at him.

'The difference is, that you know what is right and wrong. You do not kill people without a good reason. Or at least, that is what Sam told me about you.'

He stared back at her. They had stopped swaying, but they were still very close.

'Do you?'

Aliza raised an eyebrow. 'Sorry, what?'

'Do you know what is right and wrong? Do you only kill for the right reasons?' he asked her.

Aliza gaped like a fish. 'I do.'

Castiel pushed her a little further. He held her shoulders in his hands, and brought his face to her height.

'Then you aren't a monster either. You are like me: a weird person with the right reasons. We are both not sure what to do, but we do know what is right. And that is why Dean and Sam trust us, and do not hunt us.'

Truer words had never been spoken. She wanted to throw all her worries away and lean on Castiel's words. She wanted to tell him so badly. She already started opening her mouth to say the words.

The words never left her mouth though, because Castiel moved forward and kissed her very softly on her lips. Aliza was taken aback by the gesture. At first her eyes grew in shock, but then she closed them, enjoying the moment. It felt right and wrong at the same time. A feeling in her told her to stop, while another encouraged her to go on.

Castiel released her. It took her a moment before she opened her eyes.

'Was that…appropriate?' he asked, uncertain.

Aliza gave a nervous chuckle. 'Yeah…it was.' She looked up in his adorable eyes.

What was wrong about this again? Did that part of her even look at his face? Not Jimmy's, but Castiel's. Aliza could tell the difference, in all the small details. And she loved them so much more than Jimmy's features.

The radio started to give off a loud rushing sound. Aliza snapped her head up and went over to turn it down, before the boys would wake up. She turned to the table with her research. She placed her hands on the back of the chair and looked down at the books.

Castiel moved to stand behind her. Hesitantly, he took a string of her hair and started twirling it around his finger.

'What's wrong?' he asked softly.

Her arms started to shake. This was driving her crazy, the constant inner fight she had. She shut the books and turned the light off. Then she turned around. Castiel had moved closer, once again in her personal space. This time it didn't feel awkward. It felt good. She moved her hand to his hair and started to stroke through it.

'What if I told you, you were gonna hate me? If you knew what I was?'

Castiel searched her face for answers. 'I can't hate you.'

Aliza gave him a weak smile. 'You don't know that.'

'I do. I have these feelings for you, I never felt before. I don't know how to express them right, or how to tell you what it feels like. But I know you are important to me, and I will not let you go,' he told her.

It was better than anything a guy had ever told her. Castiel wasn't even aware of what he said, because he was an angel. Yet, no boyfriend had ever told her something so honest. It hurt her so much that she had to refrain herself from letting him in.

She pushed lightly at his chest, so she could walk away.

'Did I say something wrong?' Castiel asked. The despair was clear in his voice.

Aliza looked over her shoulder. She gave him an apologetic look. 'No, Cas. You did everything right. And that hurts, because I can't be with you like that.'

Then she turned and walked back to her room.

* * *

'There are a lot of things that could go wrong without it, Sam,' Dean told his brother.

'Dean, you are overreacting.'

'I sure as hell am not. Without it I can't be strong enough.'

'It doesn't make you stronger,' Sam said while rolling his eyes.

'It does for me!'

Sam was done. 'Dean, enough! I'm not going out to get you pie!'

At that moment they walked through the door to the round room. They stopped arguing over pie when they took a good look in the room. On the table were five bags: three duffle bags and two backpacks. Weapons, ammunition, flasks for holy water, graffiti spray, food and drinks were spread out over the table and stuffed in the bags. Aliza walked around the room, bringing supplies from point A to B.

'Morning,' she greeted while still walking around with arms full of shotguns, 'what was that about pie? I'd love some pie.'

Dean's face changed to a big smile. He looked at his brother with the 'told you so' look. Sam ignored his childish brother and took some steps toward the table.

'What are you packing for?' he asked.

Her finger pointed at the table. 'This we will need for the coming hunt. I did some research last night, and I called an old hunter friend. He told me about the docks in Gilly Town, where he suspects a demon gathering point. So, it will be crawling with demons. Demons that can finally kill me after years of a restriction. Thought we better gear up properly.'

Dean finally let the pie topic drop when he heard this. 'Whoh. You want to walk in a place crawling with pissed off demons, guns blazing, with three man?'

Aliza gave a little noise off agreement while she continued to load a handgun. Sam grabbed her at her shoulder and turned her to him, so she would drop her activities.

'That's suicide. We don't stand a chance,' he told her sternly.

Aliza showed a crooked smile. 'Not a lot of faith, right Sam?'

'This is not about the power of believing in yourself, Aliza! This is about being outnumbered! Sure, rock salt will hold them back, but we only have one angel blade and the dagger, and that's it! Plus, there is a chance there is a more powerful demon in there too!'

Aliza closed her eyes and sighed. When she opened them Sam could see determination.

'Look. One: I'm a monster. I do have some advantages from that. For example: I'm stronger than a human. I have the same strength as a demon. Plus a butt load of experience on killing demons, since they were on my ass all my life, until I made that deal. Two: We also have the Cult, what leaves us all with a demon killing weapon. And three:' Aliza stopped to sigh and place her arms sternly across her chest, 'I _hope_ Crowley is there. He needs to be put to rest. For good.'

Sam and Dean were taken aback by her harsh words. But they did see the truth in it.

'We don't have anything that can kill Crowley,' Sam started.

'There is one thing,' a voice behind Aliza spoke up. All three moved to see Castiel standing at the other side of the room. He walked up to them with an object in his hand.

'This vile is filled with heavenly fire. It has the strength of the first angels. This is very powerful, so it will remove Crowley from earth and Hell, for good,' he said while holding up a small vile. The inside was filled with white-blue fire, that swirled around in the vile.

'It's beautiful,' Aliza said without thinking.

'That looks like Anna's grace,' Dean remarked.

Aliza and Castiel turned their attention away from the vile. Then Castiel lowered his head in a nodding gesture.

'That is because this is angel grace. Grace that the first angels left behind.'

Aliza looked back at the vile. Angel grace. The thing she lacked to be a real angel. The content of that vile was the difference between Castiel and her. And about a billion years, but that aside.

'Let's do it then. The world, and even Hell, is better off without that drama queen,' Aliza said.

Castiel looked her in the eyes. He had hoped she would think the grace important for another purpose. Something more…graceful? Well that was just bad name giving.

'And you and the rest of heaven is okay with us using this?' Sam asked cautiously.

'No catch?' Dean asked suspiciously.

Castiel looked down. 'I want Crowley dead too. Aliza is right: we are all better off without that abomination.'

That word sent a shiver down Aliza's entire body. That was what Crowley had called her. She was worse than him. But for now, she was the good guy.

…right?

* * *

Cautiously and armed to the teeth, Aliza, Dean and Sam walked around the abandoned factory at the docks. It was completely dark outside, there was no moon tonight. The only illumination came from the flickering lanterns that hung on rusty hinges here and there, and the flashlights they carried.

Aliza had picked the angel blade. The first time she touched it, it gave her a little shock. Almost as if the weapon warned her she wasn't supposed to carry it. But that was once, so she continued to carry it. Sam had the dagger ready in his right hand, while he held a flashlight in his left. Dean had taken the Cult, since he had the steadiest aim.

It was obvious the boys weren't happy with this quest. Aliza had basically dragged their asses in this. For personal reasons she wanted to get rid of Crowley, but all of them had their reasons to kill the son of a bitch. Too many deaths were on his name, too much blood on his hands. The brothers had stopped whining ever since they left the car. Now their mind was set, and that was really necessary for tonight.

Castiel said he would meet them inside. He wasn't the most stealthy person to sneak around, so they all agreed on his suggestion. Aliza tried to push the memories from last night from her mind. Each time the boys mentioned the angel, her heart would make a leap. The way they danced, the way he looked at her…the way his lips…

 _Damn it happened again!_ Aliza was so done with her own dreamy thoughts, she felt like vomiting at her own sappiness. She needed her head in the game now.

They found a backdoor. It was locked with a simple lock.

'Not too afraid of a break in,' Aliza whispered while Sam started picking the lock.

'Who would break in in a demon hiding spot?' Dean answered sarcastically.

She rolled her eyes at him. Sam broke through the lock and the door creaked open. They all drew their weapons as they walked in the dark building.

There was no light on inside, but the faint light from outside illuminated the biggest part of the building. Still, the walls and corners were covered in dark shadows, possibly holding their enemies. The door they walked through let light in too, taking away their advantage. If they had any.

Suddenly, Aliza started to doubt what they were doing here. Maybe the Winchesters were right, and this _was_ suicide. Maybe they should have asked a bunch of hunters to join them, or wait until some of the demons were gone. They had no idea how many there could be. Not even sure whether Crowley would be here. Did she really drag the boys in here because she was angry with Crowley?

Or did she desperately look for a diversion from her thoughts from last night?

Then she saw something move to her right. She drew the shotgun she was holding and aimed for the place. Then a man came out of the shadows. He held his hands up in surrender.

'Who are you?' Aliza demanded.

The man gave a mischievous smirk. 'Doesn't matter, does it Aliza?'

A shiver went down her spine. 'How do you know who I am?'

'Oh come on. We all know who you are. The girl we weren't allowed to kill. Crowley was very serious about that deal you made. All these years, I felt the itch to tear the flesh from your bones. I felt the need to torture you in ways Hell would be proud of. Do you know, how frustrating that is?!' He yelled.

Then he composed himself again, and started rolling up his sleeves. 'But that deal is broken. I can kill you now. All those years just add up to the gratification I will get from this.'

Aliza felt like she was violated by a pedophile. She pulled the trigger, and a round of rock salt embedded in his flesh. He screamed in pain, but moved forward after a moment. Aliza lowered the gun. Her hand searched for the blade she hid at her back. The demon showed his black eyes and launched himself at Aliza. She held her arm over her head in protection, but the guy never touched her. Someone stood behind him and pulled him back at his jacket. The stranger placed his hand over the demons face, and a blinding light erupted from his eyes. Then his brains went to liquid. Castiel turned around to face the others.

'What took you so long?' Aliza breathed, still a little shocked.

Castiel cocked his head to the side and prepared to ask her what she mend, but then he saw the shadows moving. From all directions came demons, their black eyes reflecting their inhuman souls. The four stood back to back in a circle, eyes on all directions.

'Great idea, Aliza,' Dean said.

'Shut up and fight,' she answered back.

All at once, the demons rushed forward. The fight started.

As one force, the four fighters slashed out with their weapons. Demons fell to the ground, others stormed over their meat suits to form a new attack. Dean had the Cult in his other hand, but wasn't using it just yet. Sam slashed at anything that came too close to his brother. Dean defended himself with a machete drenched in holy water and salt.

Castiel had somehow acquired an own angel blade. He fought quick and clean, like a lawnmower over a grass field. Whenever the demons were too close to slash out to, he placed his hand on their heads and melted their insides. Just as effective.

Aliza circled around her with the angel blade in her hand. In her other she still had the shotgun with rock salt, good for keeping the creeps at a distance. The blade went from the one demon his head to the other his torso. All demons fell at the first stroke Aliza sent out. Saying she enjoyed it was a little exaggerated, but it did give her a good feeling to see her enemies falling so quickly.

An awful scream teared through all other sounds. Aliza's heartbeat stopped for a moment. She twisted her body quickly, just in time to see Sam laying on the floor. He was screaming and kicking, while holding his shoulder with his other hand. Blood dripped down his arm. He must have been hit very hard for Sam Winchester to fall to the floor.

'Sammy!' Dean screamed. He was done saving ammunition, and got the Cult out. He shot effectively at the demons, hitting one with every bullet. One even went through two heads. Aliza took slow steps back to stand protectively over Sam. He was in no shape to get up soon.

Castiel noticed their disadvantage at losing Sam, and leaving Dean with a gun with only a handful of bullets. He quickly impaled the demon in front of him before taking a step back. He dropped the angel blade. Before Dean could ask him what the hell he was doing, Castiel spread his arms. The air seemed to distort, like it did in great heat. But it didn't get warmer, there was just more pressure. Aliza felt her ears popping. Then Castiel slammed his hands together for his chest. All the pressure was send away in a shockwave. Aliza and Dean ducked in time, cowering close to the angel.

The demons however, got the full effect. The wave washed over the demons, taking them out by rows at a time. A long minute passed, one in which Aliza was afraid to look away from the angel towering over her. Then all was silent. She and Dean looked around to see no man standing anymore.

'You son of a bitch,' Dean breathed out, not believing his eyes.

Then Castiel collapsed. Aliza was in time to catch his shoulders, but she couldn't carry his weight. She placed him gently on the floor, careful not to hit his head. His eyes were open and desperately looking around.

'Hey, hey! It's okay. Just stay still,' Aliza tried. The angel was restless. He kept trying to get back up. She tried her best to keep him on the floor, and searched for help from Dean. That was when she remembered that Sam was also out. Dean held his brother up in his lap. He ripped fabric from his flannel shirt and bound it in strips around Sam's bleeding arm. Aliza felt bad instantly. Not only was this her idea, but she had also forgotten Sam the moment Castiel fell limp in her arms. Since when did she worry more about a celestial being than a close friend?

'Sam, you okay?' Aliza asked at last.

Sam looked up and pushed himself up in a sitting position. 'Yeah, I'll live.'

Dean looked up at her too. 'We need to leave.'

Aliza shook her head. 'Crowley might be in here, and we just killed his army of defense!'

Dean gave her a dark look. Instantly she felt bad about her words.

'We can't take him on with two, while we take care of two others. We delivered a huge blow to him, and next time we'll get him,' Dean told her.

Aliza looked down. Her cheeks burned bright red with the shame she felt. After a moment of silence she realized Castiel had stopped struggling. He looked up at her, with these big blue eyes. Was he judging? Was he understanding? It was hard to read an angel's emotions.

'Or not,' a dark voice said.

Aliza snapped her head up instantly, but was already too late. An invisible force threw her across the room, landing hard on her side. Her head hit the edge of a crate, leaving a big flesh wound in her forehead. On the brim of consciousness, she could see the outline of a man in a dark suit. With another flick of his hand Dean made the same air-dive and landed nearby her. He was out for a moment.

'Crowley,' Sam growled as he pushed to his feet.

'Good to see you again, Moose. Now, would you mind explaining why you killed all my servants?' he said, sounding bored.

Even Castiel found his way back to his feet. He struggled for a moment, but when he stood, he stood steady like a brick wall.

'You have violated this world enough! We are here to put an end to your domination.'

With all the effort she could manage, Aliza pushed to her hands and knees. She moved over to Dean and gave him a strong push. His eyes flew open and he instantly was moving back to where the action happened. Aliza followed him, trying to not raise Crowley's attention.

'Oh really, Cassie boy? And how did you plan to do that? You found some weapon strong enough to kill me? I doubt it,' he taunted while inspecting his nails.

Castiel took determined strides towards the king of Hell. When he was close up, Castiel towered over the demon. However, it didn't seem to intimidate him much.

'As a matter of fact, I do,' he spat.

Aliza was surprised by the level of anger in Castiel's tone. Sure, Crowley had done a ton of bad things. But what made him so particularly pissed off?

Crowley studied the angel for a moment. Then his face changed in an understanding look.

'Seriously? You would spent Heavenly Fire on me? I should be flattered,' he said with a smirk.

Castiel recoiled a little, not happy the demon knew his secret weapon. Still, his hand moved to his pocket, ready to pull the vail out. Crowley took a step around Castiel, so he could face the rest of the party. Aliza, Dean and Sam stood side by side, all with weapons at the ready. None of them would kill Crowley, but they could seriously damage the son of a bitch.

'And did the angel tell you what his secret weapon was?' he asked directly at Aliza.

She was afraid to answer. The least trustworthy guy in the room knew her biggest secret. She felt the eyes from her companions on her, so she figured she had to say something.

'He did,' she said cautiously.

Crowley looked taken aback, or he faked it. 'And you went along with his plan? You care more about killing me than curing you?'

It was Aliza's turn to be taken aback. She lowered the angel blade she was holding.

'W-what?' she stuttered.

Was he for real? Angel grace could do, what…make her an angel? Or maybe it absorbed the angelic force in her, and she would become human. Or maybe…like all things from Heaven, it would destroy her. Well, all things except one.

Crowley seemed to find interest in the conversation. He loved it how he knew more than the others.

'Oh, you didn't know,' he started. Then he looked from Castiel to her, and back again. And again, and again.

'Can you stop eye-fucking these two and just tell what you're playing at?' Dean grunted. He clearly wasn't happy that he knew so little about the topic.

Crowley put his hand out and gestured it towards Castiel. 'How is this possible? I know you are a bit of your rocker, but you accept that girl? More importantly, you haven't tried to kill her yet?'

Castiel cocked his head to the side. The look of confusion on his face got Crowley thinking. After a moment – in which Dean declared someone should explain what was going on – Crowley seemed to put the puzzle together in his head.

'Of course,' he whispered. He kept staring from Castiel to Aliza.

That was the moment Aliza had enough. She walked forward, closing in to Castiel. She wanted to reach for the vail. It didn't matter what that grace could or could not do: Crowley had to die. At least if she wanted to live. Crowley noticed her intention and used his powers on her to stop her. He immobilized her, leaving her hanging in the air. Then he Darth-Vadered her a little away from Castiel, to dump her in front of his feet. The grip on her throat remained.

'Stop it!' Castiel yelled, an edge of panic on his voice.

Crowley looked away from Aliza, but she remained squirming on the floor.

'Damn you, Crowley,' she managed to squeak out.

'You are defending her? Of course you are! I understand now. How could I not see this before?' he spoke more to himself. He was about to ruin the party, and Aliza was powerless. The demon walked up to Cas, and started explaining the things Aliza didn't ever want to explain.

'This little brat has been lying to you. She hasn't told you, or your Moose and Squirrel for that matter, what she is. What kind of bubbling pit of nothingness-,'

'Enough!' Castiel yelled in his face. 'You don't get to talk about her like that.'

Crowley laughed. It sounded horrible. He could laugh like that when he ran over a puppy.

'You are deeper in this than I had expected! Cassie, don't tell me you actually _care_ about her?'

Castiel kept staring in Crowley's eyes, but the fire disappeared. He was a terrible liar and his poker-face was even worse. Crowley laughed again and turned his gaze back to Aliza, who was still grasping for breath.

'And you? Alright, you kept this helpless baby in the dark, but you…you should know better. There was basically one threat to you in the entire world, and you run into his arms. I just don't understand why. Or are you just that stupid?' Crowley kept on going.

'I-I trust C-cas…,' she tried to tell him.

Crowley gave a snort. 'So you are stupid then.'

'Look,' Sam broke in, 'I don't know what is going on, but this isn't your business, Crowley. We will leave peacefully, for now, if you release Aliza.'

Aliza tried to turn so she could see Sam. Actually, she would love to do just that. But the conversation had no going back now. They knew too much.

Crowley waved his hand in the air and Sam was suddenly a couple of feet back, sitting on the hard concrete. Dean was swept after him, both sitting there, immobile.

'We are going to finish this talk. After that, I will let you all go. Just for the fun of it,' he said, actually enjoying this sick game of toying with her life and emotions. And her life wouldn't last long if Crowley continued to squeeze her neck like this…

'Alright, I will listen. But stop hurting her. She is nearly choking!' Castiel said back.

Crowley rolled his eyes but compelled. 'Fine. No fun to have her dying before the big moment, anyway.'

The pressure was gone. Aliza gasped for air. She had a déjà vu feeling, only this time the angel would not tend to her wounds. He was going to kill her in a matter of minutes. The thought brought tears to her eyes, but she wouldn't let them fall. She had to be strong when she died. She pushed herself back to her feet, and turned herself so she was facing Castiel. The angel looked her over, looking confused, lost and worried. All the things she had done to the poor fellow.

The poor fellow that was going to kill her.

She looked one more time in those eyes, and was surprised to see totally different emotions than she expected. She thought he would be mad and inpatient with her. But instead, he showed pity and remorse. Could there be a possibility, that she worried for nothing? What if, despite all he was and once stood for, he would accept her? He did accept her so far, and she had already told him quite a lot. Could the angel step away from his belief and fight alongside her?

It was only a flicker of hope in a sea of fear. But there was no other moment than now. The Winchester brothers were still sitting there, helplessly watching the three other people in the room. Any spectator could see it as something hilarious. A demon, an angel and a Nephilim walk into an abandoned warehouse…

'While we made the deal-,' Crowley started, his attention on Castiel.

'I will tell him,' she warned the demon. He turned around to face her. Her face was all seriousness and pain. Deep down she only felt fear, but she was good at hiding that. Together with the fear, she also felt anger boiling inside her. Anger towards Crowley for putting her in this position.

'Go ahead,' Crowley said with an evil smirk on his face.

Aliza took a deep breath, but never took her eyes away from Castiel. He seemed too shocked to move or say anything.

'My mother was possessed by a demon when I was ten years old. She killed my father and tried to kill me. She told me I wasn't human, and demons hated my guts for some reason even they didn't understand. For years I had no idea what I was. I tried to run away from it, but it always found me back. So I decided to fight, become a hunter. Even that didn't help. Sometimes I could get so angry…it even scared me,' she said, barely taking a breath in between.

'Then Crowley came. He wanted to know what I was, so we made the deal. He…looked into my soul. It rejected him, threw him out. But not before he could see the truth…'

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a moment. If this was her last moment, she wanted to stretch it, make it dramatic. What else was there left?

'My father was killed because he had been a vessel. To an angel. My father was an angel, my mother a human.'

Up until this point, no one had done as much as breathed.

'Castiel, Dean, Sam…I am a Nephilim.'

The longest and quietest moment of her life started. Crowley just smirked, but wouldn't say a thing. Aliza averted her eyes ever since the words left her mouth. She was afraid to face any of them. But mostly Castiel.

After what seemed like an eternity, she was too curious about his expression, and dared to look up. His face was like stone. He didn't even look like a person anymore, more like a statue. It was alien, the way he didn't even blink. Aliza started to open her mouth to say something. She didn't even know what. But before she could come up with a word, she heard the fluttering of wings, indicating Castiel's departure.

She didn't even know why, but that was her breaking point. She went completely limp and fell to the ground, crying loudly. Somehow, this was even worse than being killed. He was out there, doing God knows what, telling maybe all of Heaven, while she was forced to live on. Until her moment of execution. It was cruel, and hurt more than actually driving an angel blade through her heart.

She heard Dean and Sam shuffling. They broke free from the spell, because Crowley had left too. Sam rushed over to the sobbing girl, but Dean kept his distance. Sam pulled her in his arms, so he could carry her.

'It's okay. Don't worry, we are not going to hurt you. We will figure this out. But for now, let's go back home,' he spoke to her while carrying her from the building, back to the car. Dean followed suit, not saying anything.

'How? How can you still help me?' she sobbed.

Sam stopped walking and looked down at the girl. Her face was red and wet from the crying. Sam gave her the sweetest, realest smile she could imagine on his face.

'Because you are family,' he told her.

Dean looked back with a dirty look, clearly not agreeing.

* * *

 **THE WORD IS OUT! I REPEAT: THE WORD IS OUT!**

 **gosh, I can nearly feel Aliza's relief.**

 **What did you think of the moment of truth? Did it live up to your expectations? let me know!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Haunted houses and unexpected friends**

Aliza had started to recognize every spot on the wall. Every crack, every line. She was sure she would notice if one of them disappeared. The lines in the wood of her bedframe, the stains on the floor. Her room in the bunker was the only place she had seen in a week.

After the night in the warehouse, they had taken her back to the bunker. Aliza had fallen asleep from exhaustion in the back of the car, but she could still hear Dean and Sam muttering about her. At that moment she had been too sleepy to care, but afterwards she wished she knew what they thought about her. Once at the bunker, she dragged her ass to her room. Only Sam had come in once, checking whether she was still alive. Aliza had locked the door, not needing anything. Sam would leave behind trays of food, but also those remained untouched. Another pro to her being was that she could live weeks without food or water, as long as she wasn't active. And the little bathroom provided her with at least some water.

The worst part about that week hadn't been boredom or isolation: it was the constant pressure of knowing something is coming for you. Castiel hadn't showed his face yet, and every minute he stayed away was like a new needle in her skin. At one point she wouldn't be able to hold herself together. What would happen, was only a guess to her.

But a week had passed, and she was still alive. That was the weirdest part to all of this. If Castiel wasn't capable of killing her himself – what she figured was the reason he left – why hadn't another angel shown up? She remembered the boys mentioning something about the bunker being warded from basically everything, but Castiel knew the place. Surely he could get another angel in.

After another way too long hour, she decided this wasn't solving anything. She got up and left her room.

* * *

'How about the old mossy one, over there?' Dean said while pointing at an old book on a shelf. He and his brother were in the library, surrounded by tons of books.

'I already checked that one,' Sam said while opening a new book.

'And?' Dean asked.

'Nothing,' Sam sighed.

Ever since Aliza had told them what she was, they had tried to dig up information about Nephilim. However, they discovered the same thing Aliza discovered some time ago: there wasn't much in those books. The brothers started to grow desperate. They knew little to nothing, yet they knew it was a big deal. The part angel, part human thing, they got.

'Why isn't there any more information about Nephilim in these books?' Dean exclaimed in irritation.

'You know, you could just ask me.'

Dean and Sam looked up from their books. On the other side of the room in the threshold of the door, Aliza stood, leaning against the frame. She looked like crap. Her skin had paled and formed dark circles under her eyes. Her hair was beyond messy. All she wore was a black legging and an oversized sweatshirt. Her eyes nearly drooped closed as she watched them.

'You're out again,' Sam said. The relief it gave him was clear in his voice.

Aliza dared to take slow steps further into the room, by pushing herself away from the frame. Her walk was just as lazy and sloppy like the rest of her appearance. She looked bad, but not as bad as a human would look after not eating for a week. If a human could even survive that.

'Figured it became time,' she mumbled. She pushed some books to the side and placed her butt on the table. She faced the boys over a pile of books. She looked down at the books and started stroking the title of the big volume on top: _celestial beings from the Bible._

'I tried the same thing. Seems like my kind is so rare that hardly any hunter ever wrote something down about us. But I still caught up on some things,' she told them while eying the book. Then she looked up from the one pair of eyes to the other. 'If you're interested.'

Dean clapped the book he was reading shut and placed it away. 'I'm dying to stop reading after all these hours.'

'It's only been an hour and a half,' Sam said while rolling his eyes. But even he put the books away to listen.

Aliza fiddled with a loose thread on her sweater.

'As you know, Nephilim are the offspring of an angel and a human. Of course this is highly forbidden in Heaven, which is why there aren't a lot of my kind. When an angel finds a Nephilim, it is supposed to torture and kill it without doubt.' She stopped for a moment to look them both in the eyes. 'Which is why I was so afraid of Cas. But it ain't just angels. Demons have a gut feeling with us, telling them we are even worse than them.'

'That's not true,' Sam interrupted. Aliza stared at him for a moment before fiddling again.

'That's sweet Sam, but it is simple. Angels would rather kill me than a demon. Even humans are supposed to 'follow Gods will' and kill me, if they would know what I am,' she continued.

'Yeah, well, God and us two had more than one disagreement,' Dean told her.

Aliza smiled. She missed the joking Dean. Was he beginning to forgive her? She was careful anyway.

'Anyway, I am not that impressive. I am stronger than a human, but I'm not even close to an angel. I can endure longer without food or water, I can bear more pain. I can shield myself better from emotions. Although I must say, with all the things going on lately, I have gone quite soft. As a kid, I was known for scaring people with my reactions. I didn't even cry when that vamp chased me down, or when I told Bobby my mother tried to kill me. I _can_ shield myself, but I'm not so sure I _want_ it.'

'Seems like a good decision. It's better to feel something than nothing,' Sam said. His mind was way further back. Aliza wondered what he was thinking off, but it wasn't his time of explaining. She would – when they would trust her again – ask them about all the adventures they had. Must be good enough to make a show about.

'But there is one big downside to being me. I know something about my future, that I can't run away from. And it scares the shit outta me. But hey, how do you stop what you are?' she told with a thick

layer of hurt in her voice.

Dean leaned forward to grab her hand in his. She looked down at the kind gesture, and decided she liked the feeling. Like he was her big brother, protecting her.

'What is it?' he asked.

Aliza sighed and closed her eyes for a long moment.

'You see, I have all this…anger inside of me. I can shield off pain, happiness and all that, but not anger. When I get really upset, I am capable of anything. My anger will take over from my mind, and I will go too far. I already did once…but in the end I could stop. For years I have trained to control my anger, and I think I am in better control. But with all these things happening lately…I am still so angry. Hurt, humiliated, and lost…but also so angry,' she ended with a voice barely above a whisper. She tried not to let the anger overflow her thoughts. She used some of the techniques she had learned, and Dean gave her a friendly squeeze in her hand. It helped.

'But, it is said that all Nephilim will, at one point, kill a human,' she finally managed to tell.

That left the room quiet. Dean slowly retracted his hand from hers. She understood, but it didn't feel nice.

'Why? Why would you do that?' Sam asked, completely lost of ways to react.

'Because I will lose control,' she said softly.

Dean raised from his chair, so he was a little above her eye-level.

'I bet those other Nephi…Nepha….angel kids didn't take anger management classes. For that matter, maybe they don't even have people to help them,' Dean started.

Then he moved around the table to stand next to her. He took both of her hands in his, looking down at them for a moment before continuing.

'But you have us. We will get you through this,' Dean promised her. Sam joined them, and gave an approving nod. Aliza looked star struck from the one Winchester to the other.

'You do understand that I'm not human, right? I am basically a…monster.'

'You're not,' Sam told her.

She cocked her head to the side as she watched him with confusion. A habit she might or might not have picked up from someone else.

'Why not? What makes me different?'

'You don't kill humans. You only kill for the right reasons,' Sam told her.

Aliza looked over her shoulder at the round room. Her memories brought her back to another night, with another guy who told her the same thing.

'You're right,' she whispered, more to herself. She started to see what they saw. She understood now, why they forgave her. Even why Cas trusted her. Well, up until a certain point...

'Come here,' Dean said and pulled her in his arms. Now that she was standing again, she was reminded that she was a bit shorter than Dean. It felt great to lay in his strong, warm arms.

'Sammy was right,' he told her on a low tone, 'you are family.'

Aliza pressed her face in his chest, trying to hide her tears of pure joy.

* * *

'And after your brother went missing, did something else happen?' Aliza asked while writing notes down on her notepad.

The girl she was questioning hugged herself uneasily. Her mascara was smeared all over her cheeks, because of the tears she was crying.

'What do you mean?'

Dean stepped in, trying to sooth the girl with a friendly smile. 'Anything. Sounds, smells, temperature drops…'

The girl lowered her face to wipe a fresh tear away. 'Well, it was really cold that night. Seemed to drop even further when we noticed he went missing.'

Aliza and Sam shared a look. She continued to write the notes down. They were for the show. If she would really write down what she thought, she would write "ghost" and circle it a couple of times.

Dean took a step back to let a car pass. They were standing in the middle of a street in a suburb. It was the kind of community you would expect in _Edward Scissorhands,_ with all the dressed-up house women and rebellious teenagers. They were investigating the death of a seventeen-year old boy, who was violated till death. He, his older sister, and a couple of friends were throwing a party. Later on they found him in the attic, where he was strapped to a chair and beaten to death. His sister found him that way.

Apart from her talking about cold spots, there was no real evidence this was a vengeful spirit, or anything supernatural for that matter. They had to investigate about any violent deaths in this neighborhood, but Aliza had a feeling that wasn't going to be easy. If she looked around at the people in the street, they all looked like they had dark secrets. The 'too happy to be real' kind of smiles on their faces, the overdone clothing. If the neighbor would come knocking with a body slung over his shoulder, they would probably help hide the body.

It gave her the chills.

* * *

Sam came over to their table in a coffee room with three damping cups. Aliza took the cup to warm her hands. Not because it was cold, but because the sensation she got from this place was cold.

'I don't trust any of those smiling faces out here,' she whispered.

Dean and Sam shared a look before they looked back at her. 'So it's not just me,' Sam said back.

'Barbie dolls or not, we have to find out what killed that boy,' Dean said, looking around for potential eavesdroppers.

'Vengeful spirit?' Aliza spoke her mind.

'Could be, but it's rare that they beat people to death. It's hard for a ghost to keep touching objects for a long time. So why not pick up a weapon and be done with it?' Sam replied.

'Revenge? Wanting the boy to suffer?' Aliza said while shrugging her shoulders.

'Could be. We would need to find information about any deaths in this place. Hope the library could be of some help,' Sam said while taking a sip.

Aliza nodded slowly. She stared down at her coffee. Without noticing, the world around her faded away, and she was swallowed by her thoughts. Or actually, one thought. One person, upsetting her, scaring her, frustrating her…he ruled her mind.

'So anyway, how are you doing?' Dean said through her thoughts. She shook her head and came back in the world she was living in.

She flashed a smile. 'I'm fine.'

Dean kept staring at her intensely. 'You're playing our game now? Saying you're fine when you clearly aren't?'

Aliza chuckled. 'If you can, so can I.'

Sam gave a deep sigh. 'It is good to talk about it. We know what is bothering you.'

Launching back in the seat, she pouted: 'Yes, you know. No need to talk.'

They were both silent for a moment. Aliza glared at Dean, who was thinking about a fitting reply.

'I've been praying,' he then said.

Aliza's eyes grew as she sat back up. 'You did what?'

Dean gave her a hopeless look. 'I tried to reach him, so he would get his ass over here and talk this out. This isn't working-,'

Aliza raised from her seat. 'Get him over here? You know what will happen when he comes back?!'

Sam shushed her and pushed her shoulders to sit back down. He looked around frantically. A lot of people were staring. Aliza didn't care, though.

'He comes back, and I die,' she continued on a lower tone. However, the anger was still vibrating in her words.

Dean kept giving her this hopeless look. 'Cas is not like that. I don't know why he ran, but he isn't going to kill you.'

Aliza leaned in closer to the older Winchester. 'I do know why he ran. He started to get fond of me, and he couldn't kill me himself. That's all. He is a softie, you know that. But that doesn't mean he isn't in Heaven right now, commanding some other angels to kill me.'

She took a little more distance, so she could finish her drink. 'And the reason it is taking so long, is because the angels are afraid of the two of you. Cas knows you are protecting me. It is only a matter of time. I'm already in a slaughterhouse, awaiting my turn.'

A couple of days ago, she would have cried while saying this, but she didn't. Emotions weren't going to get to her anymore.

There were no more comments from that moment on. Aliza just hoped she could focus on the case, to distract herself.

* * *

That night, Aliza, Dean and Sam broke in the house where the boy had died. They had done some research, what didn't provide them with anything useful. However, they went in well prepared, with all kind of weapons. Aliza still bet on vengeful spirit, and she really hoped she was right.

'I get that it's efficient, but it looks really stupid,' Dean whispered to her while they searched the main floor. The house was quite large, so they had some ground to cover.

Aliza looked down at the pistol she was holding. In contrast with the boys' their real guns, she was carrying a water pistol, filled with holy water. It wouldn't do any good against a ghost, but it would against a demon. And lately, she was extra afraid of the creatures from Hell.

'When we run into a demon and you shoot it with these useless bullets, you'll squeak differently,' she snapped back over her shoulder. Dean smiled. At least she had some of her wit back.

They had searched the hall, living room, study and kitchen. There were stairs going both up and down. There were two stories, plus a cellar and attic.

'I'll go down, you guys go up,' Aliza replied.

'You sure? Maybe we should go together,' Sam proposed.

Aliza turned to him, a little annoyed. 'I can take care of myself. By the way: this family is coming home sooner than later, and I'd like to be out by then. Unless you want to explain you're hunting a ghost.'

There were no more complains. Cautiously, Aliza took the stairs leading down. She expected there to be a small cellar, but was surprised to find three doors. The first one was a small laundry room, the second a storage room and the third a workplace. She circled the third room – which was slightly bigger than the other two – and found nothing out of the ordinary. Suddenly, she felt really stupid: walking in someone's cellar armed with a water pistol. She disposed of the thing and picked an iron rod up. Her chances of demons were too small; they should have shown themselves by now. If it was something supernatural in here, it was probably a ghost.

She scanned the floor, and found a handle in the floor. On her knees, she searched the wooden floor with her hands for the rest of the trapdoor. She found it, and with difficulty managed to get it open. A layer of sand and dust descended on the first step of the stairs leading down. Out of habit she looked over her shoulder, kind of suspecting someone to be standing there. She was so used to someone appearing and disappearing from her life in a second.

The stairs led to a dark, small room. There were no windows, so the place was completely covered in darkness. She tried a light switch near the stairs, and a small lightbulb sprung to life. It wasn't a lot of light, but enough to make out the room. There was next to nothing to find. Only a chair stood lonely in the middle of the room.

Seeing that the room was empty, she turned to leave. But suddenly there was someone standing only inches away from her. Before she could scream from surprise, the figure grabbed her throat and started squeezing hard. She felt her feet leave the ground. Then he threw her back, into the chair. The chair doubled over, with Aliza laying half over it. Her arm had scratched along a nail that protruded from the chair. As she looked up, with the lightbulb on the other side of the man, she could see he was translucent.

Ghost it was.

She searched around for the iron rod she had dropped, but it was impossible in the dim light. The ghost appeared in front of her again, and hailed her to her knees by her hair. She looked up at the diseased young man. He couldn't have been older than twenty-five. He had thin, dark hair, which hung around his face. His eyes were a dark brown color, swallowing the pupil to one, dark spot. He had bruises, cuts and flesh wounds all over his skin. Before she could look any longer, he hit her in the face. For someone that wasn't solid, it sure came in hard. Then he hit her again, and again. Anger started to boil inside her. She struggled to fight back, but it was hard with his firm grip on her head. Before he could hit her again, she took hold of his half-existing fist, and shoved his hand away. Taken by surprise, the ghost let go of her hair for just a moment. She kicked out with her leg, but her limp went right through him. Anger caused him to be solid, surprise took it away.

Jumping to her feet took only a second, the next she was aiming for the stairs. Unfortunately, the ghost was fast enough, and appeared in front of her again. He was furious. With one steady knock to the head Aliza felt down unconsciousness.

* * *

A throbbing feeling to her head was the first thing Aliza noticed when she came to. Her eyes opened, seeing only darkness and some contours. She was still in the basement. She started to wake a little more, and wanted to reach for her head. That's when she noticed she was strapped down to the chair. A moment of panic settled in, and she struggled to get free. However, the ropes wouldn't give in. The spirit was nowhere within sight.

Now that she wasn't in the heat of battle, she started to think clearly again. She had recognized the face of the spirit. It was a cousin of the boy who died here, and the girl they spoke to earlier. He had died in this house, only three months ago. Sam had found that piece of information, but the article also said he was a peaceful person, who was too stressed in live, so he killed himself.

Aliza started to doubt that, seeing he died of violation.

Then the spirit appeared again. He looked down at her in the chair. Her heartbeat quickened, but she couldn't afford to be scared.

'Billy?' she said with a soft, kind voice.

The spirit of Billy looked surprised.

'Billy, I understand. Someone beat you till death. But that is no reason to do it back. You are no more than those people who did this to you,' she tried. There was a big change it had been the murdered boy who killed him. But if it was just him, the spirit would have passed on. So Aliza guessed the sister also had her part in the death of her cousin.

At first it looked like Aliza had said the right thing. Billy looked lost, not understanding what he was doing. But then he looked back up at her, and the rage returned to his eyes. He plunged himself forward and started releasing his frustrations on Aliza, using her as a punching bag.

* * *

'Sammie, I'm not leaving this house without her!' Dean shouted angrily at his brother.

It had been twenty minutes since they split ways. Dean and Sam had turned up with a big steaming pile of nothing. But even when they went down to the basement, there was no sign of Aliza, apart from the water pistol that lay abandoned on the desk. They had searched the walls for secret doorways, and the perimeter of the house for any track that she would have left.

But there was nothing. The owners and their daughter would be home soon, and Sam wanted to get out and walk back in as FBI agents, making their story more believable. But Dean refused to leave.

'I get it Dean, but this is simply thinking straight. Come on, we've searched everywhere!' Sam tried to reason.

Dean leaned in closer to his brother, his stand tense. 'But we still haven't found her, so we're not looking hard enough!'

Sam sighed and took a step away from the unreasonable man. 'Seriously Dean! The one moment you want to dump her along the side of the street, and the next you would die for her! What is it between you and her?'

Dean looked down. He had to admit, he didn't really know the answer. All this time he had felt protective over Aliza. But when she held back those secrets, saying she didn't trust them enough to tell them…that came in hard. Dean wished he didn't take it so personally, like Sam did, but he couldn't help but see the girl as family. Even when he hated her.

But you don't leave family behind.

Then Dean heard a sound he hadn't heard in a long time. At the same time, it sounded alien and familiar to him. He turned around to see Castiel standing there.

Cas was still Cas. Trench coat and all. But his face looked tired and lost. Yet, his eyes showed determination.

'Cas?' Sam asked in disbelief. Castiel ripped his eyes away from Dean to look at Sam.

'I know where she is. I will take care of her. But you need to destroy the spirit,' he spoke all business.

Dean was too paralyzed to reply, but Sam was sharp on point. 'You happen to know how?'

Castiel nodded. 'Burn the house down.'

Dean shook himself from his thoughts. 'No offence, but I don't really trust you enough.'

Castiel turned around to face Dean. His face was all serious and determined.

'There is no time for this, Dean! Aliza is hanging on, but she is nearly fading out! Do it now, or the spirit will get to me too!'

Then the angel disappeared again. The brothers looked at each other.

'Come on, let's torch this son of a bitch,' Sam said.

* * *

A line of red blood dripped down to the floor from her lip. It was a mixture of blood from her nose, mouth and forehead. More lines like that one dripped all around the chair. Multiple bones had cracked within her. She was stronger than a normal human, but the spirit simply kept on going without taking a rest. For Aliza, it felt like she had been sitting there for days. There was no way to keep track on time. She even lost count of the times he hit her. Somewhere in the low hundreds.

Her eyes kept drooping. She forced herself to remain conscious, but it was a hard task. Billy was admiring his work for a moment. Then he stepped back in front of her, ready for the next blow. Aliza closed her eyes, waiting for the impact.

However, there was a swooshing sound and a short cry of agony. Aliza opened her eyes, but everything was blurry to her. There was someone else in the room. Someone who had chased Billy away with the iron rod she had dropped. He knelt down in front of her.

'Hold on,' the man spoke, worry clear in his voice. Aliza tried to keep her eyes open, but they wouldn't focus. There was a little part of her mind telling her she knew the voice, but she was simply too tired to listen. In the next moment, she wasn't tied down anymore. Without the support, she toppled over to the front. She was caught in the arms of her rescuer, resting her face against his chest.

Another sense started tingling in the back of her head. She smelled smoke. Something stood on fire. With all her willpower, she focused her eyes on the man, who was now cradling her in his arms.

'C-cas?' she whispered. At this moment, she was really glad he was here. She didn't care about the danger he would bring, and simply leaned into his chest. As weak as her muscles were, she tried to hold onto his clothing with her hands.

* * *

Sam tried to get a hold on his frantic brother.

'Dean! Calm down! She will be fine!'

Dean struggled against Sam's hands on his shoulders. 'You think? We _know_ Cas wants her dead, and yet we trust him! Why are we so stupid?! She is burning up in there! I'm going in!'

Dean took a step in the direction of the burning house, when suddenly a huge blast came from the house. An enormous fireball shot up in the night sky.

'No!' they both cried out. There was no possibility Aliza could survive something like that.

'She is fine,' someone suddenly said behind them. They twirled around to see Castiel putting Aliza down on the street. She was half conscious, somehow still clutching onto the angel.

'Don't let me go,' she whispered when she noticed Cas was no longer holding her.

Castiel placed his fingers against her temples and started healing her. The wounds were pretty bad, and it took him a moment. He placed a soft kiss on her forehead while he healed her. Then she was back. She took a big gulp of air. The movement threw her off balance, and she nearly felt back down on her head. However, Cas was in time to place a hand on her back and hold her sitting up.

'You okay, buddy?' Dean asked with a little smile on his lips. Aliza looked up, becoming aware of her surroundings.

'Yeah, I think so,' she breathed. Then she looked up at the angel hovering over her. She tried to read his face, but he put up a wall. Flickers of relief and pain flashed in his eyes, but those were milliseconds.

All the anger and fear she should feel with the angel here washed away. She was really grateful to be alive. And wasn't that the whole point? He didn't kill her. He saved her. For some damn reason.

She found her footing and got up. Sam already called the firemen. They had seen the spirit of Billy catch on fire and move on to the afterlife. Despite her feelings, Aliza took a step away from the angel. She found Dean's warm arms, embracing her.

'Sorry we left you behind. Don't know why I trusted Cas,' he told her, mild guilt in his voice.

'Me neither,' she replied.

Then she looked back at the angel, a Winchester on both her sides.

'Cas, why did you save me?' she asked while tilting her head to the side.

The angel looked lost. He could only face the ground as he spoke. 'I never intended to harm you.'

Aliza snorted. Castiel looked up, surprised at her reaction.

'Sure thing, flyboy. Then why did you run?'

Castiel looked upon three confused and slightly angry faces. The faces of his closest friends. And he had left them behind, without answers. He understood their emotions, but still hated to be in this position. He sighed as he replied.

'I didn't run because you told me you are a Nephilim,' Cas started. Aliza felt her body going cold at the knowledge he knew her biggest secret. He looked her in the eye as he confessed the truth.

'I ran because I was afraid of you.'

Aliza and the Winchesters leaned in, looks of surprise on their faces.

'Me?' Aliza said, 'I was afraid of you! That you would come back with your angel buddies and make an end to me!'

Castiel held his hands up, trying to calm her. 'I never intended to do any of that. Yes, I was taught Nephilim are bad and should be destroyed, but I haven't been following Heaven's rules lately. The reason I left…was because I was ashamed.'

The feeling Aliza got was a mixture of relief and dread. He _wasn't_ going to kill her. But what was so bad that he couldn't tell her? She moved away from her mortal friends to step closer to the angel. Basically, he just said he wasn't going to hurt her. Not physically, anyway. She placed her hand softly on his cheek. He closed his eyes, clearly enjoying the warmth.

'Tell me,' she commanded.

Castiel opened his eyes again to look down at her. His blue eyes reflected the deepest part of his soul. Aliza had the feeling she could get through the membrane and enter the world called Castiel. She moved her hand away, ready to take on the story.

'A little while ago, there were problems in Heaven. Naomi had taken control, and she was terrible. The scribe of God, Metatron, told me there was a way to shut the gates of Heaven. I thought it was a good idea: get all the angels together to talk. However, Metatron betrayed me. He locked all the angels out of Heaven. Now, thousands of angels walk this earth, and most of them have no idea how humanity works. It is a big mess,' he said.

Aliza listened intensely. She found the story horrible, and wished she could punch this Metatron in the face.

'That really sucks. But you didn't know, so you can't be blamed. Although, I still do not understand what this has to do with me.'

Castiel looked down, but forced himself to look her in the eyes when he told her the most crucial part.

'For the spell to shut the gates, sacrifices were made. I lost my grace, but I have regained it. There was a cupid that had to hand over her bow. Little in comparison, if you think about it.'

'Get to the point,' Aliza warned.

Castiel looked into her soul, and she stared back in his.

'I killed the only other Nephilim on this earth.'

Seconds passed, minutes later. Aliza could only stare. Before her eyes the only angel she trusted became a monster. She started to imagine him ripping her heart out, eyes cold without emotion. A gasp was the first sound she made, while her vision blurred with tears. She started to shake her head as disbelief settled in.

'No, no, no,' she murmured. She lost his gaze and stared at the street, trying to stop the panic attack that would settle in. Disbelief, pain, lost, betrayal…and anger. Her body heated up, her veins on fire. She breathed through her nose, almost expecting steam to come out.

'I am mostly sorry about her death. Although, she was nothing like you. In the time I was away, I have done some research. The girl-,'

'I don't care!' Aliza shouted back.

Castiel's eyes grew large. He was truly terrified.

'You killed her! Not because someone told you, but because _you_ decided it was the righteous thing! Isn't that exactly why you aren't Heaven's mail boy anymore?'

In all her rage, she took a step closer to punch Castiel square in the face. His skin was like stone: hard and cold. His face only tilted a little to the side, allowing her that satisfaction. Then he looked back at her, still scared. Aliza pushed herself up on her toes, trying to be as intimidating as possible.

'You are no better than those other douchebags! Now listen closely, you misshapen chicken. I don't ever want to see your face again! Show yourself to me, and I _will_ find a way to kill you,' she promised.

Aliza spun on her heels and headed down the street. In the corner of her eye she could see Sam moving in her direction, ready to follow. Before he could, she turned to him, pointing an accusing finger.

'Don't even think about it,' she growled between her teeth. Her voice sounded misshapen, like there was an effect placed over it. It made her voice sound dark and threatening. Sam was shocked, seeing her completely white, illuminating eyes.

Then she turned and ran.

* * *

Direction didn't matter. Destination didn't matter. But she needed to do something to get that angel of her mind. A small part of her brain was smart enough to lead her out of town, walking somewhere on a lonely road with fields stretched on both sides.

She could feel it, the transformation. Her whole body was boiling with anger. It changed everything: her voice, her eyes…even her mind. She felt as if there was no sense in calming down, ever. Why aren't people angry all the time? The heat felt good to her. In this moment, she could do anything. She fastened her pace and took a big leap. She crashed down on the path, leaving a small crater behind. The ground shook for a moment from the impact. Aliza smiled. She was invincible.

A nearby tree would be her next victim. She pulled the enormous log out of the ground with little difficulty, and threw it away. It hit another tree, who cracked under the weight and force. This time she didn't smile. This playing around wasn't enough to make her forget everything. She thought back of these blue eyes, and how they would look when he stabbed her to death. She imagined Cas looking down at her lifeless form and smiling at his good work. She knew she was making things up now, but she blamed that on the anger.

All the frustration made her exclaim a loud, terrifying roaring sound. It didn't even sound human anymore. It was more like a terrible monster. But that was what she was. A monster.

'Well, someone needs to cool down,' a voice suddenly said in the silence.

Aliza twisted her upper body to see behind her. A little further down the path, from the direction she came from, stood a girl. She was a little younger than Aliza, with red hair and a confident smile on her face.

'Go away,' Aliza growled. She couldn't see it herself, but her eyes glowed monstrously white.

The girl didn't seem intimidated. 'Neh. Figured you needed some help.'

Aliza couldn't believe the casual tone the girl spoke in. There was an actual monster in front of her, and she talked like she was a girl throwing up outside the club. The girl got her hands out of her pockets and came closer.

'Stay back,' Aliza warned, her hand held up.

The girl didn't stop.

'Stop!' she yelled. The sound was the least human sound she had made all evening.

Only now, the girl stopped. She blinked a couple of times, and looked like she was insulted. Aliza turned her face away from the redhead.

'I don't want to hurt you,' she said a lot friendlier.

There was a silence for a moment. Then the girl spoke again. 'You wouldn't. You can fight this. Be honest; you don't want to be like this. You are a disgrace to yourself. Man up! Or…uhm…woman up!'

At the same time, it angered her more, and calmed her more. She knew the girl was right. A part of her mind screamed that she needed to stop, while the other was still too heated up.

'You don't know what they did to me! I am alone, I have always been alone. But when I hear that there is someone else, my friend killed her! It's not fair!'

Her rage was so strong that she smashed her fist in the ground and caused some cracks. The girl took a step back when she was thrown off balance.

'Yes, yes. Life isn't fair. But guess what? Everyone deals with crap. You just have to deal with it, like anybody else,' the girl said. Her tone became more firm: she was done with this conversation.

Aliza became interested in the girl. Who would risk her life to talk to a hot-head like herself, and be totally used to seeing white eyes and supernatural powers? As she wondered about the girl, her anger subsided. She knew the girl was right: there was no sense in becoming angry.

Her eyes slowly faded back to their strange, non-mixing colors. The girl gave a chuckle. 'Damn! Your eyes are really cool!'

Aliza's heartbeat slowed down, her breathing becoming regular. She smiled a little. 'I hate my eyes.'

The girl took some steps closer, clearly not afraid anymore. 'Are you kidding? They're fabulous.'

She looked Aliza over, seeing that she had cooled down.

'How did you do that?' Aliza asked, barely a whisper. 'How did you calm me down?'

She shrugged. 'Dunno. Just talked to you, really. How about we grab a drink and talk this out? I'll pay,' she offered.

Aliza raised an eyebrow. 'Are you asking me out?'

The girl looked her over once more, without shame. 'No. Wouldn't dare.'

Aliza didn't buy it, but she really needed an listening ear. One that wasn't angelic.

'Right, 'cause I don't swing that way. I'm Aliza, by the way.'

The girl took her hand in a firm grip. 'Pleasure, Aliza. I'm Charlie Bradbury.'

* * *

The two girls walked over to a pub in town. It was somewhere between one and two O'clock in the morning, so the place wasn't very full. The bartender cleaned some glasses, a man with a beer in hand watched the news on the TV, and two other man had a quiet conversation in the corner. They decided to take a place away from all the others. Aliza ordered drinks. She already felt a lot better. Even when the man at the bar gave her a suggestive wink, she managed to ignore it and not get worked up.

'Thanks,' Charlie said cheerfully as she brought the drinks over. Aliza sat down opposite the new girl.

'So,' Charlie started, 'wanna talk about your feelings?'

Aliza snorted and toasted before taking a sip. 'Shut up.'

'Okay, now serious. I'm dying to know what you are. The way you couldn't control your anger…are you some kind of Hulk?' Charlie started. Her eyes were big with fascination.

Aliza leaned back. 'Wooh, calm down kid. I ain't no superhero. But, you seem to know stuff. I mean, you didn't freak out. What are you, a collector? Such a 'I live in my mom's basement and believe in aliens' kind of chick?'

Charlie looked insulted. 'No. I'm a hunter.'

Aliza stared her dead in the eye for a long moment, not buying it. Charlie sighed and started telling.

'Some other hunters dragged me in a supernatural issue, and I needed to help them. And you know, you don't really forget those things. They tend to keep clinging to you.'

Aliza nodded, agreeing with Charlie. She would never forget her first encounter.

'So, I am a hunter now. I have read all the books. I know about monsters and stuff. So, tell me. What are you?'

Aliza raised an eyebrow. 'You're a hunter. You're supposed to kill me, not help me.'

Charlie looked beaten, like she didn't know the answer to a hard question. 'I don't know why, but I kind of trusted you. Like, I had a feeling you were a good person.'

Aliza snorted again. 'You can talk about a special connection all you want, I'm not swinging that way.'

Charlie rolled her eyes. 'I know. I dropped that already. Not here to flirt, just to help. So come on, tell me!'

Aliza looked down in her glass. 'I'm also a hunter.'

Charlie didn't give a response, so Aliza looked up in her eyes. She was paralyzed for a moment.

'Seriously?'

'Yep.'

'But what else?'

Aliza smiled and leaned over the table, so she could talk on a lower tone.

'I'm half angel,' she told Charlie.

The girl her eyes grew huge. Two big orbs were staring at her. Aliza laughed.

'No idea why I'm telling you this. Guess I ran out of fucks to give. I have been walking around with that secret for some years now, and I just want to tell someone.'

Charlie didn't move as she spoke. 'You can tell me.'

Aliza looked the girl over. She looked like the right kind of person. A person freshly dragged into a hunter life, still exploring the details of it. She seemed innocent, and yet she was willing to believe the girl carried big secrets.

And so Aliza told her everything. About the death of her parents, about her life in the foster system, her time in college, her hunter life and figuring out what she was. She told her that she recently started hunting with two old friends, but she left the angel out. It was all a bit too painful, and she was afraid she would lose her temper again. But apparently, Charlie noticed she left something out.

'So what was it that got you so worked up?' Charlie asked at the end. She had listened with big interest and wasn't afraid to ask questions.

Aliza absently scratched her nails over the tabletop. 'Not sure I can talk about that.'

Charlie searched her mind for a solution. 'Okay, _who_ got you so worked up? Who's the guy?'

In an instant, Aliza sat back up. It was her time to stare with big eyes. 'How'd you know?'

Charlie smiled. 'Oh come on, it's obvious. So, is he human…or like you?'

Aliza dropped her astonishment. This girl was really smart. She gave a nervous chuckle. 'None of the above.'

'An…angel?' Charlie whispered, seeing how deep in trouble her new friend was. Aliza just nodded without looking at her. Charlie didn't know how to respond. After an awkward silence Aliza broke it.

'He keeps confusing me. At first, he liked me without knowing who I was. Then he figured it out and ran away. I thought he was getting his angel friends to kill me. But he ran for something even worse.'

Charlie raised an eyebrow. 'Worse than your death?'

Aliza stared back at the girl. Now that the anger was gone, she felt sad. Really, really sad. Her eyes watered and her vision blurred. 'He killed the only other Nephilim alive. I'm all alone.'

Charlie swallowed loudly. She sat back in her chair, looking tired and defeated. 'Wow, that's some serious shit.'

As Charlie had a moment to think, Aliza tried to push the tears back.

'But,' Charlie started, a little hesitant, 'do you love him?'

Aliza was taken aback from that question. So far she hadn't allowed herself to think about that. It was wrong to even consider. He was an angel, and he was supposed to hate her. But he didn't. He already confessed he had feelings for her. And after that he was afraid to tell her the truth. Afraid to hurt her, lose her. In fact, Castiel hadn't done one thing that would prove he hated her or would kill her. He only showed he cared.

So what was the answer? Did she love the angel? She immediately thought of all the problems it would bring. All the crap they would receive. Castiel would be in as much danger as she was.

But wasn't he already? Did that matter? Do those things weight up to these feelings she had?

'Yes,' Aliza said, surprised by her the conviction. 'Yes I love him.'

Charlie broke down in an 'awhh' sound. Aliza ignored how annoying it was. She was too lost in her own head to think. Now that she said it out loud, she started to see how badly she had fallen for Castiel. How much she needed him. She wanted him to be at her side in an instant. She could pray for him. But here, with Charlie, was really not the right time and place.

'Gosh, they're gonna laugh at me,' Aliza chuckled breathlessly.

Charlie looked confused. 'Who?'

Aliza waved the concern away with her hand. 'My hunting buddies. There are going to be some bad puns there. Especially Dean. He can't let that go.'

Charlie suddenly stiffened. 'Hold up. Dean? As in: Dean Winchester?'

Aliza looked up. It wasn't so strange that hunters knew about the Winchesters. 'Yeah. You know them?'

Charlie's mouth curled up in a big, wicked smile. 'Oh. My. God! We have been talking about the same hunters all this time! Sam and Dean were the ones who dragged me into this world!'

Aliza blinked a couple of times. Then she laughed half-hearted. 'Wow. I feel stupid now.'

'You and me both sister,' Charlie said cheerfully. As she looked away, a realization hit her. Her eyes grew big and she took a big gulp of air.

'Wait! I know! I know who you are talking about!' She leaned in closer, since she started to draw attention from the two men at the other side of the café.

'It's Castiel!' she whispered.

Aliza's cheeks burned red. She wasn't one to be ashamed easily, but this was a turnout of events she hadn't predicted. She gaped like a fish, trying to form words, but failing miserably. Charlie giggled like a little girl.

'Don't worry, your secret is safe with me,' she said. 'Although, I think you should tell him.'

Aliza swallowed. She should do that. She wanted to do that. But she was scared.

'I'd be alright,' Charlie cheered her up, seeing her mood drop. 'I never met anyone more capable of being with that guy. I bet you two make a cute couple.'

Aliza laughed softly at this dorky girl. She had to admit she grew really fond of Charlie.

'Alright. Let's go.'

* * *

 **My longest chapter so far! So much information, and feels...**

 **Okay, so I need to pull something straight. Some things don't add up in the timeline of Season 8/9. Cas did shut the gates of heaven by killing a Nephilim, but he is an angel now. I kind of needed both of these things to make the story work. From now on, this story will be set in S9, where they try to stop Metatron. Sorry for the confusion!**

 **What do you guys think of putting our favorite red-head in the story? I simply love Charlie, and Aliza needed some girltalk.**

 **Once again I want to thank all my lovely reviewers/followers/favorites. I squee every time I get a new response, so thank you!**


	16. Chapter 16

**Words and deeds**

* * *

 **Well...you know what kind of chapter this is. The usual warning of smut.**

* * *

Charlie wasn't talking while Aliza was driving. The radio was on and both girls sang along to the big hits of ages ago. They both agreed the new generation of music was crap, so they went crazy at Bohemian Rhapsody.

But apart from the singing, they didn't talk about matters. Aliza was nervous beyond anything she had ever known. The 'butterflies' felt like they were eating their way out of her stomach. It was maddening. So she hit the gas even harder as they sped back to the bunker.

On the other side of the massive steel door, the lights were on. It was somewhere between 3 and 4 O'clock now, but that didn't seem to stop the Winchesters. Sometimes Aliza wondered whether they found a magical solution to their need of sleep.

'Evening, gentlemen,' Aliza tried lighthearted.

Both boys looked up from whatever they were doing at the table. Mostly talking, it seemed.

'Brought a friend over, if you don't mind,' Aliza joked. She smiled mischievously as she threw her bag on the table showing the world map.

'What?' Dean said, at the brim of getting angry.

Then Charlie rushed down the stairs. 'Hey boys! Good to see you again!'

Slowly, a smile appeared on both of their faces. 'Charlie!' Sam called out before pulling her in a hug.

After she released Sam she moved over to Dean. 'Hey kiddo! What are you doing here?'

Charlie talked over his shoulder, looking at Aliza. 'Found a chick. Took her for a drink. Now she is taking me home with her.'

Aliza rolled her eyes, unable to stop the smile. She liked her humor. 'Shut it, little bitch.'

Dean looked over his shoulder at Aliza, raising an eyebrow. Aliza opened her mouth as she stared back.

'Seriously Dean?'

Sam tried to calm the situation down, clearly not in the mood in the middle of the night.

'Okay, okay. But how did you two meet?'

Charlie looked over at Aliza. 'Long story. Over some coffee maybe?'

Aliza looked down, then back up at the brothers. 'Where is Cas?'

They exchanged a look before Dean answered. 'In his room. Wouldn't come out to talk to us.'

Aliza felt a rush of guilt going through her. Dean noticed and stepped in her direction, to put a soothing but firm hand on her shoulder.

'Hey, don't feel bad. He was the one that did a bad thing.'

Aliza looked up in Dean's eyes. They were so soothing and friendly. She wished Dean was her big brother in that moment.

'I have to talk to him,' she stated.

Charlie looked at her with the smile that said: I know your secret and they don't. Sam saw it and tried to get Charlie to speak her mind. She wouldn't bail, though.

'Sure. It's in the east section, down the hallway to the end. Don't you want us to come? For support or something?' Dean asked with concern.

Aliza gently shoved his hand from her shoulder. 'No Dean. This is something between him and me.'

So, how long has she been standing in front of that door with her hand raised to knock? A second, a minute or an hour? She couldn't remember. In the very end, she managed to actually knock. Her heartbeat quickened even more.

She heard a shuffling noise from the room. Then the door opened. Cas stood in the opening. He had disposed his trenchcoat and overcoat, and now only wore the white shirt and blue tie. His shoes were gone too. His hair looked tousled, like he had been running his hands through it quite some times. His eyes looked wild and lost. And the moment he saw her, those emotions grew stronger with a mixture of fear.

'Aliza,' he said at last. He looked bewildered down at himself, searching for any dignity.

'Can I come in?' she asked, trying to keep her voice steady.

Cas stepped aside and let her in. The room was in the same state as the guy who stayed in it. The blankets were all over the bed. The TV was on, but Cas turned it off. Aliza closed the door behind her. Then she took a deep breath and looked Castiel over once more.

Seeing him in this state, devastated, broke her heart. She wanted to pull him in her arms and sooth him. Actually, she really wanted to kiss him again. His lips had felt so good. And he looked so flushed in this moment, it turned her on a bit.

'I…I apologize. I'm not decent, the place is a mess. I…I don't know-,' he kept on blabbering.

Aliza walked over to where he stood next to the bed. She took his shoulders gently, but he tensed completely. He was afraid. Truly afraid. She could almost hear his heartbeat. However, she pushed him down so he sat on the edge of the bed. She sat next to him.

'Cas, look at me,' Aliza said softly. Cas looked anywhere but her eyes, too afraid to face her. She took his chin between her finger and thumb, and kindly pulled his chin up.

'Look at me,' she said again. This time he did. His eyes looked so sad.

'Aliza, I am so sorry,' he said. She believed him completely. Truer words weren't spoken.

'I know that,' she told him, 'and I forgive you.'

Castiel gasped slightly. 'You…do?'

Aliza nodded. She tilted her head to the side, looking at Cas again. He looked back in her green eye and her blue eye. To him, it always looked like there was a kind, human side to her, displayed in the one eye, and the fierce warrior Nephilim in the other. Aliza was a matter of imbalance. No mix of two things: you got the one or the other. And slowly, he started to see he was on her good side now. She was so calm, in contrary to earlier at the burning house.

She moved her fingers away from his chin, to let them travel over his body. She stroked his neck, collarbone, shoulder and down his entire arm. Castiel enjoyed the feeling.

'In the end I saw that you never intended harm. You thought it was the right thing to do, even when you knew it was wrong. I'd like to deliver a personal punch in the face to Metatron might we find him, but not you. So far, you haven't done anything bad to me. Not intentionally, anyway. All you did, was protect me and safe me. But why, Cas? Why are you going against your basic instincts for me?'

Cas tiled his head and gave her the puppy eyes. In that moment, it took everything in her not to jump him.

'You know why. I already told you. I truly care about you, more than anyone else. Not the way I care about Sam and Dean…but different. More…personally.'

'I think the word you are looking for is intimate,' Aliza said. She surprised herself with how husky and flirtatious her voice sounded. She swallowed and licked her lips without noticing.

Cas had a hard time not staring at her lips. The way her tongue wetted those full, kissable lips…no. They were having a serious conversation.

'So…did you get angry?' Cas asked, his eyes cast downward.

Aliza didn't respond, so he looked back up. She was looking him over again, and it drove him crazy.

'I didn't kill anyone,' she whispered, clearly not interested in the topic.

Cas stared back at her. 'How did you get calm again?'

Aliza groaned and moved her head close in to Castiel. She hung her face inches in front of his.

'That is really not what I want to talk about.'

Cas swallowed. 'What do you want to talk about?'

Aliza smiled, and Cas could feel her lips stretch against his cheek. 'You don't ever shut up, do you?'

Before Castiel could give another meaningless response, Aliza closed the distance and placed her lips against his. At first he didn't move, too afraid she would blame him for everything. But when Aliza groaned in disapproval he did as she pleaded. He moved his lips against hers, giving little kisses and pulling away. Aliza moved her hand up his arm to his shoulder. The other hand did the same. She gripped him a little tighter, circling her thumbs over the stubble on his neck. Cas copied her behavior, but placed his hands in her hair instead. He stroked her scalp with his fingernails and tugged gently on her curls. Aliza moaned in approval. Her tongue pushed against his lips, and he gained her entrance. Their tongues circled at the same pace Aliza's thumbs and Castiel's fingertips moved. With all of that in rhythm, Aliza started to move her body along. She shoved her leg over the bed, to place it partly over his leg. There was some friction, closing in to his crotch.

Castiel gasped when she touched his cock for the first time. She took immediate advantage, biting down on his lower lip. Her mouth abandoned his mouth to trail down. She pushed his head back, so she could kiss along his neck, over his Adam's apple. Cas his mouth was open and he made little gasping noises. Aliza thought it sounded cute, and she smiled against his skin.

Her hands reached for the tie and undid the knot enough to get it over his head. However, when Aliza moved her hands around his neck Cas took the opportunity to push her down in the pillow. She fell back and looked up at the angel hovering over her. They both laughed like idiots before Aliza pulled the tie off.

Once again, they ended up staring into each other's eyes. In a flash Aliza thought back of Jimmy. Castiel was so different from Jimmy in any way, that she often forgot she already made love to this body. But the grace shining from Cas, made him look different even in the same body. Another thing that was completely different, was that Jimmy had been for fun. Having a good time.

Cas was for real. She never loved anyone romantically before.

In that moment, she was scared.

Castiel noticed the shift in her features. He held his body up on his elbows, and moved his hand over her cheek. He softly caressed her jawline.

'What's wrong?' Castiel asked, a little afraid she would quit on him.

Aliza's eyes racketed over his face. She seemed to be looking for answers. Then she inhaled deeply. Cas watched her chest move up and down.

'Nothing,' she smiled. The joy was back to her eyes. Cas noticed she had just let go of her worries.

'Is it because of Jimmy?' he asked, as the gentleman he was. Lines of worry painted his brow. Aliza placed her fingers on them, trying to smooth them away.

'No. I just realized something. I have never…been with someone romantically. Sure, I had short term relations, but they didn't mean anything. I didn't care about them the way I care about you,' she breathed. The words were hard to speak.

Cas smiled. A truthful, joyful smile on his lips. It was the most beautiful thing Aliza had ever seen.

'I truly care about you too,' he told her, forming the words with ease.

Aliza chuckled. 'How is it so easy for you? You're an angel. The last person you should be with is me.'

Cas sat up so he could move his hands under her sweater. He found the clasp of her bra and released her breasts. Aliza gasped when she felt his cold hand touch her under her shirt.

'I'm a rebel,' he said with a chuckle. That little mischievous smirk on his face in that moment, turned her on so badly.

Aliza smiled broadly as Cas worked his hands over her sensitive nipples. She still had the friction of her sweater, and wanted to get rid of it. She moved her hands to the edge of her shirt, but Cas pushed them aside and removed the piece of clothing himself. For a second he just stared down at her, enjoying the view. Then he bend over to start kissing her belly button. He moved his mouth over her belly, up to her breasts. He kissed her collarbone and sucked little marks in her neck. Aliza groaned and moaned in pleasure. Cas looked up at her, his eyes questioning.

'Am I doing this right?' he asked, unsure of himself.

Once again, Aliza humored herself with his dorky adorableness. She smiled and pushed herself up on her elbows, so her face was against his.

'When I make those sounds you are doing everything right,' she told him as a tip.

Her nose stroked against his. The feeling was tender like a feather. Those little intimate moments were a whole new world to her. Cas noticed how she loved the light touches. He moved his face up to kiss her on the head. Then on her forehead, traveling down to her nose. He placed a thousand little kisses on her cheeks and nose. Aliza smiled, happy about the contact.

'That's really sweet, Cas,' she encouraged him, 'but I am really turned on right now and I _need_ more friction. Or I'll go crazy.'

Cas took the suggestion on right away. He removed his shirt and trousers. Aliza enjoyed the view of an angel stripped down to his boxers. Damn, he was hot.

He gently pushed her back down in the cushions, and worked his way on her fly. On the little extra exposed skin, he kissed her. So far south to her lady parts was even more maddening. She bit her lip before a loud moan could escape. Cas pulled her pants away, leaving both of them in their last piece of clothing. He pushed her feet up, and started kissing the inside of her knees. His hands massaged the skin of her upper legs. His mouth travelled – way too slowly – up her leg. Aliza trusted her hips up, eager for some contact. She felt her knickers getting wet.

Cas lingered extra on the skin at the edge of her underwear. Aliza groaned in protest, and he removed the last piece of clothing. Once exposed, Cas placed his hand over her, cupping her. Aliza trusted up eagerly. He grabbed her and kneaded her flesh. Before she could protest again, Cas moved two fingers in her. He pushed in at once, without a warning. Aliza wasn't in time to muffle the load moan escaping her throat.

Cas was pleased with the sound she made, and wanted to hear more. He pushed in and out, first slowly, but picking up the pace. Aliza started to speak little words without meaning. Cas could only hear the sounds, but not make out actual words. After some time, he started to realize she was talking Enochian. Castiel hadn't ever heard these dirty words before in the old language, and wondered whether they were invented or whether Aliza just made words out of nothing.

It didn't matter: it turned Cas on even more. He moved his fingers out to replace them with his tongue. He pushed his tongue in deep, and tried to trust as hard as he could. The words coming from her made place for simple gasps and ' _yes'_ and ' _deeper'._

Cas was growing very hard in his boxers, and his cock begged for attention. He moved his mouth away and removed his boxers. Aliza sat up straight, and made it her time to push Cas in the pillows. Cas lay displayed on the bed. After decennia of existing, this was the first time he was this intimate. And it was addicting.

Aliza laid down on him, supporting her weight on her toes and elbows. She kissed Castiel again. There was no tenderness to the kiss now, she was lustful. And so was Cas. He placed one hand on her head, and the other on her bottom. He pushed her down so there was friction between their bodies. They both moaned in each other's mouths as Cas his cock rubbed against her lower belly. It started to become too much for both, so Aliza sat herself up. She grabbed his hard cock and placed it under her. In one motion, she sat down, shoving down his length. She exclaimed loudly in pain and pleasure. Castiel loved the sound and sight so much he nearly came at that moment, but he pushed himself to hold on a little longer. He wanted to move in her.

Aliza started riding his cock. She supported herself with her hands on his chest. Although the sight was wonderful to Cas, he was too far away from her. He moved up, and rolled them around, so he was on top. Aliza wrapped her legs around his back to get at a better angle. Cas trusted eagerly in her. He looked down and saw her eyes roll back in their sockets. Her breasts were bouncing on the rhythm of his thrusts. He groaned and started licking and biting on her ear. At first he was afraid to hurt her, but reminded himself she wasn't human. Her nails digging in the skin of his back was a reminder that is was okay. He talked on the lowest tone he could manage in her ear, speaking about how pleased he was with her there pinned under him.

His voice on that low, seductive tone, was her trigger point. She screamed loudly as she felt herself climax. Hot liquids streamed down over his member in her vagina. She told Cas he was the best goddamn being that ever fucked her and she felt him come too. He didn't even try to be quiet as he growled loudly in her ear. He collapsed on her, and she didn't mind. She loved all the places they were touching. She wrapped her arms protective around Cas, afraid to let go.

They both caught their breath, before Cas tried to move out of her. Aliza stilled him with her arms, begging him to lay still. Cas waited another minute before trying again.

'I'm not going anywhere. I just want to get my weight off you,' he assured her.

She succumbed, and let him pull out of her. The plop indicated he was gone and she suddenly shivered from the lack of contact. Cas pulled the blankets up and crawled under them, pressing himself to Aliza. She snaked her arms around his torso and snuggled her nose in his chest, inhaling his scent. Cas started stroking his fingers through her hair.

'That was magical,' Cas said at last. His voice sounded rough and still a little out of breath, and it was the hottest thing. Aliza smiled and looked up at his face. Then her face grew serious.

'I need to tell you something.'

Cas' eyebrows furrowed. 'What is it?'

'I..,' she started, but the rest was harder to say. Why was it so hard? It was obvious, wasn't it? She just had to form the words. But somehow, she was still afraid.

'I…I don't want you to go. I want you to stay with me,' she said. It was the truth, but just not what she meant to say. Not enough.

Cas smiled down at her. His face looked so calm and loving. 'I don't want to go anywhere else. I want to be with you too.'

Aliza snuggled her head back against his chest, not wanting him to read the worries off her face. Was that really all she could do? Always find another thing to worry about, even when things were good? Like, really good?

'So, did you notice you were talking in Enochian?' Cas suddenly asked.

Aliza was surprised. 'I did? Damn. I don't have any control over that shit.'

'I can teach you, if you want,' he offered calmly.

Aliza nodded against his chest. 'Yeah. I'd like that.'

Cas moved his head down so to bring his mouth closer to her ear. 'It was really hot, though. I really love to hear you speak in an ancient tongue with dirty words.'

Aliza chuckled. 'Gosh, I'm so weird.'

Cas laughed with her. 'Yes you are. So am I, remember?' He moved to lay on his back, and pulled Aliza on top of him.

'The angel and the Nephilim who fell for each other,' he spoke, thoughtful.

Aliza's heart skipped a beat hearing him _almost_ say he loved her. If he could do it, why couldn't she?

* * *

 **Are you satisfied with your story?**

 **After my last chapter I received some reviews saying you like Charlie a lot and would love to see more of her...yeah...**

 **I love Charlie and she will still be in the next chapter but then she is out of the main plot. So, enjoy it while she is here!**

 **I also noticed some returning reviewers! Glad to know you are still reading! Thanks for all the lovely words!**


	17. Chapter 17

**A true leader**

Cheerful sounds echoed all the way through the halls of the bunker. Charlie's return had lightened the path for Sam and Dean. Aliza was glad she had found the redhead – or she found her – since she brought the positive energy that they all needed.

Dean, Sam and Charlie were sitting at the dining table in the kitchen. The smell of burnt food hit Aliza when she walked through the door post.

'Mornin,' she greeted while ruffling her hand through her messy hair.

All three looked up with smiles on their faces.

'Morning sunshine,' Dean said happily. 'Look who's married to her bed.'

Charlie looked back at Dean. 'Not _her_ bed, I think,' she said with a wink.

Dean raised one eyebrow in confusion. Before he could ask what she mend, Cas walked through the door, looking equally ruffled.

'Morning,' he copied without noticing. The two new arrivals stood a little awkwardly in the middle of the kitchen.

Dean went from confusion to realization, and the transition was readable on his face. He went from a raised eyebrow to a full wide-eyed shocked look, to a slightly disgusted look to being confused again. The action of his face amused Aliza, and she chuckled softly, still feeling a little embarrassed.

'You two…you slept with…I'm gonna be sick. What?' Dean's reaction was afterwards.

Sam just had a big grin on his face. 'It became time.'

Charlie nodded vigorously. 'Oh yeah. You should have heard her talk about 'that one guy that-,'

'Okay! Enough for one moment,' Aliza cut in. She moved to sit down and started pulling some bread on her plate. Cas took the seat at the head of the table, not needing to eat. He kept looking at Aliza with his puppy eyes and stupid grin. Aliza pushed her hair for her face so she didn't have to suffer under his watch. However, she knew he was still looking and it made her on edge.

'Hold on a second. You two knew this was…that they were…I don't know. Interested?' Dean tried again, embarrassing mostly himself.

Charlie puffed some air through her nose. 'Duh, it was obvious.'

Dean looked over at his brother, who tried to continue his breakfast in peace. 'Come on, Dean. You know Cas, and you know he was acting differently since Aliza was around. He even came to us a couple of times, asking about Aliza.'

'Yeah, but Cas is Cas. He acts weird all the time. How am I supposed to know he had an eye for Aliza?' Dean complained.

'Why are you being so difficult about it?' Sam asked, a little annoyed by his brother.

Dean raised from his seat in heat. 'Maybe because he is an angel and she a Nephilim?! Sorry I'm concerned about it, but that is not natural!'

Cas finally lifted his gaze from Aliza. She felt released, but also missed it already.

'Thank you for your concern Dean, but you don't have to worry. Yes, angels are not going to approve us. But I ran from Heaven some time ago. I chose men over Heaven. What else can they do to me?'

Dean swallowed. 'They can hunt you down and kill you.'

Aliza looked up at Dean as well. 'Well, that would be funny. Heaven on his ass, Hell on mine. Really, that would only imply we are perfect for each other.'

She dared a glance at Cas from the corner of her eye. He was sitting there with a broad smile of pride on his face. He reached for Aliza's hand over the table and entangled their fingers. Then he lifted them and kissed the back of her hand. Aliza coughed in discomfort.

'You guys are a cute couple, natural or not. Honestly: this entire life is supernatural, so why wouldn't the relationships be?' Charlie threw in. Sam nodded in approval. Dean started to listen and sat back down.

'You're right. Sorry I freaked,' he told them, not happy having to say he was wrong.

'Apology accepted, Dean,' Cas said, his eyes never leaving Aliza.

They continued their breakfast with small-talk. Dean kept giving the new couple glances, which he thought were sneaky, but really weren't. At one point, Aliza had enough of people staring at her. She threw her piece of bread back on her plate and turned herself to Dean.

'Something you wanna ask?' she said with a fake smile.

Dean tried to play fool and pretend he didn't know she was talking to him. After a moment of silence and all the eyes turned on him, Dean gave in and spoke his mind.

'Is it weird to sleep with both Jimmy and Cas?'

'Dean!' Charlie and Sam protested at the same time.

Dean pointed his hand out to Aliza. 'What if you just miss Jimmy? Cas isn't Jimmy, you know.'

Aliza didn't answer. Instead she got up from her seat. Her move was slow but smooth. She was threatening in her entire body language. Dean felt a shiver going down his back. A moment flashed back in his head. She told him she was stronger than a human. He should fear her, was he wise.

'I am fully aware of the difference between Jimmy and Cas. Apart from their look, they have nothing in common. I don't know whether it is my origin, or whether I know Cas well enough, but I can see a different face on this man. And let's make another thing clear too,' she told on a low monotone voice. She leaned in over the table to get her face closer to Dean. He didn't back up or shrink down, but she knew him well enough to hide his dismay.

'I never loved Jimmy. He was a fling. Cas is different. This guy has been through the fire for me, and I would do the same for him. No, we ain't the role model couple, but our souls are connected in a way you can't possibly understand. I…,' Aliza stopped in her tracks, looking over her shoulder at Cas, who patiently waited for her. 'I care greatly about Cas, and I am not leaving his side. Heaven neither Hell can get us apart.'

Aliza sat back down. Cas placed a soothing hand on her arm, stroking a bit to show he sided her.

Dean stared off in the distance. He was nodding, but it was all an act. Aliza watched him for a moment before saying:

'But that wasn't what is really bothering you.'

Dean shook himself from his trance and looked back at the Nephilim. He stared at her for a long moment before getting to his feet and leaving the kitchen. The other four sat in the silence Dean left behind.

'So,' Charlie started awkwardly, 'bad time to ask who Jimmy is?'

* * *

Aliza and Sam walked out of the mortuary. The air outside felt thick, as if a lot of electricity hung in the clouds.

'So what do you think?' Sam asked her once they were out of hearing shot from the people walking in and out of the building.

Aliza searched her pockets for her car keys. 'Seems obvious to me: angel kill.'

They were investigating a series of murders, all died because their brains had melted and their eyes were smoked out. It happened more and more frequently.

'You think Metatron is behind this?' Sam asked while stepping into her Challenger.

Once in the car she turned the ignition and answered his question. 'Don't think so. It seems more like an angel going crazy. These guys are like lost sheep without their shepherd. Someone needs to pull them back together, and Metatron is obviously not concerned about the case.'

Sam nodded and looked down. 'Yeah, that's the problem.'

Aliza looked at him before driving away. 'What do you mean?'

'The leader. All previous leaders failed. I hate to say it, but Heaven was better before Michael and Lucifer got in the cage. Cas tried, but…' he stopped, hating to talk about Cas' time as God.

Aliza drove away, her eyes on the road. 'I know what happened.'

'But now he seems like the only hope,' Sam said with a big sight.

Aliza's eyes flickered between the road and Sam. 'Seriously? You think Cas should be their leader?'

Sam shrugged. 'Well, a lot of angels are willing to follow him. He questioned the authorities before and isn't afraid to take action. Those who are against Metatron look up to him now.'

Aliza snorted. 'I thought Cas was a rebel, like Lucifer. Or at least that is what the angels think.'

Sam watched her. 'Not all of them. Look, Aliza, I understand you don't like it. I mean, you don't want to lose Cas to Heaven, but-,'

'This has nothing to do with me missing him. This has to do, with angels finding out he is with me, and killing him for his sins! These feathered dicks can't be trusted!' she snapped back over his plea.

Sam remained quiet for a moment. 'I understand that. Which is why you can't be around him as long as angels are looking over his shoulder. And I know that is hard on the both of you, but there is really no other choice.'

'What about finding another leader?' Aliza said back.

'We have discussed that with Cas, but he doesn't think anyone is capable. The good ones have died and only weak or angels with the wrong intentions remain. Cas is-,'

'Cas has failed. He had his chance, and he blew it. He wasn't strong enough to face Raphael, and he won't be strong enough to assemble Heaven back to the way it was!'

Sam gave her a long, intense stare. She kept her eyes on the road.

'You don't think he can do it? Why?'

'Because, Sam, he isn't even a real angel anymore! He is weak, he has been amongst the humans for too long. He cares more about saving you, me and Dean than about the fate of this earth! That is not what a leader should be, blinded by the little so he doesn't stand for everyone,' Aliza spoke furiously. She didn't understand why Sam was so blinded by his friend that he couldn't see the truth.

Sam was quiet, he was thinking his words over.

'But he is the best we can get. Heaven is falling apart. There is no other solution,' he said calmly.

Aliza was done arguing, so both remained quiet for the rest of the trip.

* * *

Back in the bunker things got tense. Charlie had left, saying she had some important business to attend. Without her, Dean and Sam were getting on Aliza's nerves. Day in day out they tried to find a way to stop Metatron, a way to put the angels back in Heaven. But every plan they came up with, included Castiel as a leader of a new army against Metatron. The angel himself wasn't present for the duration of two weeks. He was god knows where, trying to find angels and show them how to live. He also wanted to stop Metatron. Luckily Cas was still believing he wasn't a capable leader.

Her strong opinion on this had nothing to do with her missing Cas. Sam and Dean kept blaming her for being blinded by loss if Cas were to stay in Heaven. Honestly, she never expected to have the angel's undivided time and attention. It was mostly Cas' lifestyle that bothered her. She hadn't lied to Sam when she thought Cas had tried and failed last time. He would be a good right hand, or an advisor…but the guy was no leader. The only ones that seemed to get that, were Aliza and Castiel himself. A lot of angels looked up to him by now, waiting for him to claim the throne.

After a long day of sitting and reading up on lore about Metatron, Aliza's brain was fried. She leaned back in the chair and let a long and deep breath escape. Sam looked up from his work.

'You done?' he asked, half interested.

Aliza looked away. 'Yeah. I'm really starving for that pizza.'

Dean had left to get them pizza's, mostly because he hated studying and did everything to get out of the bunker. It wouldn't be the first time he went out for pizza's but found a case instead.

Aliza found herself worked up. The long studying and the little progress it made, made her edgy on any comment. She ticked her nails against the table in a rapid frustrated rhythm.

'Dean won't be away long,' Sam commented on her nervous behavior.

Aliza snorted. 'Dean always stays away for a long time.'

Sam closed the book he was reading. He leaned his arms on the book and turned his attention to Aliza.

'What's up with you?' he asked, a little annoyed.

Aliza stopped ticking. 'Excuse me? Nothing.'

Sam didn't shift, didn't even blink. 'Is it still the issue of Cas being the leader?'

Aliza stared him dead in the eye. 'You talk as if he already is.'

'He will be! Aliza, this is nothing personal: this is about the faith of the planet and Heaven and Hell included. You can't be selfish,' Sam said with a raised voice.

Aliza moved out of the chair so quickly, Sam's eyes could hardly comprehend. She leaned in over the table. 'For the last time, this ain't about me! I care about the world too, and that is exactly the reason I think Cas _shouldn't_ be the leader!'

Sam didn't seem intimidated. 'If you would think clearly you would realize-,'

'I am so not explaining myself again,' Aliza said while turning away. She placed her thumb and index finger on the bridge of her nose.

'Maybe you should. So you can hear one more time how stupid it sounds,' Sam spat back, crossing his arms over his chest.

Aliza turned back to him and slammed her hands once more down on the table.

'Do you think it's smart to provoke me, Winchester? Do you really want me to get angry? They told me I would kill a human once. Why not speed up the process?!'

For a long and intense moment they just stared at each other. Sam was still angry, but he was also scared. Scared she _would_ turn mad. Aliza breathed heavily through her nose, nostrils flaring. In a single moment Sam swore he could see her eyes fading to a devilish white.

Then they noticed Dean had arrived. He stood there, petrified, at the other side of the table. He had three boxes of pizza in one hand and a small bag in the other. He just joined the staring competition.

Aliza looked from the one brother to the other and started to see the fear. Not so much fear of getting hurt, because honestly, a Winchester didn't even know what that was. It was fear for her. Fear she would lose her temper and do things she would regret. She closed her eyes and tried to count to ten.

'I didn't mean that,' she whispered with her eyes still closed.

Before Sam could reply, Aliza turned and went to her room.

'So, no pizza then?' Dean asked, not knowing what else to say.

* * *

Calming down was hard. Aliza sat in the middle of her bed with her legs crossed. Her arms rested on her knees. Her eyes were closed, her mind trying to be blank. But it was hardly possible. She was restless. There was a constant feeling in her gut that she needed to get up and do something, although she had no idea what. It was killing her.

She exhaled deeply, but the air came out unsteady. She was also still mad at Sam. Of course her treats had gone too far – she would never intend to harm either of the brothers – but she wasn't going to say he was right.

Then another feeling started to form. It was strange, not something a human would ever feel. Yet it already became a familiarity. She opened her eyes when the sound of wings and the feeling decreased. At the foot of her bed, stood her angel. He was wearing the same trenchcoat and suit as always. The slight vibration of angel grace and the pressure of his presence screamed 'celestial being'. However, his stance was sad and defeated. His eyes looked dark and tired. It was weird to see this mixture of angel and human features. Weird because it was so familiar to her.

'You look tired,' she remarked with a kind voice. Somehow the mere presence of Castiel calmed her down. He did in seconds what all her meditation couldn't do for hours.

Cas' eyes finally glanced up to meet hers. He gave her a devastated look.

'Metatron is driving me to madness,' he answered honestly.

Aliza shoved herself to one side and patted the bed next to her. Cas took a moment before he moved to sit at the edge of the bed. His feet were still on the ground and he turned his back half to her. His head lowered and he leaned on his elbows. Aliza shifted to sit behind him, straddling his body between her legs. Castiel's body stiffened. Then she placed her hands on the muscles in his shoulders and started massaging.

'Try to relax,' she whispered in his ear. It was partly to sooth him, but also to sooth herself by touching him. Being close to him.

'I saw my brother today,' Cas said after he tried to relax his muscles.

Aliza smiled. 'Which one? You have quite the family. You need to be a little more specific.'

Cas sighed. 'Gabriel.'

Aliza stopped rubbing his shoulders and turned her head around his shoulder so she could see his face. 'Gabriel is dead. You told me so.'

Cas looked up to meet her eyes. If he honestly saw his dead brother today being alive, he ought to be more cheerful.

'Metatron kidnapped me and let me believe I saw him. But it felt very real.'

Aliza pushed against his chest so he would turn to face her. 'Hold on. You were kidnapped by Metatron? What happened? How did you break free?'

Cas looked down once more. 'It's a long story. He is killing angels. The remaining angels want it to stop. They…want _me_ to stop him. To be their leader.'

Aliza stood up from the bed and started pacing around. 'No. Just, no. Cas, I know what they are saying, I know what Dean and Sam are saying, but you can't be their leader! No offence, but you are just not the right guy for the job!'

Castiel looked up at her in interest. 'Aliza, I-,'

Her finger nearly touched the tip of his nose when she pointed at him. 'No Cas, no 'buts'. Let someone else do it. I know you think there is no one, but I assure you, there are always people…or angels, who surprise you. Give it a shot. Anyone. Anyone but you,' she pleaded near the end.

Castiel moved from the bed to grasp her hands and look her in the eye.

'I don't want to be the leader of a rebellion against Metatron. Not any sort of leader,' he told her.

Aliza stopped to just stare back at him. 'Oh…really? Sam said you thought there was no one capable-,'

'No I don't think there is. But I am not the right person. I made mistakes in the past. I killed a lot of angels, Aliza. A lot of brothers and sisters. I will never be able to forgive myself,' Cas told her defeated.

Aliza couldn't possibly imagine what that was like. She wanted to sooth him, but honestly she was glad he saw it the same way. All she could do for now, was place a hand on his shoulder and lightly squeeze him as a sign of support. Cas placed his hand over hers.

'I will never abandon you for Heaven,' Cas said, and turned his head slowly back to facing her.

Aliza searched his eyes. 'What do you mean?'

'It is what you are afraid of right? That I will lead the angels and leave you behind?'

Aliza sighed in frustration. 'Not you too! Cas, the faith of Heaven stands above my personal needs. Yes, I want you at my side, but I have always known you can't be with me all the time. I know there are more important things.'

Cas placed his hand on her waist to pull her against his chest. 'There is nothing more important than you.'

Aliza's gaze switched between his eyes, which were too close to look at, at once.

'Cas,' was all she could whisper.

Castiel leaned in and pressed his lips softly against hers. It was sweet and tender. Aliza loved the careful gesture so much she felt herself get weak in her knees. Had she ever swooned over a guy before? Cas pulled back to look in her eyes for a second before crashing his lips against her once more, now with more force. He seemed desperate to kiss her, like he expected not to do it anytime soon.

Then he pulled back again. Aliza wasn't physically or mentally able to push him away. She let him take the lead, because she wasn't thinking straight. With all her might, she pushed her mind back to the discussion they had. She knew something and she had to ask.

'Despite the fact you don't _want_ to lead them, you are still going to do it, right?' she whispered.

Cas furrowed his brows together in confusion. Then his features relaxed as he saw she already knew.

'How did you know?'

Aliza pushed herself a little further away from his body. 'The kiss was too hungry. Too desperate. You're going to lead them and we won't see each other soon.'

Cas stood still for a moment before replying: 'I have no other choice.'

Aliza looked at the angel. He was so stressed and depressed. The weight of the world was literally on his shoulders. How could he carry it on his own? The answer is not. The problem is, who else can?

Aliza slid closer to absently fumble with his tie. 'I wish I could help you.'

Cas didn't look up. His eyes followed the movement of her fingers. 'I wish you could too. I wish we both weren't caught up in this and we could…watch Netflix.'

Aliza chuckled. Cas looked back up at her. A little bit of his cheerful self had returned. There was a small twinkle in his eye that she hadn't seen in a long time.

'I need to show you Doctor who. It's the best show ever,' Aliza said, trying to lighten the mood.

Cas scrunched his eyebrows together and let a little smile pull his lips up. 'Is that something with doctors and hospitals?'

Aliza smiled a toothy smile. 'Not quite.'

They both chuckled for a bit while looking each other in the eye. Then Aliza wrapped her arms around Cas and placed her cheek against his chest. Cas embraced her, and she felt totally save in that moment.

Unfortunately, the moment was short. There was a short, high tone ringing through the room. Castiel stiffened when it happened, full on alert. Aliza tried to listen, but couldn't hear another sound.

'What was that?' Aliza asked.

Cas looked down. 'You could hear that?'

Aliza pushed herself away from him. 'The zooming noise? Yeah, it was short but clear.'

Cas tilted his head to the side. Then he smiled. 'You don't seize to amaze me.'

Aliza hugged herself in discomfort. 'What was it then?'

Cas started pacing around her as he searched the room. 'A prayer.'

Aliza's eyes opened widely as she stared in the distance. 'I heard a prayer?'

He answered while he inspected the drawer by the bed. 'It was a message from Hannah. She is helping me out. She told me about a rumor Metatron is somewhere on Earth. I need to get back to the others.'

Aliza watched him move from the drawer to her closet. 'And with others…you mean your followers?'

Cas stopped searching and turned to face her. He held her shoulders in his hands. 'I really don't want to do this, Aliza. If there was any other way…'

Tears welled up in the corner of her eyes, but she wouldn't allow them to fall. She did what she tried not to do anymore: she shut her emotions away. The tears had no reason to fall anymore. Castiel could see she shut herself out.

'I understand,' she replied. It sounded confident, but not understanding. There was no emotion in her voice. It scared Cas how she could shut herself out like that.

Then his eyes caught something under the pillow on her bed. He reached for the angel blade he was looking for. He turned back to see Aliza staring at the wall. He stood in front of her, doubting whether to kiss her or not. But he didn't want it like this. She wasn't his Aliza right now.

'I will see you soon,' he said with the last shred of energy he had. He sounded exhausted beyond possible.

All he got as an response, was a small nod. Then Cas disappeared.

Aliza stood in that position for a long time. Time was hard to measure when her mind was racing around like a spooked rabbit. All the emotions got too much. Even with all her walls up, she could still feel the pain stinging at her heart. She had to admit it.

She didn't want to lose Cas.

Sam and Cas were right. It was, in the end, all about her selfish thoughts.

She wasn't ready to lose the only person that could love her.

But putting this on Cas wasn't fair. She couldn't be the whining girlfriend that begged him not to go to war. She knew what she was starting, she knew he wouldn't be around much. Yet that didn't stop the pain she felt.

But not just _her_ pain. She could also feel his pain. The pain of having to lead the angels into war, even when his last failure was still so painful. The pain of having to kill even more of his brothers and sisters. The pain of being torn between humanity and angels. Heaven and earth.

Her eyes snapped up out of the trance she was in. This had to stop. She _had_ to help Castiel. She couldn't fight in Heaven. However, she knew one thing she could do. It was dangerous, stupid, reckless and it would cause a lot of pain. She had to do it behind Dean, Sam and Cas their backs.

And if she succeeded, she could never be with Cas again.

But what _was_ more important? The fate of her and Castiel, or of earth and heaven?

* * *

'Sweetie, are you absolutely sure you want this? Not only are you working without the beloved Winchester duo, but you are also signing your own doom. I do not take deals without making sure you hold onto your part of the deal. So, are you sure? Do you want to shut the gates of heaven?' Crowley asked from his throne.

Aliza looked up at the king of Hell.

'I am sure.'

* * *

 **End of part four! it had eight chapters! At this moment my story is 165 pages long, and I am nearing the end!**

 **You guys still have some chapters to go.**

 **Please leave a review if you liked it! Or not. Honestly, why would you still read this story if you didn't like it? :P**


	18. Chapter 18

**Part five: loss**

 **Shutting the gates of heaven**

 _Forgive me Father, for I have sinned._

 _I honestly wouldn't know where to start. From quite early on, my life was a wreck. Greater forces kept pushing over the houses I had built. Each time they would blow in the wind. The friends I made would fade. Never have I belonged._

 _My life described in one word, would be messy. I throw myself from the one place to the other. I never fit in. Always the new one. The weird one. However, I am not the only person on this earth that faces those struggles. I also don't want to say my life is 'harder' than others. I am simply different. So different, that I am literally one of a kind._

 _I'm not trying to suggest my life was useless. I don't think anyone else could have taken this burden to bear. Maybe that is why I was chosen. I lived the best I could. I tried to help people. I killed the monsters of this world. I still don't understand why those things should exist if You really created everything, but then, there is much I do not understand. Meanwhile I just try to live my life to the fullest._

 _Saving people._

 _Hunting things._

 _At long last, I have found myself in a position I can't save myself from. The world is crumbling apart. My friends are trying to fix it, but they can't. I know all three are trying so hard. But this time, the weight shouldn't be on their shoulders. Lay it onto mine._

 _I need guidance. Please, if You are listening, send one of your angels. Send an angel to guide me on the path of light._

 _Amen._

Aliza opened her eyes. She was met by a green field, overgrown with colorful purple flowers. For a long time everything remained quiet. She got up from her sitting position and started circling the clearing. Minutes passed, and Aliza enjoyed the quiet and peace.

'Well, I just _had_ to see this for myself,' a voice suddenly said.

Aliza turned around, slow and carefully. There, at the other side of the clearing, were two men. The one wore a light grey suit with stylish hair. He was only the wingman to the other guy. The other man was a lot shorter, with messy grey hair. His eyes were huge, like they tried to see every little thing that happened around him. He wore simple clothes, like a dusty librarian that didn't get out much.

But his appearance didn't cover who he was.

'You're Metatron?' Aliza asked, a little edge of surprise to her tone.

The corners of his mouth curled up, leaving big wrinkles on his features. 'You expected me to be different?'

Aliza pushed her hands in her pockets and absently kicked a flower. 'Maybe something a bit more intimidating.'

The smile disappeared, and he instantly seemed offended. He didn't dwell on it, though.

'I must say, I didn't expect you to call out to us. You must know we could feel what you are when you prayed,' Metatron replied, taking careful steps forward. His minion followed him.

Aliza pulled a face and looked away. 'Yeah, I did.'

The small angel pulled an eyebrow up. 'A Nephilim. The only Nephilim I take it. Strange though, how often I lately run into your kind. But I bet you are the last one.'

Aliza didn't seem bothered by the approaching angels. 'You killed the last one,' she said on a low, threatening tone.

Metatron raised a little finger in the air and both stopped walking. 'Ah, you're wrong. That was Castiel.'

'You tricked him,' She quickly added.

Metatron looked her over. Once, twice…three times.

'Ey, I'm not for sale,' she said annoyed.

'Wait a second,' he whispered slowly. Then a wicked grin spread on his face. 'You are defending Castiel. I bet you know him. Very well, I'd say. Castiel seemed…distracted last time I invited him over. But he wouldn't…would he?'

Aliza didn't respond, but if looks could kill…

Metatron gave a little giggle of delight. 'He did, didn't he! You two…owh, the lines that angel has crossed.'

Aliza looked away. 'Enough. I want you to do something.'

'Me?' he asked surprised with a hand on his chest. 'You think I will do something for you?'

She looked the angel deep in the eyes before answering. 'I want you to shut the gates of Heaven. But this time, with the angels inside.'

Metatron stared at her for a long moment. Both kept a straight face, until Metatron cracked and started laughing.

'Oh you can't be serious.'

'I am. I can offer you something you want,' she told him.

'And what would that be?' Metatron asked while crossing his arms.

'Me,' she replied, 'dead.'

He looked taken aback, but didn't respond.

Aliza paced back and forth. 'I am an abomination, am I not? You want me dead. All angels do. How do you think the angels will react when they heard you had the chance to kill a Nephilim, but didn't? Who would follow you then? Plus, for the gates to shut, I need to die anyway. No more Nephilim. No more me.'

He kept looking at her with an amused smirk. 'Tempting.'

She held her hands out. 'So, we got a deal?'

He laughed again, and then he came closer. Once up close, the guy was really short. Aliza wasn't tall, like at all, but this was a new definition of short. Yet, he could crush her easily.

'I think you are missing something, darling,' Metatron told her.

'And that is?'

He chuckled some more. 'I don't need to make a deal. Why would I give you so much power? I can easily kill you here and now.'

Aliza leaned in closer to his face. 'Then why don't you?' she whispered.

'I try to keep my hands clean,' he replied while turning and walking away. He looked back over his shoulder. 'However, Muriel here has no desire to do so.'

Aliza looked at the other angel for a second before she heard the flapping of wings and Metatron had disappeared. Muriel pulled an angel blade from his inside pocket and started to move in closer.

Aliza looked at the angel full of fear. She tried to back up, but a large tree was blocking her way. The guy closed in and heaved the blade to strike down on her. The blade raced towards her face. In the very last minute, her arm shot up and twisted his wrist. He dropped the blade in pain and surprise. Aliza moved quick as lighting, catching the blade. She grabbed the angel at the front of his shirt and pushed him into the tree. In a flash of silver, the blade made a clean cut across his throat. He gurgled in pain. Aliza moved a little vial up to the wound. After a little moment, the wound started to leak. Not blood or body fluids, but a blinding blue liquid that swirled in the air. Angel grace.

The grace swirled into the vial. Aliza closed the lit and put it away. Muriel seemed to have regained his strength and pushed her off him. However, now being human, he struggled to keep upright.

'I am sorry about this,' she told him. 'I need it too badly. If you leave now and not go running back to Metatron, I will let you live.'

The angel looked startled and scared. He franticly searched his body for any remaining grace. Then he found a stick on the ground.

'There is no use to being a mortal,' was the first and last thing he said to her. Then he drove the sharp stick down between his ribs, piercing his heart.

'No!' Aliza screamed. She stumbled over to his body and tried to pull the stick out, but it was stuck. The guy looked up at her, tears in his eyes. In his last and most painful moments, he felt the most fear and pain he ever knew.

Then he died. Aliza knelt next to him and held his hand in hers.

'I am doing this for the good of everyone. In the end, you will be grateful,' she whispered.

Then she stood and moved away from the clearing as quickly as she could, since more angels would come.

* * *

The man in front of Aliza eyed her over. There was a look of disgust on his face, and Aliza got the urge to sniff her clothes. However, she knew it wasn't her smell he found disgusting.

'He will see you in a bit. You will remain here,' he said, before leaving in a hurry. His hands were balled up in fists, refraining himself from attacking Aliza.

Aliza leaned against one of the massive pillars of the room. Last time she was here she hadn't paid attention to her surroundings. She had walked through the hallways with two shotguns, shooting every person that tried to stop her. Now she took a better look. It was dark in this room, apart from a faint light shining in through the windows. The windows were at ground level, since this place was the basement. The place reeked of dead things and the metallic smell of blood. There were instruments of torture in the corners of the room, some covered in fresh blood. At the far end of the room was a throne, protruding above the ground level. It had a complicated design, and it looked centuries old. The throne was the only thing in the room that was not covered in dust or blood.

The place kind of looked like Hell.

'So the Lassie found her way back,' someone said behind her. Aliza twisted her head, still leaning against the pillar. She didn't really need to see him: that voice was recognizable out of thousands.

'You call me Lassie one more time and I will cut your tongue out and make you eat it,' Aliza said with a low seductive voice, still looking halfway over her shoulder.

Crowley chuckled as he moved closer to her, so she could see him. He leaned in closer to her ear to whisper: 'Love it when you talk dirty. Touches me right were my bathing suit goes.'

Then he walked towards his throne. 'It amuses me how you overrate your power here.'

Aliza pushed away from the pillar and walked to stand in front of him, slightly looking up at the king of Hell.

'I assume you succeeded then, if you are back,' Crowley said once he sat.

She stared at the demon a little longer before pulling the vial out of her pocket. The angel grace swirled inside.

Crowley leaned forward in his seat. 'Wow. I didn't think you had the guts. Is it dear Cassie's?'

A shiver went down her back by the mentioning of Castiel. She felt like she was betraying him. She probably was. But in the end, this would be the solution.

'Oh, let me guess. You took a chapter out of the Winchester handbook and didn't tell him about this deal. Makes sense, I don't see Castiel agreeing to any of this,' Crowley rasped on.

Aliza put the grace back. 'You got the bow then?'

He smiled. 'Wasn't hard at all. You find one of these idiots in diapers and question them for a bit. Don't think it took me longer than twenty minutes. Including strapping the moron to that machine over there and dragging him back out afterwards,' Crowley said while pointing to the machine she had noticed had fresh blood on it.

'You son of a bitch,' she swore under her breath.

The next second Crowley had a small bow in his hands. It was made out of white wood, and carved in beautiful curves.

'Now, all we need is the spell,' Crowley said while admiring the bow. 'I believe Metatron still has it. We need to confront him-,'

'He isn't the only one that has it,' Aliza said. Her voice was strong, but without emotion. She couldn't turn her emotions back on now. She would fail her task.

'And that is?'

Aliza just stared at Crowley for a long moment. She had to tell every cell in her body to not start crying or break the deal.

'Castiel.'

* * *

After the second round of knocking the door finally opened. Dean stood at the other side.

'Where the hell have you been?' he asked Aliza, who stood in the pouring rain outside the motel room. They had to pack and move, because they were on a new case. Sam had left their location to her at her voicemail. Like, twenty times over.

Aliza stepped past the oldest Winchester into the warm motel room. She shivered and kicked her boots off.

'Around,' she replied.

'For six days? Without leaving anything behind to tell us you are okay?' Sam said concerned.

Aliza looked up at Sam, and was reminded of their conflict last time. She searched his expression for anger or disgust, but he didn't show any.

'Sam, I'm sorry. I didn't mean what I said,' she said, her eyes big of guilt.

He held a hand up. 'That is forgiven and forgotten. But not this. Tell us, where have you been?'

Aliza sighed and dried her hair with a towel that was thrown over a dining chair.

'I followed a lead. Nothing big, thought I could take care of it myself.'

'You could have told us that,' Dean said, crossing his arms.

Aliza made an exaggerated gesture. 'You are right Dean. Sorry about that. But honestly, I don't need babysitting all the time.'

'We know. We just want to know when you are chasing a case and when you are being tortured. Can we make that a deal?' Sam asked.

Aliza stuck her thumb up. 'Deal. Now, do you know where Cas is?'

The question took them back. 'No, he is off. Doing angel business,' Dean replied.

She turned to face Dean. 'Can you try calling him?'

'Like praying you mean? Why can't you?'

Aliza shrugged. 'He isn't answering mine. Figured he would come for you.'

Dean waved his arms around. 'Why does anyone think I am the only one he comes for?'

'Hello Dean,' someone said from behind Dean.

He turned around to find Castiel standing in the corner of the room. 'You called?'

Dean looked back and forth between Cas, Sam and Aliza. 'Are you kidding me?'

Castiel tilted his head to the side. 'What is wrong Dean? Didn't you call?'

Aliza stepped around Dean. 'No, he did. Or actually, I did. Why aren't you answering me?'

Cas looked down. 'I thought your call wasn't an emergency. You…send me some personal thoughts with that prayer. I am too busy to come for…that.'

Aliza blushed. 'Oops.'

'Oops?' Dean replied, clearly not wanting to be in on this topic.

Aliza turned around to him. 'First prayer. Don't really know how it works yet.'

'So, why then did you call?' Castiel asked her, stepping further into the room.

'We need to talk, in private. It is important, not personal,' she added quickly.

'Then why can't we be in on the subject?' Dean asked.

Aliza turned her head around to him. 'Because I say so.'

She never intended that to sound so poisonous. She could see the pain flashing in Dean's eyes before he shut it out. Aliza started to hate herself more every second of the way. She had to keep in mind that she was saving the world. The path was lonely and painful, but she figured it always was. If she looked at Cas, who tried to do the same, that idea was confirmed. They were both tired from the fighting, and just wanted peace. But peace was what they were fighting for. Even if her peace couldn't be with Castiel, or even on this earth.

'Cas, take us somewhere private,' she whispered to him.

The next moment they were in another room. Aliza could see through the window that they were still at the same motel, but in another empty room. Apparently the honeymoon suite.

Aliza chuckled. 'You have style, Cas.'

'What is so urgent?' he asked, feeling very sleepy. He sat down at the bed with a big sight. Angels didn't sleep, but she could imagine this one delving into the blankets and sleep a hundred years.

Aliza picked up a chair and sat opposite him.

'The spell Metatron spoke to shut the gates of heaven, do you still have it?'

Cas was back in a lively posture. He narrowed his eyes at her. 'Why do you suddenly ask about that?'

Aliza tried her best to look enthusiastic. 'Because I might know a way to break the spell.'

Castiel's eyes went around like wild beasts. 'How?'

Aliza leaned back a little. 'I know a warlock. He is not like a regular witch, he is much stronger. He rules over New York City. I have laid contact with him, and he thinks it is possible to reverse the spell. To open the gates again, and let the angels back in. But he needs to take a look at the spell to do it.'

Castiel stared at her intensely. It was his thing. But this time it wasn't romantic. He doubted her. He searched her for lies.

'I don't think a witch, doesn't matter how powerful, can perform something so magnificent,' he simply replied.

Aliza sighed once, but tried to keep the joy in her eyes. 'Maybe he can't. But he is a master of spells. Maybe he can see a way to do it, so that someone else can do it. You, for example.'

Cas looked away from her. Aliza gave a small sigh of relief to have his watchful eyes off her. She felt like he could read her mind.

'Maybe that could work. However, I do not think Metatron designed these spells to be reversible-,'

'But we can at least know that for sure,' Aliza cut in.

Castiel looked back up at her. His look was still doubtful, but he seemed to agree. There was a short tingling feeling in her hand, like it had gone numb, before she felt something had appeared in it. She carefully opened the piece of paper in her hand. On the paper were words in Enochian. She still couldn't read the language, but from time to time it looked like a word would change into an English word for a second and then turn back.

'Thank you Cas,' she said, and then looked back up, 'for trusting me.'

Castiel showed a smile. 'Of course I trust you. You mean everything to me.'

He took her hands between his, crushing the paper a bit. She looked up in his eyes, and swore she could see them water. The sudden golf of love he send her way crashed into her wall of guilt, and it was nearly enough to make her say the truth. She tried her best to hold back the tears, but couldn't stop one single tear streaming over her cheek. Castiel noticed it and wiped it away with his thumb. Then he just held her face in his hands.

How could she possibly be romantic towards him now? She was lying and deceiving him.

'This time isn't easy for me. A lot of it is a reminder of my failure earlier. I don't want to be the leader, but the angels seem to be falling apart without me. I am walking a thin line, and I can easily fall every moment,' Cas started telling her. He looked back up in her eyes and smiled happily. 'But then I think back of you. I think about what I fight for. I fight for peace, so that we can watch Netflix and that doctor show while I hold you in my arms. Of course, our lives will never be that easy. There will always be hunts, and bad guys to defeat. But there will also be good moments. And that is why I can keep going. That is why I can be a leader even though I am not the right person. I do all of this, for you.'

Aliza broke. The tears she tried to hold back earlier flowed richly down her face. She was sort of laughing and sort of crying, she didn't even know what she was doing. Castiel looked confused, and franticly tried to do something. Aliza just stood and pulled him up with her, to hold him close in an embrace. She buried her face in his chest, not being able to stand those adorable and lovesick eyes of him any longer.

His message to her went both ways. Of course it was heartbreaking to hear him say those things. She didn't want anything more than to have a life with Castiel. And to think, that the very thing she was doing, would keep that from happening.

On the other hand, he confirmed what she already suspected. He was fighting for _her._ He wasn't fighting for the good of earth, or heaven. He was fighting for her. And that, made him a bad leader. That made him incapable of winning this fight. All Metatron had to do, was threaten her, Dean or Sam, and Cas would drop everything and surrender.

'I don't know what to say,' she whispered honestly. The most of her sobbing was over now, but her face was still flushed and wet.

Castiel kissed the top of her head. 'You don't need to say anything. I just wanted to tell you.'

Aliza composed herself and took a step back. She wiped at her face, trying to make herself stop crying.

Cas looked around the room while he was thinking.

'What?' she asked.

Cas looked back at her, and gave her a mischievous smile. 'Wait here. Don't go away.'

Without another explanation, he left. Suddenly the silence seemed deafening. Aliza decided it was a good moment to take a hot shower, trying to let her worries stream away for a moment. If she understood him good, he would be back to spend some time together. Was that a good thing? She still felt guilty, and it wouldn't go away. But on the other hand, this was probably her last night with Cas.

Better make it count.

Twenty minutes later she stepped out of the small bathroom, only wearing a towel. There was a moment of surprise when she spotted Cas on the bed. His shoes, socks, trenchcoat and overcoat were off. So was his tie. The top buttons of his shirt were undone. He had draped himself in a sexy laying position, and looked at her with a hungry expression.

Aliza gulped. Only that sight was nearly enough to give her an orgasm.

'You look so good,' he said as low and seductive as he could. Aliza couldn't help a small giggle escaping her. He had probably looked up 'how to be seductive for dummies' and would try some techniques.

He gestured for her to come closer. Aliza obeyed without complaint. She crawled over the bed, one hand holding the towel at its place. Cas sat up to receive her. He placed a hand on her jaw and pulled her face in for a kiss. Cas kissed with passion and lust. He moaned just before he pulled back. Aliza moaned herself because of his noise. Cas smiled fondly.

'So that is a good thing to do. Interesting,' he mused as his hand stroked up and down her arm.

Aliza moved her leg over his body, so she was straddling him. He looked up in her playful eyes. She pulled the towel a little tighter so she had her hands free to undo his buttons. Once his shirt was off she gave him little kisses all over his torso and neck. Then the kisses turned into love bites. Cas moaned again, and Aliza moaned in reply. She went ever lower to stuck her tongue in his belly button and to the edge of his trousers. She could obviously see his hard member pushing against the fabric. She let her hands brush against him over the fabric, causing Cas to jerk up.

'Get it off,' he ordered through his teeth.

Aliza looked back up at him. 'You tortured me last time. Now, Mommy will do as she pleases.'

With painful slowness, she undid his belt and zipper, and tugged the pants down. Cas his breath was very audible. Every now and then he tried to move his hand to remove his boxers, but Aliza would slap them away. She kissed all the way around his last piece of clothing.

'Aliza, enough,' he panted.

Aliza decided to help him, and ripped the boxers off as fast as she could. Cas was so taken aback by the motion that he shot up from his position and pushed Aliza into the wall. There were a couple of cracks in the wall as she hit it.

'Getting wild, are we?' she teased.

Cas was beyond teasing. He placed his hand over her heart, feeling her quickened heartbeat for a moment before sliding it down and ripping the towel away. Aliza gasped at the slight cold that licked her body. She wasn't cold for long though, since Castiel covered her body with his. He placed his hands under her thighs and hoisted her up against the wall. Without warning, his hard cock entered her. Aliza slapped a hand over her mouth to muffle her moan. Cas his hands held her hips as he grinded into her rapidly. His face was tense and focused, trying to maintain a rhythm of trusts. Aliza placed a hand under his chin to make him look up in her eyes.

'Look at me when you are fucking me,' she ordered.

Cas smiled again. He kept staring at her as her eyes tended to roll back in their sockets. Cas his breath became shorter, so to announce his climax coming. Aliza pushed herself away from the wall, so they both fell back on the bed. Cas was startled for a moment, before sliding out of her so they could move. Aliza let herself fall into the cushions as Cas crawled over her. He took a small detour to let his tongue slide over her breast. Then he opened her legs and pushed himself in again. This time Aliza was more prepared, so instead of screaming she simply moaned. She wrapped her legs around his lower waist and pushed herself up to him in trusts. Cas pushed back in the same movement. Without noticing, Aliza started to say things in Enochian again. Cas liked the dirty talk, and started to talk back in the ancient language. Aliza was startled to understand what he was saying. His low, seductive voice groaning in her ear drove her insane. Castiel trusted once more and she hit her climax. Cas looked a little lost as he tried to keep pushing in her. Aliza helped by groaning back in his ear, and Cas came too.

* * *

Aliza stared out of the window with Cas spooning her. He wasn't asleep, but he insisted on staying a little longer, so she wouldn't feel like he just came for the sex. In fact, Aliza enjoyed this little moment even more than their heated actions. Or, she would enjoy it, if she wouldn't get eaten up inside with the guilt.

'This is something we should do more often. I really like holding you like this,' Cas said in her ear. He send a wave of goosebumps down her body. He was so close he brushed his lips against her ear shell.

'Yes, I like it too,' she answered. Luckily her face was turned away from Cas, otherwise he could see her empty expression.

Cas sighed. 'I need to go back.'

'I know,' she whispered back.

He took another long moment to hold her close, before moving out of the bed. Aliza kept staring until a fully clothed Cas stood in her line of sight. He looked down at her with a loving smile. She looked back up and tried to smile. He stroked some hairs away from her face.

'I will see you again really soon,' he promised.

She stared up in his eyes. This would be the last time she would see them. Maybe Cas could visit her in heaven….if she would be allowed into heaven. The thought chilled her even more.

'Looking forward to it,' she replied with a cheeky smile.

Cas smiled. That was all she needed. The last memory of Cas to be his smile. Then he disappeared, for the very last time.


	19. Chapter 19

**Sacrifice**

Dean woke the next morning with a strange feeling in his gut. He never slept properly, but this night was even worse. He sat in front of the small TV, eating cereal. Why did he have this weird feeling? Was someone trying to warn him? If that was the case, it worked. He would be ready for an army of ghosts storming through the door at that moment.

'Morning,' Sam said while yawning.

'What is wrong, Sammy?' Dean asked, his eyes never leaving the TV.

Sam pulled an eyebrow up. 'What do you mean?'

Dean finally looked up at his brother. Sam looked as bad as he did himself. They were tired. This Metatron problem had been haunting them for too long. Dean could handle the shapeshifter they were currently trying to kill, but that constant pressure from heaven was too much for them. Dean felt like the sky could literally crash down on them any second.

'I have a feeling something bad is gonna happen,' Dean replied.

Sam chuckled as he sat down and poured himself an own bowl. 'Yeah, something bad happens all the time in our lives, Dean.'

Dean stared at the movements Sam made with his hands. 'This is different. We should be ready.'

'For what?'

'Not a clue,' Dean replied nonchalantly.

Sam shook his head and stuck the spoon with cereal and milk in his mouth.

'Did you hear anything from Aliza or Cas?' Sam asked.

Dean slowly shook his head. 'What could she want to tell Cas, but not us?'

'Aliza hasn't been herself these days,' Sam replied.

Dean finally looked him in the eye again. 'What do you mean?'

Sam put the spoon down and looked away, searching his memory. 'We don't know Aliza for that long, so it is kind of hard to tell, but she seems different. Yesterday for example, coming in after disappearing for six days and not explaining a thing. But actually, this all happened since she realized Cas was going to be the leader of an angel army. She can't stand it, and I think she is still trying to find a way around it. She doesn't know how to handle the feeling of being alone. Again.'

Dean stared his brother in the eye. 'I don't believe she would put herself in front of the world. She knows better. She is a hunter after all.'

Sam sighed. 'I'm not saying that. I just think…she wants to help him.'

Dean looked confused. 'She knows she can't. She is a Nephilim. She shouldn't be involved with heaven. Or angels.' Dean diverted his eyes.

Sam looked good and hard at his brother. 'Why are you so against Cas and Aliza?'

Dean wouldn't look back or reply for a long time. Anyone would think he wasn't going to reply, but Sam knew better.

'It feels weird,' he finally said.

'What does?' Sam asked him patiently.

Finally, Dean decided to face his brother. He had a rare expression on his face. He was showing his soft side. Sam knew not to say one word wrong, or he would put all the walls back up.

'Don't you feel like Aliza is like a sister? Maybe you don't because you can't remember her as a kid, but I do. She feels like a little sister, and Cas…Cas is like a brother to me. That is why it is weird.'

Sam did not see that coming. He blinked a couple of times, trying to find a reply. Anything. But honestly, he saw what Dean mend. He wasn't going to feel the same way about it, but at least he understood Dean now.

Before things got too awkward between the two, there was a distraction. Castiel announced his arrival with the flapping of wings.

'Cas!' Dean gladly said when he saw the angel again. 'Good timing.'

Castiel scrunched his face up in confusion, but found it unimportant enough to ask.

'Hello Dean. I can't stay long, I just wanted to give something back to Aliza. Is she here?'

Sam walked to the little kitchen to wash the bowls. 'No, haven't seen her since you two left. What do you want to give back?'

Cas put his hand in the pocket of his trench coat and pulled out a small metal coin on a string. He caressed it like it was fragile. 'Aliza left her necklace behind on the nightstand yesterday night and I wanted to take a look at it. After that I completely forgot I had it.' He smiled down at the necklace, fond memories forming in his head.

Dean looked awkwardly away. 'So instead of talking about important business, you two decided to fool around tonight.'

Castiel looked up at Dean. 'We did discuss something important. She might have a way of helping me.'

Sam walked back in the room. 'Really? And how is that?'

Cas looked from the one Winchester to the other, deciding whether to tell them. In the end he decided to go for it.

'Metatron used a spell to shut the gates of heaven. Aliza has a warlock friend who wants to see if there is a way of reversing it.'

Both brothers looked at the angel for a painful long time. Cas was all cheered up, happy to see another way out. Clearly, the boys thought differently about it.

'Cas,' Sam said slowly, 'Magnus, her friend, died a month ago.'

Cas his features slowly sank back to a unhappy look. 'Are you sure?'

Sam and Dean shared a look. Aliza had told them about her warlock friend from New York. A little while ago there seemed to be some problems, and the mighty warlock had died.

'Why would she lie to me?' Cas asked rhetorically. His eyes dropped as he continued to stare at the floor.

Dean took the charm Cas was holding. 'Because she is doing something stupid. Something she thinks is right.'

Cas looked up at Dean through his eyelashes. 'Why do you think so?'

Dean inspected the coin. 'This is enchanted. She had it to keep demons at a distance. It was a present from Magnus. Wherever she is, it includes demons.'

Cas stared at the necklace. 'I took it. She didn't give it to me or leave it behind.'

'Something this important you don't put away on a drawer. And you most of all don't forget about it.'

'Okay,' Sam broke the conversation, 'but what would she be doing? It has to do with Metatron, right? That is what got her so worked up, Cas being the leader.'

Castiel looked at the ground as he found the answer. His eyes grew big in fear.

'She is going to shut the gates of heaven.'

Both brothers looked at the angel. 'What?'

Cas looked up. 'She asked me for the spell. The spell to shut the gates. She was never going to reverse it, she is going to do it again. But this time, she will lock the angels inside.'

Dean and Sam shared a look. 'But that means you could never be together again,' Sam said.

Cas grabbed the necklace back from Dean and started walking around, packing their bags for them. 'You are forgetting she needs to die for that to work,' Cas said coldly. This wasn't going to happen. He needed to stop her. He retrieved in his mind and called out for Aliza, hoping she would show her location or give any response. 'We need to find her.'

Dean pulled his coat on when he responded. 'I know which demon she is with.'

* * *

'My Enochian is a bit rusty, but I will manage. You just stand there and look pretty,' Crowley spoke to Aliza. They were back in his throne room, the place was as awful as ever. On the middle of the floor Crowley had drawn symbols with blood – probably not his own, but Aliza didn't want to think about that now – and on the symbols were the Cupid's bow and the angel grace. The only thing missing was her heart.

Crowley started reciting the spell Castiel had given her. Her entire day she had felt beyond terrible. She had walked towards this place, and by every bridge, every car that sped by, she wondered whether it was better to kill herself in a non-ritual way. It was more honorable than betraying your friends and loved one. Yet she managed to drag herself in this hell-hole once more. Crowley's weird flirting didn't help to lighten the mood. There was an enormous pressure on her, the feeling something immensely important was about to happen.

CRACK! An invisible force slammed down on the Cupid's bow and blew it to smithereens. The blood symbols started to swirl and vibrate with power.

One down.

* * *

'Sam stop questioning me! What other demon could she possibly go to? They would all kill her instantly. No, Crowley is the only one that would make a deal with her!' Dean yelled to his brother. His eyes were locked on the road in front of him. The impala sped up to the max, trying to reach the dungeon in time. Castiel had found a way to track down the king of Hell.

Castiel was in the back of the car, concentrating on the demon they tried to find. He could get glimpses of what was going on around Crowley. Earlier he saw a dark room with a throne. So far it was hard to find anything else.

'Why are you so sure she is with a demon? I get the thing about the necklace, but she could have forgotten it,' Sam tried. He simply tried to come up with other options in the case they were going down the wrong road. Sam worried for Aliza's life as much as Dean and Castiel did, and that is why he tried to keep an open mind. He wasn't as blinded by emotions as the other two clearly were.

Images wouldn't get to him, but Castiel could clearly feel great power vibrating in his mind. Crowley was doing something significant. He was about to share it, when another image flashed in. There were Enochian symbols on the ground, drawn in blood. At the other side of the symbols, stood Aliza. She looked up at Castiel with sad eyes.

'She is with Crowley,' he panted. The mind-trick was quite exhausting.

Dean looked at him in the rearview mirror. 'Good, now tell me where she is.'

* * *

The pressure in the room started to rise. Aliza rubbed at her sensitive ears. Crowley was studying the paper he had in his hand and spoke the words slowly and carefully. With every second that ticked by Aliza wanted to stop him more and more.

 _I'm saving the world._

 _I'm saving heaven._

 _I'm saving the world._

 _I'm saving heaven._

A big explosion suddenly erupted from the angel grace in the middle of the symbols. A cloud of blue and black swirled up and the pressure rose once more.

* * *

Finally they found the mausoleum where Crowley was hiding. Cas strolled through the hallways as quickly as he could. The place was keeping him from using his wings, but not his grace. Demons rushed at him, ten at a time. Castiel held his hand up and a blinding white light erupted from his palm. A second later the light subsided and the demons were all dead on the floor.

Dean and Sam followed the angel through the halls. They were able to protect themselves, but Castiel didn't even give them a chance to. He was so angry, that all his powers welled up and made him even more bad-ass. So the brothers decided to follow him through the halls.

Suddenly Cas stopped.

'What is it?' Dean asked, panic in his voice.

Cas had a blank look on his face. 'The second item has been sacrificed. Aliza is next.'

* * *

'Are you ready sweetie?' Crowley asked as he held his hand out. Aliza stepped on top of the blood symbols, careful not to wipe them out.

In her last moment she let her walls down. All the emotions flowed back into her. The guilt, the sadness, the discomfort…but also the love. The love she felt for Castiel. The love she was going to sacrifice.

But that was also her reminder to keep going. Castiel deserved better. She had to save him.

Crowley showed her an angel blade, the weapon he intended to kill her with.

'No,' she spoke clearly, 'not an angel blade. I am human enough to kill me with a normal blade. I do not deserve an angel death,' she said, her voice breaking near the end.

Crowley put the blade away. 'Whatever you want,' he said, a tat annoyed. He picked up a regular blade. The thing was quite beautiful, an antique.

'Shall I do the favour?' Crowley asked.

Aliza nodded.

Crowley started reciting the last words that were necessary for the spell. His volume raised as he grew more enthusiastic. He nearly yelled the last words, and drew his arm with the blade back, ready to strike.

 _I love you, Castiel._

* * *

 _I love you, Castiel._

It were the most beautiful and terrifying words he had ever heard. He knew it was now or never. He just hoped they were in time…

* * *

Aliza took a deep breath to brace herself for the blow.

The blow came. A loud sound echoed through the room. Aliza opened her eyes when she realized it wasn't the blade that made the sound. It were the doors.

In the next second Crowley flew backwards into his throne. His back hit the seating, and he crumpled down uncomfortable. Aliza swung her head around to face the intruders.

Who else could it be but team free will.

'Aliza!' Dean and Sam shouted in unison.

Aliza looked back at Crowley, searching for the blade. It had shoved across the floor, away from the dazzled demon. Aliza looked back at the boys. She looked at Cas. He looked enraged and scared at the same time. But there was no time for that now. She threw herself at the blade.

'Stop!' Dean yelled.

Aliza took the blade and returned to the symbols. Once she was back, something threw her across the floor. She shoved in between two pillars, away from the action. She looked up to see Castiel walking in her direction.

'I don't want to fight you. Aliza, please. You need to see this is wrong,' he said, his voice and face all pain.

'And you need to see there is no other way!' She yelled. Then, against her instincts, she threw her leg up and kicked Castiel hard against his shin. He doubled over, taken aback by the attack. Aliza walked past him to search for the blade, but she couldn't find it. That was when she looked up at Crowley, and saw him back on his feet, blade in hand. But before she could reach him Dean and Sam threw themselves at Crowley. They struggled to get the blade from his hand. Crowley tried to choke them with 'the force', but it wasn't effective enough. Both brothers kept coming for him.

While Aliza stared, Cas grabbed her by the back of her collar and yanked her into his arms. His arms locked across her upper arms and chest, immobilizing her. It was the first time she was highly dissatisfied with his arms around her.

'Aliza, please stop this. I can't lose you,' he pleaded in her ear.

Aliza sighed while she struggled. 'Don't you see Cas? You are never going to defeat Metatron! I don't care about the angels backing you, they aren't strong enough now. I will lock the angels back in heaven, where they belong. Once there, you guys can form a strong front and defeat Metatron. This will save the world _and_ heaven!'

Cas was quiet for a moment. 'You can't die because of that,' he said.

Aliza pushed her elbow back in his ribcage. His grip loosened for a second but it was enough time for her. All the fighting techniques came back to her. Only this time, she didn't have to go easy. It wasn't that easy to break Cas. She turned in his arms, grabbed his face and knocked her forehead into his nose. She hears a cracking sound. Then she quickly pulled herself out of his arms. Cas held his hand up to his nose, catching the blood that leaked.

'And that is why you are not going to win this war, Cas. You care more about me than heaven,' Aliza told him. Castiel looked at her. He knew she was right, but he wasn't going to let her die. No more would die for him. Not this special person.

'If you truly see it that way, then I'll fight you,' Cas said, healing his nose and getting ready for an attack.

Aliza smirked. 'Wondered when you were going to begin.'

Castiel rushed at her. He wasn't wielding any weapon, because he didn't accidentally wanted to kill her. Aliza anticipated his steps and stopped his fist mid-air. She grabbed onto his fist and twisted his wrist. Then she hit him in the low abdomen three times over. She released him while there was still movement in him, so he took a couple of steps past her. He coughed up some blood and looked back at her.

Despite the seriousness of the moment, Aliza enjoyed seeing herself besting an angel. A part of her forgot who Cas was, and just saw him as the endless rush of crap that tried to fight her in her life. The vampire that chased her down to Bobby's car yard. The demon that possessed her mother and killed her parents. John Winchester that hit her and told her she was a monster. The kids that left her out of the group. The college students that despised her for sleeping with a teacher. The monsters she hunted. The noisy reviewers from her books. The endless tidal wave of demons. And finally the angels.

And now, it was Castiel.

Castiel placed his hand against a pillar and made a shock go through the funding of the building. The ground shook for a moment, and a big piece of concrete crashed down from the ceiling. Aliza held her hands up, but the crash was still effective. She had a major headache as she climbed from the rubble. Cas was back on her in a second. He took her hair and crashed her into a table. She went right through the furniture. Once on the ground she was disorientated. Cas took advantage. He stood over her, looking down at her with a disappointed look.

'Can we stop now?' He pleaded.

Aliza smiled, her teeth were red with blood. 'Honey, we are just getting started.'

A lose table leg was to her left. She picked the sharp piece up and threw it at his face. He took the thing before it hit him, but Aliza only used it as distraction. She jumped back on her legs and locked herself around Castiel's waist. She rammed him backwards into a closet. He smashed through the wooden doors and laid uncomfortable between the rubble.

Why was she having so much fun? Was this her kind of relationship therapy? Or was it just the thrill of nearly dying and not giving a fuck?

Castiel gathered himself. He dusted off his trench coat in a state of rage. He rushed back at Aliza and surprised her by taking her elbow and twisting her arm around her back. He lifted it up painfully high, and it almost broke. Aliza screamed out in pain. The joy, or rush she was feeling disappeared. She was angry again. Angry and annoyed. She kicked back, trying to hit Cas in the nuts, but he took her leg with his other hand and squeezed hard on her kneecap. She was stuck in an incredible painful and impossible position.

She had a moment to look back to Crowley and the Winchester brothers. They seemed to have some distance between them. Crowley stood in front of his throne, blood dripping from him, suit ruined. Sam and Dean were at the other side of the blood symbols, looking equally torn up. Aliza saw that Castiel was going to win this sooner or later. She needed to get Crowley at her side, maybe the tables would turn that way.

She twisted her head around and bit Castiel in his neck. It was mean and harsh, but she didn't see another way out. He released her limbs and she quickly ran to the king of hell.

Dean and Sam looked up at her. Castiel joined them, hand covering his bleeding neck.

'Aliza, why do you need to do this? There is another-,' Sam tried.

'There isn't,' she snapped back. 'You guys simply care more about me than heaven and earth.'

'Aliza is the only one here to see reason!' Crowley spat at the boys. Somehow the blade had ended up right next to him. He picked it up and looked at Aliza, who looked between the boys and the blade. She never wanted them to be here, to see this.

'Leave now, and let us finish this,' she hissed.

'But why? Aliza, why are you the one to sacrifice yourself?!' Dean yelled in desperation.

'Because hell, I fell in love with an angel and now I am paying the price!' she yelled back.

Instead of looking at Dean, she looked Castiel in his blue eyes. Even in this weird moment, they were filled with love. Her heart clenched as she saw how much she was hurting him. But she _couldn't_ do the same as the boys.

'Do it!' she said to Crowley. She spread her arms to give him space to her heart.

Crowley moved quick, but not quick enough. Castiel used his powers to shove Aliza across the floor. She landed in his arms, where he held her firmly against his chest.

'I can't lose you. I love you,' he said, his voice nearly breaking.

Aliza pushed herself up carefully, so she could look in his eyes. Tears welled up in her eyes. What was she doing? Why was she hurting the man she loved?

'Castiel, I-,'

Her eyes sprung wide open. Her mouth gave a small gasp when it opened wide. Cas looked down at her, searching her for the reason she had stopped talking. Dean yelled next to them, as he stared at Aliza in horror.

Crowley had taken his chance. While the rest was distracted, he had thrown the blade. And now the hilt stuck out of her back, the blade piercing through her spine.

A line of blood streamed from her mouth. Her eyes were big and full of terror. Castiel swore he could see her blue eye fade to the same shade as her other, green-grey eye.

'No,' Castiel said, at the brim of panic. 'No, no, no!'

Aliza's eyes rolled into her sockets and she collapsed in his arms. He placed her on the floor, her head resting on his knee.

'Aliza! No! Not like this! Please, please don't. Stay with me,' he pleaded.

'Stay with me, stay with me.'

'STAY WITH ME!'

'You are too late, Cassie boy. It is over, the spell will work,' Crowley said, pleased with himself.

'Cas, that means you will get sucked back in heaven!' Dean yelled.

But he didn't give attention to Crowley or Dean. It was like he was going deaf. The only thing he still heard, was Aliza's fading heartbeat. She had her eyes open again and looked up at him.

'I've got you, I've got you,' he hushed to her. If this was her last moment, he was going to sooth her the best he could.

'I love you. And I know you love me too, I know. Just…please don't leave me,' he whispered in her ear.

He was faintly aware of Dean and Crowley's fight. Dean fired an entire ammo of rock salt into the demon, while also shooting with a normal gun. Even if it didn't kill him, Dean needed the satisfaction of using Crowley as a practice dummy.

Someone was tugging on Castiel's shoulder. At first friendly, but then roughly. Cas tried to ignore it. He didn't listen to what the person was yelling in his ear. He could only look at the woman he loved.

The woman that was dying in his arms.

Fresh tears fell down on her face. She tried with all her might to keep her eyes open, but it wouldn't take long.

The person that yanked on him, pulled something out of Castiel's trenchcoat pocket. He held it right in front of his face, trying to get Cas to look at the object.

And then he did.

Heavenly fire.

Castiel finally looked up at Sam, who held on to Cas' shoulder. His voice faded back into his world.

'Cas! Use the grace! You were sure it could help her! Do it, it is her only chance!' Sam told him firmly.

He should have thought it over. He should have considered the consequences.

But none of that mattered.

He undid the top of the vial and let the Heavenly fire swirl free into the air. He brought the vial down to Aliza's mouth. She still looked at Cas, but her eyes were nearly closed. She didn't move. He suddenly realized her breathing had stopped.

'Aliza, hold on!'

The illuminating substance entered her mouth, going all the way down to her soul. The light died and nothing happened. Aliza laid still.

'Aliza!' Cas yelled again.

Crowley had left. Dean was done shooting and knelt down by the others. Aliza was surrounded by her friends. Her family.

Dean placed an hand on Castiel's shoulder. 'Cas, it's too late.'

 _BAM!_

A deafening sound rang through the room, together with a blinding light. Both came from Aliza's body. All three fell back on the floor by the sudden explosion of power. Aliza's body was jerked up in the air. She was floating mid-air.

Castiel recovered from the shock and looked back at her.

'Close your eyes! Cover your ears!' he yelled at Sam and Dean.

The power that was erupting from her soul and body were overwhelming. It seemed to increase every tense second that passed by in the with light filled room. Together with the high screeching sound, there was the sound of a voice. Aliza's voice. At first it was unnoticeable, but she started to scream louder and louder. She screamed in pain.

Then all the light and sound imploded on her, to explode a second later. All the pressure went out to shatter the windows and rumble the walls.

Then it was quiet.

Dean and Sam dared to look again. But what they saw, they couldn't believe. Cas stood with them, staring in great wonder.

Aliza stood in the middle of the room. All her wounds were healed. Her skin looked perfect: no birthmark or scar left. Her clothing was restored as well. She still wore her shirt with a bunny in glasses and tie and flannel blouse, but even that seemed so magnificent like she was wearing a ball gown. Her normally unruly curls were perfectly styled, no hair out of place.

But none of that was the real eye-catcher. All of her newfound perfection fell into the shadows, compared to the enormous, majestic dark brown objects protruding from her back.

Aliza had wings.

After staring at her for what felt like hours, she opened her eyes and gasped. Her gaze was fixed on the ground, but after a moment she looked up at the three men. They all gasped when they saw _two_ perfectly blue eyes instead of one.

'Aliza,' Cas breathed.

She fixed her gaze on him. 'Castiel.'

She tried to take a step forward but almost fell down. Cas reached forward to grab her elbows.

'What the-,'

Aliza looked over her shoulder. Had she seriously just felt that extra weight on her back? Her eyes grew in shock when she noticed the wings she was carrying.

'I…have wings?' she asked.

'They are beautiful,' Cas told her softly.

She tore her eyes away from the feathered wonders to look at Cas.

He smiled kindly as he said: 'Aliza, you are an angel.'

She just looked at him for a long moment, trying to process his words.

'I am sorry, can you repeat that?'

Cas smiled his most honest smile. 'You are an angel.'

Aliza let go of Cas his support and stood on her own legs. She looked over at Sam. He gave a nervous laugh, with an expression that said 'not bad'. Dean still seemed petrified, but he seemed just as impressed. Without thinking it over, she tried to find her new muscles.

With a loud _flap_ the wings folded out to spread out far and wide. The gesture moved so much air that Sam and Dean were pushed back a step.

'Oops, sorry,' she apologized.

But she wasn't done. She jumped up into the air and ordered her wings to carry her. And they did. Aliza surprised herself by not falling on her face. Her wings flapped, making a little storm inside. The sound was almost like a dragon flying over. Damn this was awesome.

Then she landed carefully back on her feet.

'You are a natural talent,' Cas complimented her. He kept staring at her new body parts.

At first she smiled, secretly liking the compliment. But soon her smile faded. She found Cas's gaze back and looked him hard in the eyes.

'You stopped me,' she told him. She didn't think she had ever sounded that intimidating before.

'I couldn't let you die,' Castiel pleaded. He took a step in her direction, but she stopped him. Not by a gesture, but she physically stopped him with an invisible force. Cas looked down at his chest.

'You learn quickly.'

'Don't change the subject, Castiel! You stopped the spell. You made the last Nephilim an angel. The spell can't be redone. The angels can't return to heaven now,' she said stern.

'Of course they can,' Sam said.

Aliza perked her head up to look at Sam. 'And how is that?'

Sam smiled at her. 'We stop Metatron.'

Aliza sighed and rolled her eyes. 'You stubborn, thick-headed people! I am getting sick of your arguments! Cas is still no leader and-,'

'No, Cas is no leader, you were right about that,' Sam interrupted her.

They stared for a long intense moment before Aliza dropped her arms to her sides.

'And then who is going to lead the angels against Metatron? Who is strong enough to do that?'

Sam and Dean exchanged a look. Cas seemed to be in on the plan.

'You are.'

* * *

 **BAM! just like that, big moment!**

 **How did you guys like this part? This was one of my favorite chapters to write.**

 **Hang in there for the grand finale in heaven! We are nearing the end of this story!**


	20. Chapter 20

**How to angel?**

Aliza could feel everything around her. Her eyes were closed, but she didn't need to look to see. She felt the small creatures crawling in the ground. She felt the life of the trees and the plants surrounding her. She heard everything too. A leaf that hit the ground two miles away. A little stream of water that ran somewhere through the forest. When she was really concentrating, she could even feel Dean and Sam walking around in the bunker beneath her feet.

That was what she needed to focus on. The bunker. She pictured the room in her head. The books on the shelves, the lights on the table and the empty beer bottles laying around. She saw the place so clearly, she imagined herself being there. She imagined Dean's face when she would appear right in front of him.

Without noticing, her wings carried her to the place. Only somehow she bumped into a wall on her way there. Aliza fell back on her butt, her wings making way for her.

'Auch,' she proclaimed.

Dean and Sam looked up at where she was lying. Dean couldn't help but chuckle.

'Were you trying to sneak up on us?' he said with a big smile.

Aliza took Dean's hand and hoisted herself back up on her feet. 'Maybe.'

Sam shoved his hands in the pockets of his jeans and leaned against the wall.

'How are you doing? Being an angel and all.'

Aliza let her fingers trail over her forehead where she had hit the wall. There was no bump. It wasn't even painful anymore. Angels feel less and heal faster, she stated.

'It's difficult. Like suddenly trying to do a top sport level without ever having practiced. Cas is asking too much of me.'

Dean looked at her wings as he spoke. 'He is doing his best to help you. And the angels. By the way, why can we see your wings, but not of any other angel?'

'That is because Aliza had yet to learn how to hide them. It's a skill she will quickly learn,' Castiel said seconds after he arrived in the room. Instead of bumping into a wall, he appeared exactly where he wanted to. Next to Aliza.

'Well I can't wait! These things are heavier than they look,' Aliza complained.

Cas chuckled and stroked the wings at the base. Aliza looked shocked. A sudden weird feeling went all through her.

'What the hell was that?' she asked Cas, eyes big and full of horror.

Cas tipped his head to the side, his smile never leaving his face. 'Wings are very special for an angel. They are personal. They are also more sensitive for sexual tension.'

'OKAY! I'm leaving!'

Aliza spun on her heels and started for the door. Her wings were not ready to transport her correctly, but they could lift her off the ground. She took a leap into the air and flew to the door of the basement. Her shoes made a satisfying _clink!_ Sound when they hit the steel floor at the top of the stairs, and she smiled when she opened the door.

Once outside she continued her training. That first time she could stop Castiel from walking at her. However, she couldn't do it again. It must have been the heat of the moment that made her so strong.

A lot of things bothered her about being an angel. She kept searching her skin for the familiar marks that made her who she was. There used to be a biting mark in her left calf from when a werewolf bit her. For a complete month she had waited for the change to come. She should have transformed at the full moon, but she didn't. That was the real moment she believed she wasn't human. John Winchester yelling it in her face was enough to believe in fairytales as a kid, but actually escaping from turning into a Lycanthrope convinced her she wasn't normal.

She also used to miss a chip out of her earlobe. The moment that happened she couldn't recall, but it was weird to have flesh grown back where it wasn't supposed to be.

But by far the weirdest thing, were her eyes. She had never liked her mismatching eye colors, but suddenly seeing this intense blue color freaked her out even more. She always liked the green-grey eye better, and hoped her eyes would turn that color. But no, she was an angel now. Angels needed perfect eyes.

She was so lost in her inner debates, that she didn't hear Cas appear behind her.

'I am sorry, that was inappropriate,' he said softly.

Aliza spun around to face him. She figured he had needed those ten minutes since she left the bunker to figure out why she was upset.

'It's okay Cas. Just…not in front of the boys,' she said, feeling a little awkward.

Cas smiled again as he walked up to her. They stared into each other's eyes for a while.

'Your eyes are beautiful. Yet, I liked it better when they were different. It made you more special,' Cas said while stroking her jaw with his fingers.

'They were weird because I was weird. Part angel, part human. Now there is no human left in me. I'm full angel,' she said, withholding the sadness.

Cas noticed her mood and stroked her hair lovingly. Aliza closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling for a while.

'You are not exactly the same as other angels. You are still more human than us,' he told her.

She raised an eyebrow. 'In what way?'

Cas lowered his hand and stared off into the distance. 'You were born on this earth, not in heaven. Up until now, you have lived a mortal life. You don't have to follow God's word. You are different in many ways. But most important, you are bound to one vessel. You see, I am not the person you see. The person you see-,'

'Is Jimmy, yes I remember,' Aliza cut in, not in the mood to talk about her collage teacher.

Cas looked at her for a moment, but read her face. 'But you…this is you. This is your face, your voice, your body.'

Aliza crossed her arms. 'But then how can I be an angel? How would my 'true form' look?'

Cas shrugged. 'No idea. You are new. This never happened before. It's only a guess. My guess, was to see this face, but then the same size as us, with massive wings that would spread across a city.'

Aliza looked a little uneasy. She tugged on her sleeve. Cas read her and moved in closer.

'Honestly, I think it is exciting. You are once again a mystery to be solved. Or not to be solved,' he told her with a smile of affection.

Aliza couldn't help but smile as well, looking at his happy face. She giggled and gave him a playful push on his arm. Cas hesitated for a moment, his arms moving up and down. Then he decided to go for it and hug her. Cas pulling her in his arms was the best feeling in the world. Before, he was this magnificent being that stood high above her. She always felt that tension she had felt since she figured out what she was. Angels were supposed to be her enemies, and finding one should be her death. But now she was one of them. And hugging Castiel in this moment wasn't like hugging the person above you. It was warm and meaningful.

Aliza stiffened when she felt his hands stroking her wings again. It was a feathery touch – pun intended – and it send goosebumps all over her body. She coughed uneasily.

'I will learn you to hide them. You must before you face the other angels,' he said, tickling her neck with his lips.

'If wings are so personal, is it like…walking around naked?' Aliza asked, feeling awkward about the things.

Cas chuckled. 'No, not really. Wings are also a sign of power. But it is best to hide them. It will lessen the complications.'

'Yeah, I bet we already have enough,' Aliza said while rolling her eyes. She let Cas go and faced him again.

'Do you really think I can lead an army of angels?' She asked desperately.

Cas avoided her eyes. He looked out into the forest when he thought about his answer.

'The Heavenly Fire you took makes you stronger than any other angel, even archangels. Metatron doesn't stand a chance in a battle against you at full power.'

Aliza started pacing. 'That is not what I mean. I do not care about firepower. I mean: do you think the angels will listen to me? Even when they know what I am?'

Cas looked over his shoulder, but his eyes were still cast to the ground. 'What you were.'

Aliza was so frustrated by his reply, that she pulled on her power and pushed him away. Cas was so taken aback that he fell onto the mossy ground. He looked up with big eyes.

'Stop giving me sideways answers! No angel is going to follow a Nephilim that "stole" the Heavenly Fire and became a useless freaking bird that can't fly! Honestly, I am not strong. I don't even know how to control this shit. You are the proof of that, laying there on the floor. I didn't mean to topple you over, but it happened. And when I face Metatron, I intend to destroy him but instead I'll tickle him!'

Cas pushed himself back to his feet. Some leafs clung to his clothing so he brushed them off. After he was clean of dirt, he placed a firm hand on Aliza's shoulder, forcing her to look at him.

'Stop this. This insecurity is the reason your powers aren't working the way you want it. The strongest angels that ever existed gave you their powers and you show them your back. I can see you never wanted to be an angel, but I didn't have another choice. The world would _not_ have been better with the angel locked up in heaven and you dead. Now, you need to embrace it. Aliza, you are an angel, no longer a Nephilim. The other angels will follow you if you convince them you are worth following. I loved you as a Nephilim and now I love you as an angel. But you have to be the best version of the angel you can be,' Castiel said.

There was a lump in her throat after that speech. She looked down and back up. She breathed a couple of times deeply.

'You're right,' she finally said.

Cas gave her a slight smile. 'After all of that, we can finally be together. There will always be problems, always big responsibilities. But we will face all of it together.'

Aliza was in a moment of strength. His speech had encouraged her to pick up the training and try harder than possible. Cas tried to sooth her with his kind words, but now wasn't the time to be emotional.

'Alright. Let's do this.'

* * *

The warehouse they were standing in was surprisingly livingly. It was supposed to be an abandoned storage place, but this time of the year it was sheltering a large group of angels. The place looked like a true company. There were computers running on GPS systems or following news sites. There were actually angels doing paperwork and writing Word documents. Aliza had to try very hard to get that smirk of her face; it was all just kind of hilarious to her. But if she would walk in here with an opening like: 'did you use the grammar check?' no one was going to take her serious.

It didn't take long before people started noticing the two of them walking in. Several curious faces peeked over their screens to see the intruder. All the chatter and typing noises died away. Aliza tried very hard not to seem intimidated, but she did swallow loudly. In her head it was so loud that the people across the street could hear it.

The first thought that ran through Aliza's head was ' _thank god I learned how to hide my wings in time. Please don't pop back up…'_ Cas and Aliza had practiced two days straight to get those things out of sight. At one point she just wished them to be gone so badly it suddenly happened. Cas was so happy he _squealed_ out of that they continued the normal training and didn't stop until either Aliza or Cas begged for mercy. They could heal each other, so they could go pretty far with the fighting. Aliza enjoyed the fighting practice. She got a similar rush to the one she had when they were fighting in Crowley's dungeon, yet this had different reasons. Cas wasn't portraying the crap of her life this time. This time she just enjoyed playing with her boyfriend. At some points it could get quite hot…

Finally a woman came up to Cas and Aliza. She had dark shoulder-length hair and a slim pointed face.

'Castiel. You have returned,' she said fondly. There was a twinkle of happiness in her eyes at seeing him again.

Aliza didn't like her.

'We have, Hannah,' he replied with a smile. 'And now is the time to strike.'

Hannah looked taken aback. 'Castiel, where is this suddenly coming from? You told us to do more research-,'

He held up his hand and she instantly silenced. 'There is no need any longer. We have the power and the plan.'

An adult male stood up from his chair. 'We don't have the power. That is the whole problem.'

Cas looked over at the male angel – or female, never know what is inside – and then scanned the faces in the room.

'We have Aliza. She is going to lead us to victory.'

This was the moment all the faces turned to her. She tried to restrain herself from fumbling with her hair.

'Hi.'

The angels kept staring at her like she was an insignificant speck of dust.

'Who is she then?' Hannah finally asked Cas. Her eyes kept inspecting Aliza, searching for anything special.

'Aliza is a newfound angel with incredible strength. I have seen it myself. She has the spirit and the mindset to defeat Metatron and open the gates,' Cas said full of pride.

'How is she newfound? Where have you been?' the man that spoke earlier asked.

Aliza's eyes looked over to Cas. 'She just became an angel,' Cas told them seriously.

Some of them gasped, others stared in horror. Hannah took a step back.

'Castiel! What kind of abomination have you brought here?' she said with a look of disgust.

Aliza started to heat up inside. She wanted so badly to strike the bitch down. Nothing about Hannah was likeable or even acceptable. The only reason to hold back was because Cas trusted her. And the angels weren't going to cheer for her if she killed an ally.

However, Aliza didn't need to do anything. Cas took a step forward towards Hannah. His posture was threatening.

'You do not get to speak to her like that! Aliza is the best and strongest person in this room! It doesn't matter that she was a Nephilim, she is still-,'

Then, hell broke loose.

'A Nephilim!' they all screamed in surprise, disgust and anger. They all started shouting at Cas and Aliza, and more to each other. Cas tried to calm them down, but he couldn't get the upper hand. He tried to silence them with force, but also that didn't work.

'Okay SHUT UP!' Aliza yelled at the top of her lungs, which she now found to be even stronger than before her transformation.

Somehow it worked. They all turned quiet and stared at her. There was still anger in their looks, but also curiosity.

Cautiously, she took a couple of steps further into the room. She scanned the faces of the angels, but decided to turn to one. Hannah.

'No secret there, I used to be a Nephilim. A mistake. A mistake, made by an angel! I didn't ask to be like this, but you people screwed up! And now you did it again. Humans trust angels to guard heaven and bring them to the afterlife. But what is happening? You guys fight each other like some bickering children! You are hundreds of years old, and yet you can't even do the one thing God asked you to? The one thing the humans ask you to?'

There was a deafening silence. No soul dared to say something. Some angry stares changed into ashamed looks. Hannah however, still looked like she was ready to pull the hairs out of Aliza's skull. For her own entertainment, Aliza decided to stand even closer to Hannah.

'And now here we are. The big alliance that is going to kick Metatron's ass and restore heaven the way it was. And what are you people doing? More bickering! Quit the shit and do what you should do! And if you guys only act when a leader tells you to, then you better follow me and Castiel.'

Hannah breathed through her nose. Aliza could have sworn steam came out.

'And why should we follow you?'

Aliza gave her a wicked smile. 'I might be a Nephilim, but I am the only goddamn soul that does something.'

There were some gasps at her choice of words, but then they were completely silent again. They just stared. Aliza rolled her eyes. Now she saw what kind of mindless followers angels were. All you have to do, it gain their respect.

And slowly, she started to gain it.

Cas placed a hand on her shoulder. 'Aliza will not stand alone. I will remain at her side at all times. Together, we can…how did you say it? Kick Metatron's ass,' he said, proud of himself. Aliza smiled at his adorableness.

'So,' Aliza started. She looked around, at this point deliberately ignoring Hannah. 'Can you set our little disagreement aside and follow us?'

There were a couple of heartbeats were nothing happened, and Aliza feared they would attack the two of them. But then one angel who still sat, stood up.

'I will follow you.'

Aliza gave the angel a kind smile. Then the next stood.

'I will follow you.'

And the next, and the next and so on. Every angel had spoken and said to follow Aliza and Cas. Every angel, except Hannah. Hannah stared at Cas.

'How could you do something like this? Why do you trust her?' she asked desperately.

Cas looked down at Aliza and placed his arm around her shoulders. He pulled her close into his chest.

'Because, hell, I fell in love with an Nephilim and now I'm paying the price.'

There was a stupid grin plastered to his face. Aliza felt a little offended, but to be honest, she thought it was the smartest thing to say. She poked him in his ribs with her elbow, trying not to show how emotional she could get over that little thing.

Hannah clearly didn't approve of their relationship, but hey, who cares. At least she seemed to calm down and see reason.

'Fine. If you think this is the way Castiel, then I will follow you. Both of you,' Hannah said.

Both looked back at her. Cas retracted his arm.

'Thank you Hannah,' he honestly said. He was just happy to not lose any of his followers. And so was Aliza. With a little bit of luck, they could stop Metatron.

'Okay, since that is settled,' Aliza began while moving over to a whiteboard to start lecturing, 'here is the plan.'

* * *

Metatron sat behind his desk. His type machine stood in front of him with a blank page ready to be written. But he wasn't going to write anything down.

A knock on the door startled the angel from his thoughts. After a moment one of his most loyal followers came in. He stopped in front of the vintage desk and waited until he was permitted to speak. This was one of the things that annoyed Metatron about angels. There was not a speck of specialness in them. They were soldiers, born to follow. Or at least, that is what they made themselves think. Metatron was the living proof that an angel could lead, even when he wasn't destined to be a leader. There was another example, but he despised the idiot in a trenchcoat too much to give him much thought.

Metatron waved for the angel to tell the news.

'My lord. We have spotted a group of Castiel's followers. They were aiming for the door to heaven. None of them succeeded to come in,' the angel reported.

Metatron took the glasses from his nose and carefully put them on the desk. Then he leaned forward, entangling his fingers as he leaned them on the hard wood.

'No one? Then why do I feel someone's presence in heaven?' he said patiently.

The angel looked frantically for an answer. 'M-my lord?'

Metatron chose his words carefully. 'If no one entered, then why is Castiel in heaven?'

Before the angel could come up with a response, he was grabbed by his throat and pulled back against another person. A shiny angel blade was pressed against his throat. The other hand had a firm grip on his shoulder. Castiel poked his head over the angel his shoulder, bringing his lips to his ear.

'Do not move, or you will die,' he said through his teeth.

Metatron didn't even rise from his chair. 'Castiel. What an absolute pleasure…no wait. It really isn't.'

The angel in the trenchcoat looked at the scribe of God. 'Metatron. You will listen to me, or he will die.'

Metatron simply chuckled. 'You think I care? Castiel, I thought you knew me better than that.'

With a snap of Metatron's hand, the angel's neck snapped and he fell to the floor. There was a blinding light and deafening sound. When they stopped, there was a print of his wings branded into the floor. Cas watched helplessly. He hated to watch a brother or sister die.

Cas looked back up at Metatron. The small guy had an evil smirk on his face.

'Oh come on! You couldn't have honestly thought that was a solid plan.'

Metatron felt something snake around his neck. It were fingers, that slid against his skin, until the full hand was in place and started squeezing. Metatron's eyes popped open in surprise.

You're right, that wasn't the full plan,' the voice from the person behind him spoke. The voice was feminine, and very calm.

'Y-you were dead,' Metatron said with difficulty.

Aliza chuckled in his ear and looked up at Castiel for a moment. 'No silly. Do you really think I would pray to you without a good plan? Honey, have you seen Muriel around lately?'

Metatron looked up at Cas, because he couldn't see Aliza's face. 'You killed him.'

'No, I stole his grace. Then he killed himself.'

Metatron decided to try at breaking free. He placed a hand over hers and tried to burn her with his angelic power. Her skin was supposed to bubble and burn. Instead, nothing happened.

Aliza placed her other hand over his, and started sending waves of power into him. It build up to static electricity and it gave Metatron a big shock. He shook his hand violently.

'No, no you can't do that! You stole grace?' Metatron whined in despair.

'Well, the way there was a little longer, but yeah. I am an angel now. A pretty damn powerful one,' she told him.

'You are a disgrace! You don't belong in heaven!' he squeaked.

'I don't want to be in heaven. But there are a couple of angels that do. You are going to open the gates again. And after that, you will go to prison.' Aliza pushed him forward into the room. The little man stumbled over his own feet and ended up nearly falling over Castiel. He looked back to take a look at Aliza.

'You changed so much,' he said lowly. He still loathed her for becoming an angel, but he also saw the beauty. She was the purest creature he had ever seen. Then it hit him.

'This can't be normal grace to change you so much,' Metatron said.

Aliza walked towards him and he flinched. He hated to feel so intimidated, but he simply knew she was stronger than him.

'Enough talking. Let's go,' Aliza said.

Metatron tried to get some of his confidence back. 'I have a lot of guards outside who will fight you the moment you walk through that door.'

Cas took a hold of Metatron's collar and pulled him closer. 'Didn't you listen? Our followers are fighting them right now.'

Metatron looked from Cas to Aliza. 'So, they were a diversion, and so were you? Aliza is the final endgame then?'

Aliza leaned in to whisper in his ear. 'That is for us to know…blah blah blah.'

The little angel seemed to get bright red from anger and irritation. He couldn't do a thing, except what they asked of him.

'Fine.'

* * *

Aliza and Castiel watched every move Metatron made. He was casting a spell to open the gates again, and they knew he was doing it correctly. He was busy drawing sigils on the floor, when Aliza let out a long withheld sigh. Cas looked over at her.

'Are you alright?' he asked on a low tone, not inviting Metatron into the conversation.

Aliza smiled up at him. 'Just relieved it is working. This rat better not try any more tricks.'

They both looked down upon the angel. He had stopped to try to listen to their conversation. Angels had better hearing, but they also knew how to shield a conversation from another angel.

'What are you going to do with him after he is done?' Aliza asked.

'Like you said, he will go to prison. A prison in heaven is one you are not getting out of. For eternity,' Cas said harshly.

'Sounds cozy,' Aliza replied, her mind wandering. What was she going to do after this? Now that the ritual didn't require her death, she actually had a chance at a life with Cas. But how was she going to spend it? The angels needed a leader for this attack, but would they ask Cas to stay in heaven and rule? They were still with the problem of no other leader. She sure as hell wasn't going to stay in here. So, would she go back to hunting with Dean and Sam? She would love to, but there were some complications now.

For example, she was an angel.

She had learned the basics of how to fight, but she still sucked at the entire 'angel of the lord' thing. Was Cas going to teach her? That thought cheered her up. Just the idea of Cas and her practicing in the bunker with Dean and Sam around…she needed nothing more.

'Alright. That is the setup. All I need to do now is perform the spell,' Metatron told them. Aliza shook herself from her wandering thoughts and focused back on the rather important task at hand. Cas and Aliza closed in to his work and judged ever single detail, making sure he wasn't playing them.

'I can't find anything that is wrong,' Cas told her.

Aliza looked over to the small man. 'Are you really not trying to trick us?'

He gave her a long and intense look. He did a try at puppy eyes to get her pity, but all she felt for this guy was loathing. He was pathetic.

'I agree. Maybe the angels should come back to heaven. Just, promise me something. Do that, and I'll cooperate completely,' he pleaded.

Aliza and Cas shared a look. That one look was enough to share their thoughts. They would listen but not promise a single thing. Cooperative or not, they were controlling him now. 'What?' Aliza asked.

'Whoever gets to be leader of heaven after me, don't let it be you,' he said to Aliza. Then he turned his head to Cas. 'Or you. You guys suck.'

Aliza got her 'fair enough' expression on. 'Yeah, he's right about that.'

Cas looked at her like she had gone insane, but he didn't say anything about it.

'Start the spell.'

Metatron did as he was told and performed the spell. Aliza could feel the power of the spell vibrating in her body and essence. This time it wasn't effecting her like it did with Crowley, this time it powered her up. She was no longer a misshapen thing in between an angel and a human. She was full on angel. And if she were honest with herself, she started to like this new her.

Cas stood next to her and took her hand. She looked down at their joined hands and then up to Cas. The look on his face was the most honest and pure thing. He looked at her with affection. With love. And in that moment, Aliza wondered why it was ever hard for her to say those words. She leaned in to his face and looked him in the eye with that same expression.

'I love you,' she told him.

Cas couldn't possibly have a bigger stupid grin on his face. Aliza chuckled at how odd it was that a century old angel could be this cute.

'I love you too,' Cas told her with all honesty.

The light in the room became so much that it blinded out all the details. The last thing Aliza could see were Cas's blue eyes.


	21. Chapter 21

**Epilogue**

 **The life of a hunter/Nephilim/angel**

'Sammy!' Dean yelled at the top of his lungs.

Sam was still not anywhere within sight. Well, not the real Sam anyway.

'You still don't get it, do you? Your brother doesn't care if you die. Then at least he can move on with his life,' the person in front of him told him.

Dean tried to block his words out, which wasn't a hard task. He was more concerned about the torture machine he was strapped to that slowly pulled his limps out. With every click of the wheels he felt his arms and legs lengthen up further. It wouldn't be long now until they would snap.

 _Damnit son of a bitch where are you?_ He thought. Sam had to fight of the partner outside, but by now he figured Sam had filleted the son of a bitch. Dean wasn't going to die because of a stupid shapeshifter with his brother's face.

The machine ticked again and Dean screamed in pain. Surely a bone had snapped by now, together with some flesh and muscles. One more tick would be enough to let go…

'Hey, assbutt.'

The fake-Sam turned around to see the person behind him. He didn't even get the chance to take a good look before the person placed a hand on his head. A blinding light erupted from his eyes and mouth. He screamed beyond anything that was human. But then again, he wasn't.

The limp body of fake-Sam fell the ground of the barn. Dean could finally see Aliza's face as she looked up at the machine. She snapped her fingers and the machine stopped mid-tick. Dean nearly started crying of relief.

'I was very close there to peeing my pants,' the Winchester joked.

Aliza snapped again to release his ankles and wrists. Dean right away slipped to the ground, but not before Aliza could catch him to prevent anything breaking. Dean tried to hide the pain he was feeling, but it was clear to Aliza he was at the brim of dying. She placed her fingers gently to his forehead and healed all that was broken. Dean looked up at her, a surprised look on his face now that he felt fine again.

'Thank you,' he breathed as he struggled to get back to his feet.

'Most welcome,' she said lightly.

Dean looked out to the dark forest behind the open doors. 'Where is Sam?'

As if on cue, Sam and Castiel walked in. Sam seemed to be completely fine, but Cas had probably healed him already.

'Sammy,' Dean breathed. He got up to his brother and embraced him quickly. Then he flicked his hand against his head.

'Ouch! What the-,'

'Where were you! I was kind of stretching my time here!'

Aliza chuckled at his pun, and gained three pair of eyes focused on her. Dean now looked her over seriously. She looked so different from the last time he saw her. She was wearing a dress that looked both classy and functional. It was a dark blue shade, with a low neckline and a bottom half that flowed around her thighs. She was wearing a shiny leather jacket over it, what matched her sturdy boots. She looked like she could take you out on a date and end it by burying you in your grave.

Dean was honestly glad to see the two angels again. It had been a couple of months since they last met. In the meantime Dean and Sam did the usual: saving people, hunting things. The family business.

'So, how is it up there?' Sam asked the both of them. He pointed his finger up, not indicating the roof they were standing under.

Cas walked around to side Aliza. 'It's still hard to get good control over the angels. They find it hard to listen to us, so we often have to intimate them.'

Dean laughed. 'Haha, that's funny. Cas, you can't even intimidate a kitten.'

Cas looked offended. 'That is not true.' He then looked down, considering whether Dean was right. 'But Aliza is doing most of that.'

'Now there is something that is a little easier to believe,' Dean said, his normal witty self returning. Aliza smiled. She loved to see the Winchesters like this: pumped up with adrenaline from nearly dying. It made them witty and cheerful. Mostly they were just glad to be alive.

'Heaven is doing fine for now. Unfortunately we still need to do a lot, but we are training a couple of angels to become the new leaders. In a matter of months they will take over and Cas and I will finally be able to leave. This is actually our first return to earth since the last time we met up,' Aliza explained.

Cas found a single hair that was out of place on Aliza's head. He took it carefully between his fingers and placed it were it belonged. 'This is a short-term vacation for us,' he mused.

'And you decided to start it with some shapeshifters?' Sam asked with a smile.

Aliza looked back at Sam's dead body. 'Sorry Sam. Seems like I killed you,' she said with a shrug.

He smiled even more. 'I'll see that through the fingers for this time.'

Aliza smiled back fondly. 'Yes, we thought saving your asses was the best way to spend our vacation. Maybe another case. Or two.'

Dean chuckled. 'An angel hunter? Damn, those monsters better look out.'

Cas looked at Dean incredibly. 'I helped you once with a hunt!'

Dean and Aliza looked at the lost angel. 'Yeah, you interrogated the cat.'

Sam, Dean and Aliza broke out in a laughter. Castiel looked lost, but in the end he chuckled along with them. Aliza knew their life was never going to be quiet or normal. There would always be monsters and people that thought they could rule the world. They were prepared for that kind of crap. But these little moments were worth every painful second of the way.

Those little happy memories in which Aliza was simply enjoying the company of her husband and brothers.

 **The end**

* * *

 **Hello again!**

 **It's the end of this story! it's over. Finito. Sorry for the long wait, I forgot I still had to upload this ^.^**

 **I would really like you to leave a comment behind on the story. Did you like the story, my writing and the characters? Please let me know, so I can improve.**

 **I'm not making any promises about future stories. Sometimes these inspirations come to me, but I haven't had any lately.**

 **Anyway, thank you for joining me on the road. So long, hunters!**


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